One day, Dank got really bored. (Well how would YOU like it being stuffed in the Beer Commune's Basement, huh??? WELL?!?!! My point exactly...) But, luckily, boredom is the mother of all creativity (i.e. Bob Stories), and since Dank was feeling all Hawaiian due to the warm Lower Shangri-La-ian days, he morphed into his alter ego, SPED (Sexy Pretty Exotic Dank), threw on a grass skirt and a lei, tapped out a little island rhythm with his feet and began to Hula. He was enthusiastically (however carelessly) gyrating around the basement interior, when suddenly-- POW!!!!!-- he bumped into Shelly, who exploded on contact with Dank's coconut cone brazier!!!!! The deafening noise disturbed the strubular Melvin from his Guinness-induced tantric stupor on the other side of the Commune, and he came rushing into the basement to find Dank, still in his Island Beauty threads, weeping over the deflated remains of what used to be his beloved palm tree. "OH MY GOD!!!" Melvin shrieked,"YOU KILLED SHELLY!!!! YOU BASTARD!!!!" Melvin's anguished wails brought Bob and Spam tearing into the dim recesses of the basement as well. SPAM, unable to cope, fainted on the basement floor, but, Bob, always prepared (he had Llama Scout Training after all), promptly dumped his Corona over Shelly in hopes of reviving the poor plant. But--ALAS!!-- not even the healing powers of good booze could save their plastic friend. So they buried her in the Kingdom of Michigan (Shelly's homeland) and had a 24-carat gold plated Shelly effigy erected in the central plaza of the Commune. They were very sad and sat around the statue crying and getting smashed, mourning their dearly departed Shelly, who was always a good plant and was allowed to come back and be 7th Deli's personal Guardian Palm Tree for the rest of eternity.
The End *sob!!*
Note from Lids, High Holy Goddess of Bobishness: This was written last Thursday, June 3rd, but Lids was too wound up about going to Arlington to remember to put it up!! Sorry Twig and Urchin!!!! Lids is just sloooooww...*grin*
In Bob We Trust,
~Lids!~
