Anthony joins the Friar minor
When Fernando returned to the convent and he submitted his decision to the Prior, Father Egidio writhed his hands.
"In the name of God, Father Fernando! What you have decided is an authentic folly!
How can it be that you, who raised to such heights with your studies, who assimilated so much science, who is the pride and the boast of our community, want to leave us?
It is impossible! We will not accept, not I, neither the other Fathers. I do not want to say anything against the Friars minor of this Francis.
God can be served in many way as long as there is sincerity and justness.
I do not want to say anything…
However, it is magnificent to serve our Lord by rendering glorious His name in scholarly treatises and lessons. God has endowed you, Father, of extraordinary talents: science, lucidity of thought, eloquence.
You truly are the servant who, having received five talents, was able to yield another five. Instead those Friars… You are really like that servant who, having received the five talents, you are able to yield another five. And instead those others? No, I do not want to say anything wrong against them, may God be my witness. What would happen, nevertheless, if everyone would want to live like them? Life would die, the families would break, and the population would loose the new generations.
Wealth is dangerous for the soul. Not everyone however have to me ragged people. Who is going to give the alms, if everyone will extend their hands? No, no… Their behaviour reminds me to the teachings of those preachers rebel that praising poverty turned against the Church and its representatives. You have spoken more than once against them.
"It is true Father prior, I`ve done it. But today it seems to me that I was mistaken. They, although do not have any doctrine, have discovered the way that takes straight to God..."
"Do not speak like this. It is true that some of them have died as martyr. However, in all truth, their gesture was not free of folly... Wouldn`t it be more right to invite the infidels to an educated dispute? I would send you and you will win."
"God has preferred their blood!"
"You are feverish! Calm yourself, and you will see things differently."
"They have convinced me that God from us wants simplicity and renunciation, and not the doctrine that makes us vainglorious. Hasn’t Paul said: 'He, who believes to possess wisdom of this world, must become stupid. Only then he will become wise. The wisdom of this world is foolishness to the eyes of God...'
"Father Fernando, I will not try to compete with you in your knowledge of the Scripture... You know it better than me. But really... I have no more words... So, you really want to leave us?"
"Yes. I have decided so."
"And you want to go to those... those... Friars minor?"
"Yes"
"And haven’t you thought that by following your example others may want to imitate you?"
"If that will happen, it will be God’s will." Father Egidio collapsed heavily on the armchair as if he had been crushed by the threat of the words he had just heard. But he continued to ask:
"You want to renounce to all that you have? You want to walk without shoes, in a ragged habit, to work in exchange of a peace of bread?" He answered:
"I want it. But, above all, I want to offer my blood to God.
"I understand." He nodded with his head.
"You are dreaming to become a Saint. And don`t you think that he can conquer holiness in this Order?" In the question resounded the sourness. Fernando understood it. He knelt, he placed his hand on the chubby hand of the prior.
"It is God who can give holiness and one can conquer it everywhere. Even to shed the blood is not of any use if there is not God’s will. I will never cease to thank God for the moments that I spent in this monastery, for your guardianship over me, Father Prior, for the silence, for the possibility of looking for God in the books... Today however it seems to me that God is calling me to something new, of not known. I make this decision, eventhough I know that I will be meeting difficult things. If I will be able to withstand them, it will be thanks to what I found here... If it would happen that God one day will give me holiness, then thank him for it..."
That same night it was performed the ceremony of the entry of Fernando in the community of the Friars minor. Father Egidio, after having held counsel with the canonicals reached the persuasion that, seen that it was not possible to change Fernando`s decision, there was a need to carry out the passage from one to the other community as quickly as possible, before anyone else would find out.
All the canonicals regretted the leaving of Fernando, both because he was an erudite, and also because of his affiliation of one of the big families of the kingdom, especially since the Buglione had stopped to be resentful with the congregation for having removed their brother from their family; and they looked with a more benevolent eye the canonicals because of Fernando’s increasing fame.
It was decided that the passage to the Friar minor should have happened in a hurry and secretly. In hurryness was marked by another fact. The season was hot, it was in the first few days of July. The regal court had left the city, looking for refreshment of the head in the shores of the ocean. The queen that lavished her favours to the monastery of the Saint Cross manifested quite a lot of benevolence also towards the Friars minor, particularly by the epoch of the martyrdom of Berardo and his friends. In case she wanted to meddle with the matter, there would have been several complications. There was the need to take advantage of her absence.
It was late in the evening when the six Friars from Olivares arrived. They brought Fernando a habit, without the hood (he would have received the hood after a period of trial), a rope and some awkward sandals, built by them, because Friar Simao had thought that Fernando, not being accustomed of going barefoot, would find it difficult to walk. The Church was closed, so that no one would participate to the ceremony. There were only the Friars minor and the canonicals dressed in white.
Fernando after having recited his prayer undressed of his white habit and gave it to the prior. Once again he thanked him from his heart for all the good that he had received from the monastery. Then by now dressed in his ragged habit repeated with Friar Simao the words of the promise. The vow of poverty was very rigorous. Already in precedence Fernando had given the books that he owned to the canonical, and the money and the clothing to the poor. He had to go without taking anything with himself. He wasn’t able to imagine with clarity how his new life was going to be without having anything; nevertheless it continued to persist in him a feverish enthusiasm that allowed him not to think of what would have been. Besides he believed that in a few months there would have been the consent from the Minister in Spain and he could have gone to the Saracens.
It was also rigorous the vow of obedience that it was imposed to him to declare towards the Pontif, towards Friar Francis and towards his immediate religious superior.
The obligation of absolute obedience towards Francis aroused in his heart a deaf rebellion. Despite the change, which happened to him, the aversion towards the founder of the order had remained. His will was fighting with wrathful thought: why this person must be the absolute master of my life? Although he had accepted the ideal, he wasn’t able to accept he deviser.
