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SOUTH-WESTERN TOUR.

CHAPTER 1.

Having pushed "Anatolia" through the press, and shipped off to London for its contemporary publication there a set of stereotype plates, but without doing more towards its distribution than the supplying of the demands of a few friends in this city, we recommenced our annual runnings to and fro for the increase of knowledge in the dark places of the earth, by setting out on Lord’s day afternoon, June 3rd, for Newark, N.J., where appointments had been made for us to meet the people on that and the two following evenings, at the Washington Hall. Had it been announced through the papers that we should be accompanied by

A fiddling Greek,

And a learned pig,

Who Dutch could speak

As easy as’t could squeak;

or by some other kindred attraction, we should doubtless have rejoiced in a full house of the enlightened and discerning citizens of Newark; but having neither fiddle, Greek, nor porker, but only the predictions and doctrines of the Jewish old prophets and apostles to present before them, we had to regret that in this "Christian" city there were more empty seats than full ones. What does a money-making, prosperous community of sectarians care about Czarism, Mohammedanism, and Eastern Questions, seven thousand miles away, as accomplishing Jewish prophecies indited thirty or forty centuries ago! Will the knowledge of them increase the profits of their crafts, or multiply their "creature comforts?" Can they not get to heaven without troubling themselves with these? Why then incur the discomforts of warm weather, or the sacrifice of evening indolence to acquire it? Thus, God has spoken; but we found it a matter of indifference with the Newarkers as to what he has said! They seemed joined to their idols; why not, therefore, let them alone?

Some forty or fifty, I suppose, out of 30,000 people, did honour to themselves by coming to hear what God had spoken concerning these notable times. But whether they have become diligent searchers of the Scriptures in consequence, and less devoted to the things that perish, I know not. I have since heard that some of them would like to hear more upon the subjects treated of. Perhaps so. But it often happens that when an opportunity of doing so is afforded, such persons are among the missing! Circumstances at present are not at all encouraging in Newark. The clergy reign in triumphant ignorance of the truth, and the people love to have it so. Architecturally the city is improving, but spiritually it is dead and buried.

On Wednesday morning, June 6th, I left Newark by train for Baltimore, where I arrived about 6 P.M. Travelling express for Kentucky, I had no time to spend here; but pushed on for Wheeling, Va., by the 7 P.M. night train. By 2.20 minutes next day I was 580 miles from New York city. This was tolerably expeditious; but at Wheeling, expedition made a low bow and disappeared. It was possible to get to Cincinnati in ten hours, by a little staging; but not knowing this, we embarked upon a river boat. The water being low, the boat appointed to receive passengers was small and too confined for our company. The passage was tedious. The scenery, after seeing the Clyde, the Rhine, and the Hudson, is but little attractive; and whatever may be the improvement inland, I saw but little indicative of progress. The towns seem to be at a standstill, and the hills as wild as ever. However splendid and palatial the fitting up of the steamers, life upon the western rivers is decidedly low, being characterised by "liquoring," card-playing, trashy-publication-reading, swearing, and obscenity. To be cooped up in a small Ohio steamer with such is purgatory; and covers one with shame in seeing to what a degenerate race one belongs. For fifty-six long hours was I doomed to exist in this floating sepulchre; for we were all that time paddling 400 miles, with the stream in our favour!

The following incident on the way created a little interest while it lasted. Two passengers were talking on religion, one a Presbyterian, belonging to St. Louis; the other, a lay elder of a Lutheran church in Baltimore. They were talking about remission of sins through faith. I drew near and listened for a while; and at length ventured to make a sort of know-nothing inquiry as to what faith was. The Lutheran paused for a moment or two, and then gravely informed me that faith was the belief of what we did not understand! Then we have the remission of sins by the belief of what we don’t understand? "Yes." This faith is counted to us for righteousness? "Yes." I asked him many other questions about the gospel, the kingdom, heaven, hell, &c., which brought out his ignorance of all these topics as conspicuously as upon faith. I found him more rational upon the Eastern Question than upon any other subject. He declared his belief that this was the war that was to introduce the advent of Christ; and that the Autocrat would triumph over all the crazy thrones of Europe before that event. Where did you learn that Christ is to appear in person? It is the doctrine of Dr. Martin Luther. But what makes you think that the Autocrat will triumph? "Because every thing is rotten throughout the world, in trade, in commerce, in politics, and in religion. Things can go no further without breaking up; and the only strong man in the world is Nicholas. I believe, therefore, that the weak and corrupt will fall before him." Here was a man whose mind was evidently prepared for "Anatolia." He knew nothing of the prophets, but he had heard sermons in Germany about the end of the world, which had left a vague impression upon his mind that it was near. I showed him a copy of the work. He read the title with marked interest. He wished to have it; and for fifty cents obtained the first copy that appeared in the west.

