ONE LINERS

Q: What's the difference between purple and pink?
A: The grip.

Q: How do you find a Blind Man in a nudist colony?
A: It's not hard

Q: How is a woman like a condom?
A: Both of them spend more time in your wallet than on your dick.

Q: Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team?
A: Because anyone who can run, jump or swim is already in America.

Q: How do you circumcise a hillbilly?
A: Kick his sister in the jaw.

Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
A: About 45lbs.

Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband.
A: 45 minutes.

Q: What is it when a man talks nasty to a woman?
A: Sexual harassment.

Q: What is it when a woman talks nasty to a man?
A: $4.99 a minute.
Q: How are women and rocks alike?
A: You skip across the flat ones.

Q: What's the difference between a '90's woman and a Computer?
A: A '90's woman won't accept a three and a half inch floppy.

Q: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
A: Because breasts don't have eyes.

Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a brick?
A: When you lay a brick, it doesn't follow you around for
two weeks whining.

Q: If the dove is the bird of peace, what is the bird
of true love?
A: The little swallow.

Q: What's a blonde's favourite nursery rhyme?
A: Hump-me Dump-me.

Q: What's the difference between erotic and kinky?
A: Erotic is when you use a feather. Kinky is when you use
the whole chicken.

Q: Why do Greek men wear gold neck chains?
A: So they know where to stop shaving.

Q: What is the difference between medium and rare?
A: Six inches is medium, eight inches is rare.

Q: What are the small bumps around a woman's nipples for?
A: Its Braille for "suck here."

Q: Why do most women pay more attention to their appearance
than improving their minds?
A: Because most men are stupid but few are blind.

Q: Why do men die before their wives?
A: Because they want to.

Q: Why do women rub their eyes when they get up in the morning?
A: They don't have balls to scratch.


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