|
TOMOYO'S FLASHBACK MODE It was snowing outside. A little three year old Tomoyo is playing in the snow, frolocking everywhere. She was very happy. "Tomoyo!!! Time to come inside!" a maid said. Tomoyo obeyed, owing to the fact that she is very obedient. When she went inside, she rushed towards her room leaving the servants confused. It was Christmas Eve, and Tomoyo was staying up all night making something (I assure you it is NOT a teddy bear or anything like one). The heater emmited warmth that tempted the little girl to fall asleep, but she kept on trying. Finally, as she finished, she plopped on her bed and slept until Christmas morning. She woke up early rushing out of bed gathering her presents for her parents. She searched high and low, but no mother or father, just servants and maids saying, "Merry Christmas!" Then in her little pajama skirt, Tomoyo ran out of the house calling out her parents with her presents in her arms. When she found them, they told her that they couldn't attend Christmas morning with her and that she would have fun with her new presents. Poor little Tomoyo tried to tell them something, but in the end, they drove off not knowing how hurt their daugter was. She plopped onto the soft cool snow and cried. For hours, she sat there in the cold with only her pajamas on crying. The servants and maids tried to coax her to come inside, but she refused. Snowflakes kept drifting onto her soft and silky hair. Then the last snowflake fell gently and beautifly on a set of three scarfs and some caroling music that Tomoyo had written, so that she and her parents can sing to the neighbors...............................together, and not alone. END OF TOMOYO'S SAD FLASHBACK "Daidoji-san, daijobu (are you okay)?" Eriol asked. She finally snapped out of her trance and looked up. Tomoyo apologized and nibbled on her little sandwhich a bit. Such sad eyes, full of melancholly, it's like all of her hopes and dreams are sucked out of her......Eriol's face grimaced. He didn't want to see anymore sad faces, but felt very sympathetic towards Tomoyo. "Daidoji-san, I think you should go home, you do not seem well," Eriol suggested. "But-" she protested. "No buts, obviously you need some rest. I will escort you home," he insisted. They left and walked together towards her home. During their walk, Tomoyo decided to concentrate on her caring friend rather than her sad despair during her past Christmas. She looked up at him. He had a solemn face. It was like he was bored to death. Oh dear, I must've been in thought for so long, that he might think that I was ignoring him......she thought. She continued to stare at him and observe him. His face was still always the same. Two glasses, one nose, two eyes, dark blue hair (in my opinion it's dark blue), and either a serious mouth or a smiling mouth. However, there was something that was nagging her. Something in his expression that lacked its warmth, and joy. She couldn't place her finger on it. It was something. When they reached home, Tomoyo thanked him and they both said goodbye. Suddenly, the phone rang when she reached to her room. "Hello?" Tomoyo asked. "Konnichiwa (hello) Tomoyo!" a high cheerful voice announced. "Hello Sakura," Tomoyo greeted, "How was your date?" "It was great! Syaoran bought me ice cream, and we went to the shrine and got charms!" she squealed. Tomoyo was happy for Sakura, but in her heart, there was something that was nagging her. It was the fact that everybody has someone. Sakura has Syaoran, Mei and Yukito, Eriol has Nakuru and Spinel, Yue and Cerberus are like brothers, Fujitaka has Nadeshiko, Rika has Terada-sensai, Chiharu has Yamazaki, Naoko has her ghost stories that would keep her content eternally, Nakuru has Touya, well, not really, but, she has hopes for someone, but I have nothing but my busy family, a house full of servants, and high tech gadgets......she thought sadly. Her lip started to curve down. Tomoyo sniffed, and her heart had a nagging feeling that's keeping her down, something that was amidst, but none the, matter, she could not produce tears from her eyes. "How silly, I can't even cry. I cried during that Christmas, but now I can't. From that moment on, I couldn't cry........." Tomoyo sniffed. "How pathetic of me.........." "Daidoji-san, it's time for dinner," a maid said. "I'll be down in a minute!" Tomoyo said with an utmost forced cheerful voice. It took her every ounce of her heart to sound like she was all right. Four hours had passed as Tomoyo tried to cry endlessly, but she couldn't, she couldn't let out her sadness of being alone. She wanted to have a shoulder to cry on. Someone who would understand and make her feel better. No one was there though, her mother and father were on business trips, the servants won't understand, neither will her friends, so she could turn to no one but herself. Her heart ached to let loose the sadness, but the pain could not make her eyes burst with tears and let loose. Having no choice, she bottled it up, holding the sadness, the loneliness, and the pain. Monday morning came, and Tomoyo woke up early as possible to go to the music room. She wanted to get away from everything. The room welcomed her as she walked into it. The morning air soothed her a bit, but it wasn't enough to help her get through the pain she was going through. She sat at the piano bench and wimpered. Tomoyo didn't noticed that someone had entered the room. Until he sat next to her, she had noticed that Eriol was asking her, "Daijobu (are you okay) Daidoji-san?" Tomoyo couldn't take it any longer. The bottled up pain suddenly broke loose and tears finally came pouring. She was leaning on Eriol crying and crying. He didn't stop her, he understood that she needed to let everything out. He gently, and nervously smoothed out her hair and spoke to her, "Let it all out, you will feel better. If you want to confide in me, I will listen." Minutes passed as each tear drop fell on Eriol's sleeve. When Tomoyo stopped crying, he offered her his hankerchief. "Here, wipe your face," he said. "Arigato (thank you)," she spoke very quietly. "Gomen (sorry) to burst on you like that......." "It's okay," he said. "You can confide in me if you like. I am willing to listen and help." "You are a good friend Hiirigizawa-kun," Tomoyo almost smiled, but it was quickly smothered by a hurtfull skueak. "Please, if I am a good friend, call me Eriol," he said. "And you can call me Tomoyo," she replied with a small smile. "So what is wrong Tomoyo?" he asked. "It's just that, I always have this nagging feeling taunting my heart. I was always alone. My parents were on business trips, the servants wouldn't understand me, and now my best friend has a boyfriend. I was raised by servants. I don't even remember if I even had a dinner together with my family. What good is it to be rich anyway? I was raised neglected, and had no love. Sakura has been a very good friend, but she wouldn't understand the pain. I couldn't confide it to her. Maybe I could to Li-kun, but he wasn't lonely. He just missed the joys of childhood. I don't know. I couldn't find a good person to confide in, I kept it in. I used every ounce of my energy to convince others that I am fine and cheerful as always. This is to confusing, I must be boring you out of your mind Eriol," she explained. "No, I understand how you feel. Like you, I was raised by servants, neglected by my own family, and had no friends to confide in. Unlike you though, I had a lifetime of memories on my shoulder. Remembering spells and having Clow Reed's past, all this weight on me was unbearable. I created Spinel and Ruby Moon to keep me company. Recently you discovered of how much I cook and bake. It was kind of an excuse to not concentrate on the depression and loneliness I have. I guess you are not alone Tomoyo. I have felt your pain too," Eriol said. |