Absurd as this man’s idea of faith is, it is nevertheless a correct one of the "faith" which is current in the Romish and Protestant communities—they assent to the truth of what they do not understand, as they happen to be led; and in proportion to their ignorance of the articles of their creeds is the tenacity with which they cleave to them. There is "mystery" in believing what you do not understand, and "Mystery" is stamped on the forefront of their abominations. The truth of this is easily tested by conversing with priests and people on their traditions about heaven, hell, trinity, immortality, justification, gospel, &c., upon all of which subjects, though so clearly unfolded in the sacred writings, they are as dark as the valley of the shadow of death in which they dwell.

We arrived at Cincinnati at 8 P.M., where we found the Alvin Adams, which had been telegraphed from Maysville, waiting to receive us. We left the wharf in this floating palace at 9 P.M., and arrived at Louisville, Kentucky, which is 150 miles from the Queen City, on Sunday morning at 8. 30. Ten years had passed since my sojourn at this place. It is said to be very much improved during that period. It may be so in parts I did not see. It is the terminus of a railroad, and many expensive houses have been erected. But from the water, and along the streets I traversed, it presents any thing but the neat and clean appearance of the towns in the Holland fatherland. A colony of Knickerbockers would certainly be a blessing to Louisville. They would cleanse the streets, set the house-painters to work, banish the hogs, lay the dust, and make the city sparkle in the sun. Their influence is swamped in the New Amsterdam of Manhattan by the Celts from papal Erin, who have for years reduced it to the filth of an Hibernian stye, in which chiels of Patrick O’Flanagan’s quiver, which is generally full, fraternise in hopeful equality with the family pig! A Knickerbocker municipality might redeem Louisville from dirt, and thus deliver it from cholera and other pestilences, which are the natural effects of the accumulation of filth in all the cities of the land. Cleanliness is said to be next to godliness; if so, godliness must be far removed. "Be clean," then, in extenso, and all filthiness of heart, and city, and person, will be put away: a clean heart, a clean city, and a clean person, are especially demanded in the divine law; generally they are neglected by mankind, and the consequence is obvious—God and they are far apart.

Though assured by the skipper of the boat that it would leave the wharf at 10 A.M., we did not leave our mooring till 5 P.M. Cursing, lying, and cheating, are the boat characteristics of the Ohio and Mississippi. They will say any thing for money. I have learned to discern the truth in the diametrics of their declarations. He knew well that we could not possibly get off at the time stated; for there were four steamers in the shallow ditch they call a canal, that connects Louisville with Portland below the Falls. But he lied to prevent us from leaving his boat and seeking another beyond the canal. If I could have come to a knowledge of the truth in the case, I might have spent some pleasant hours with some old friends in the City of Falls; as it was, I was obliged to confine myself to the boat, not knowing when it might be off. While waiting for this, a man died on board, and another fell overboard and was drowned. The latter incident caused a momentary excitement; but it was soon ascertained that it was only an Irish "deck-hand," and that he did not come up. His hat was caught, but no further effort made to recover him. He had gone without shrift or priest, but he would not be missed. His time had come, and as there were plenty more of the same sort, railroads, canals, and steamers could still be worked, and the world would save his keep! The incident was soon forgotten. When decomposition should set in, he would float; he would then be picked up and buried in the Potter’s Field. As to the other, said to have died from intoxication, he was taken off in a shell, but where to, nobody seemed to know or care. These seemed to be every-day occurrences. A stranger dies in a boat; he is forthwith nailed up in boards, and buried in the river bank: his effects, if no clue be found as to his abode, being duly appropriated for the trouble and expense of his interment. Thus goes the river world. "The living know that they must die, but the dead know not any thing;" but the living expect to die at home. Many a one goes west and never returns, nor is heard of any more. The statement made is oftentimes the reason. A stranger on the river is a fare—a pigeon to be plucked even when alive; who then is likely to care for the bird when dead? Let travellers remember this, and act accordingly.

