Quotable Parents

"THE TRAINING OF CHILDREN IS A PROFESSION WHERE WE MUST KNOW HOW TO WASTE TIME IN ORDER TO SAVE IT."
Philosopher Jean Jacques Rousseau

"MAKING THE DECISION TO HAVE A CHILD - IT'S MOMENTOUS. IT IS TO DECIDE FOREVER TO HAVE YOUR HEART WALK AROUND OUTSIDE YOUR BODY."
Elizabeth Stone

"WHEN THE CHILDREN WERE BABIES...I USED TO GET UP AT NIGHT AND HOLD MIRRORS UNDER THEIR NOSTRILS TO MAKE SURE THEY WERE STILL BREATHING. I WORRIED ABOUT THEIR SPITTING OUT MORE FOOD THAN WENT INTO THEIR STOMACHS. I DEVELOPED A "THING" ABOUT GERMS. WHEN I CHANGED DIAPERS I WASHED THEIR HANDS. WHEN WE WENT BYE-BYE IN THE CAR, IT WAS LIKE MOVING THE CIRCUS. I HAD A FETISH ABOUT THE KIDS DRINKING THEIR MOO-MOO FROM ANY CUP THAT DIDN'T HAVE THEIR NAME ON IT. THEN, ALONG CAME THE THOUGHT-PROVOKING SLOGAN, "DON'T SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF," AND MY ENTIRE LIFE CHANGED.
Author/Humorist Erma Bombeck

"LITTLE CHILDREN ARE STILL THE ETERNAL MARRIAGE BETWEEN LOVE AND DUTY."
Author George Eliot

"CLEANING YOUR HOUSE WHILE YOUR KIDS ARE STILL GROWING IS LIKE SHOVELING THE WALK BEFORE IT STOPS SNOWING."
Comedienne Phyllis Diller

"MY ONLY ADVICE (TO PARENTS) IS TO STAY AWARE, LISTEN CAREFULLY, AND YELL FOR HELP IF YOU NEED IT."
Author Judy Blume

"WE ARE TOGETHER, MY CHILD AND I. MOTHER AND CHILD, YES, BUT SISTERS REALLY, AGAINST WHATEVER DENIES US ALL THAT WE ARE."
Author Alice Walker

"THE PHRASE "WORKING MOTHER" IS REDUNDANT."
Author Jane Sellman

"THE QUICKEST WAY FOR A PARENT TO GET A CHILD'S ATTENTION IS TO SIT DOWN AND LOOK COMFORTABLE."
Author Lane Olinhouse

"IF A CHILD IS TO KEEP ALIVE HIS INBORN SENSE OF WONDER HE NEEDS THE COMPANIONSHIP OF AT LEAST ONE ADULT WHO CAN SHARE IT, REDISCOVERING WITH HIM THE JOY, EXCITEMENT AND MYSTERY OF THE WORLD WE LIVE IN ."
Biologist Rachel Carson

"I REMEMBER LEAVING THE HOSPITAL ... THINKING 'WAIT, ARE THEY GOING TO JUST LET ME WALK OFF WITH HIM? I DON'T KNOW BEANS ABOUT BABIES! I DON'T HAVE A LICENSE TO DO THIS. (WE'RE) JUST AMATEURS.' "
Author Anne Tyler

(BECOMING A PARENT) IS STILL THE BIGGEST GAMBLE IN THE WORLD. IT IS THE GLORIOUS LIFE FORCE. IT'S HUGE AND SCARY-IT'S AN ACT OF INFINITE OPTIMISM"
Comedienne Gilda Radner

"BEFORE I ACTUALLY BECAME PREGNANT FOR THE FIRST TIME, I NAIVELY BELIEVED THAT THE ONLY PART OF MY BODY THAT WOULD BE AFFECTED WOULD BE MY TUMMY...I KNEW THAT I WOULD SAIL THROUGH PREGNANCY WITH JUST AN ADORABLE BUMP OF A TUMMY ATOP MY LEAN, ATHLETIC LEGS. YEAH, RIGHT. WHEN I WAS PREGNANT, I WAS PREGNANT FROM MY CHIPMUNK CHEEKS TO MY WATER RETAINING ANKLES."
Author Vicki Iovine

"THE HARDEST THING KIDS FACE TODAY IS LEARNING GOOD MANNERS WITHOUT SEEING ANY."
Performer Fred Astair

"...FOR BETTER OR FOR WORSE WAS MY ANSWER TO THOSE PEOPLE WHO THINK TIME HANGS HEAVY ON A MOTHER'S HANDS. SHE KNOWS THAT THE ONLY THING THAT HANGS HEAVY ON A MOTHER IS A TODDLER... SHE KNOWS THAT CAT FOOD IS NOT FATAL TO SMALL FRY, THAT ROMANTIC EVENINGS AT HOME WAS A MYTH, AND A MOTHER'S FIRST GRAY HAIR IS A WAR WOUND."
Alicia Anderson in her foreword to Lynn Johnston's For Better or For Worse Collection: Is This One of Those Days Daddy?

"SHE DISCOVERED WITH GREAT DELIGHT THAT ONE DOES NOT LOVE ONE'S CHILDREN JUST BECAUSE THEY ARE ONE'S CHILDREN BUT BECAUSE OF THE FRIENDSHIP FORMED WHILE RAISING THEM."
Author Gabriel Garcia Marquez

PARENTS ARE NOT QUITE INTERESTED IN JUSTICE, THEY ARE INTERESTED IN QUIET.
Humorist and Entertainer Bill Cosby

"LIFE AFFORDS NO GREATER RESPONSIBILITY, NO GREATER PRIVILEGE, THAN THE RAISING OF THE NEXT GENERATION."
Former Surgeon General C. Everett Koop

"PARENTS LEND CHILDREN THEIR EXPERIENCES AND VICARIOUS MEMORY, CHILDREN ENDOW PARENTS WITH VICARIOUS IMMORTALITY."
George Santayana

Painting: Auguste Renoir. Les Enfants De Caillebotte. Private Collection.

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