At 5 P.M., we entered the Louisville and Portland Canal, which is about three miles in length. There was just about liquid mud enough to float the steamer, which was nearly as broad as the canal itself. The paddles threw the liquid under the boat astern, leaving her aground but for the inrush from ahead, which carried her backwards instead of forwards. The current from behind, however, would after a while turn back the liquid thrown astern, which, flowing under the boat, would raise her and float her on a few yards, until checked by the inrush from ahead. In this way the vessel edged along to and fro, gaining a little at every return of the slush, until after five hours we arrived at the end of this precious canal. Every department of the world’s affairs proclaims the necessity of the kingdom of God. Here is a canal that is a notorious abomination—in some stages of water utterly unfit for navigation; yet the boats that peril their way through it, crashing their wheels upon the rocks, are charged most extortionately, and as if it were the finest stream. Our steamer had to pay $170 for its five hours’ work through its ditch. When the world is governed righteously, such abominations will not be permitted for the benefit of stockholders and the State of Kentucky. It is said to be the best stock in the United States, and highly beneficial to Louisville! No doubt. The dues are enormous, and the expenses and accommodations trifling; and the barrier it proves to the navigation causes steamers to unload and store at Louisville, that, with a truly national canal, would pass on from Cincinnati to New Orleans and St. Louis, with only a touch and go at the Falls’ City on their way. But the time of the public and the interests of the whole upper river country are sacrificed to the acquisitiveness of commission merchants and the canal company. But travellers can only grumble at and groan under the impositions and miseries of the way; they cannot cure them. They are robbed of their time and cheated of their money without redress. I lost about eight days in a journey of about 3500 miles, which in these days of electricity and steam is not to be endured without much grumbling. This is all that travellers can do, and they generally exercise the right; for I heard the skipper say, "There never was a boat’s company but there were grumblers not a few." While travelling, however, whatever my dissatisfaction, I am careful not to identify myself with the few. The true philosophy is to endure patiently what you cannot cure; for in so doing the evil will be less. If a man find himself ensnared, let him get out as he best can, and be more vigilant for the future.

Thirty-two hours’ steaming brought us from Portland to Henderson, Kentucky. On landing, a Negro seized my baggage without question. I supposed he had been sent to meet me, so I followed in his wake. But his inquiry, "Where will you go mas’r?" gave me to know that I was not yet on the track of my friends. I inquired for several persons whom I knew only by name; but he could give me no satisfactory account of them. I then told him to take me to the best hotel in the place, where I expected I might get on their trail. He accordingly conducted me to the Taylor House, where I obtained the information sought. Arrangements had been made here for my conveyance to a friend’s house, some ten miles distant from the town. Having, therefore, breakfasted, written a letter, and dined, I was conveyed to my destination, where I arrived at the close of the afternoon of Tuesday, the 12th of June. Thus was concluded a tedious journey of 1342 miles, at a cost of $25.37½, and eight days. In "making a note on’t," as Capt. Cuttle says, I find the following: "It has been cool, with some rain; but is now turning warm. I have not had my clothes off since I left Newark, having passed the nights in cars and on steamboat floors, all the staterooms being occupied by previous comers, and many of them of the roughest sort in manner and speech; but the rule is, ‘first come, first served,’ so that decency and respectability are made to give place to ‘rowdies.’ Women are all ‘ladies;’ and no matter who they are, if they can pay the fare, (this being the ground of promotion,) all have the precedency at the table, and could oust from his seat, to make room for them, the President himself, if unprotected by a travelling companion of the sex! They eat with a rush, as though it were the last bite they would ever obtain. This applies to the whole menagerie of men, women, and children. As usual, I was the last at table. I could not keep pace with them, not being a beast of prey. The eating is not so good as on the Eastern boats, but between Cincinnati and Henderson pretty fair; good butter and bread; coffee, however, mere peas and chicory, having a little of the genuine for the sake of the name. But compared with Western steamboating, a traveller may truly sing, ‘Be it ever so homely, there’s no place like home.’"

EDITOR.

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