Nevertheless he declared the vow with the determination that he would have been faithful. After all he was convinced that in his life he would never meet Francis. As soon as he would have the permission, he would leave to share the doom of Berardo.
After having declared his vows, when he assumed the aspect of the Friars: in the rough habit, that irritated his skin, and in the heavy sandals that gripped his feet and bothered him more than if he was barefoot on the church floor, he raised his hand to indicate that he wanted to say something. The Friars minor surrounded him, expressing nosily their joy patting him on his shoulders. He bore unwillingly their gestures, their laughters, and their shouts. Seeing his raised hand they stepped back and fell silent.
"Listen, Friars" he said, "Now that you have accepted me, allow me to pray you for another thing. Not everyone does it, but I heard that Friar Francis imposed a new name to the person who wanted to cut off with his previous life. Because of this I want that Fernando Buglione will die tonight."
"And what would you like to be called?"
"If it is okay with you, allow me to call myself Anthony. The Chapel of Olivares is dedicated to that Saint hermit. The books say that he in the desert born terrible temptations, sent to him by Satan and that only with the help of God he was able to get over them. I had my own temptations in my life, and I don`t doubt that there will be others, maybe every stronger. I would like the protection of this Saint to accompany me in these difficult moments. Are you agreable Friar?"
"With all my heart, Friar. May God bless you and may the Holiest Mother and Saint Anthony hermit protect you in every necessity. From this moment we will call you Anthony."
Once again the Friars minor made a hoop around him, once again with exclamations and slaps expressed their joy. Above the friars` heads he saw the face of the Prior round as a full moon. Even Father Egidio was smiling. It had been him to suggest to Fernando, during their last conversation, that he may have to change his name, seeing that he was changing order.
Since it was inevitable to loose a so promising religious, there was the need to loose him in a total way, so that the furthering wouldn’t be noticed and more important that he would have dragged imitators.
Once summer had gone and the regal court would have re-entered in Coimbra, the new Friar minor would have been quite far away…
Chapter 9
That same night it was performed the ceremony of the entry of Fernando in the community of the Friars minor. Father Egidio, after having held counsel with the canonicals reached the persuasion that, seen that it was not possible to change Fernando`s decision, there was a need to carry out the passage from one to the other community as quickly as possible, before anyone else would find out.
When Fernando returned to the convent and he submitted his decision to the Prior, Father Egidio writhed his hands.
"In the name of God, Father Fernando! What you have decided is an authentic folly!
How can it be that you, who raised to such heights with your studies, who assimilated so much science, who is the pride and the boast of our community, want to leave us?
It is impossible! We will not accept, not I, neither the other Fathers. I do not want to say anything against the Friars minor of this Francis.
God can be served in many way as long as there is sincerity and justness.
I do not want to say anything…
However, it is magnificent to serve our Lord by rendering glorious His name in scholarly treatises and lessons. God has endowed you, Father, of extraordinary talents: science, lucidity of thought, eloquence.
You truly are the servant who, having received five talents, was able to yield another five. Instead those Friars… You are really like that servant who, having received the five talents, you are able to yield another five. And instead those others? No, I do not want to say anything wrong against them, may God be my witness. What would happen, nevertheless, if everyone would want to live like them? Life would die, the families would break, and the population would loose the new generations.
Wealth is dangerous for the soul. Not everyone however have to me ragged people. Who is going to give the alms, if everyone will extend their hands? No, no… Their behaviour reminds me to the teachings of those preachers rebel that praising poverty turned against the Church and its representatives. You have spoken more than once against them.
"It is true Father prior, I`ve done it. But today it seems to me that I was mistaken. They, although do not have any doctrine, have discovered the way that takes straight to God..."
"Do not speak like this. It is true that some of them have died as martyr. However, in all truth, their gesture was not free of folly... Wouldn`t it be more right to invite the infidels to an educated dispute? I would send you and you will win."
"God has preferred their blood!"
"You are feverish! Calm yourself, and you will see things differently."
"They have convinced me that God from us wants simplicity and renunciation, and not the doctrine that makes us vainglorious. Hasn’t Paul said: 'He, who believes to possess wisdom of this world, must become stupid. Only then he will become wise. The wisdom of this world is foolishness to the eyes of God...'
"Father Fernando, I will not try to compete with you in your knowledge of the Scripture... You know it better than me. But really... I have no more words... So, you really want to leave us?"
"Yes. I have decided so."
"And you want to go to those... those... Friars minor?"
"Yes"
"And haven’t you thought that by following your example others may want to imitate you?"
"If that will happen, it will be God’s will." Father Egidio collapsed heavily on the armchair as if he had been crushed by the threat of the words he had just heard. But he continued to ask:
"You want to renounce to all that you have? You want to walk without shoes, in a ragged habit, to work in exchange of a peace of bread?" He answered:
"I want it. But, above all, I want to offer my blood to God.
"I understand." He nodded with his head.
"You are dreaming to become a Saint. And don`t you think that he can conquer holiness in this Order?" In the question resounded the sourness. Fernando understood it. He knelt, he placed his hand on the chubby hand of the prior.
"It is God who can give holiness and one can conquer it everywhere. Even to shed the blood is not of any use if there is not God’s will. I will never cease to thank God for the moments that I spent in this monastery, for your guardianship over me, Father Prior, for the silence, for the possibility of looking for God in the books... Today however it seems to me that God is calling me to something new, of not known. I make this decision, eventhough I know that I will be meeting difficult things. If I will be able to withstand them, it will be thanks to what I found here... If it would happen that God one day will give me holiness, then thank him for it..."
All the canonicals regretted the leaving of Fernando, both because he was an erudite, and also because of his affiliation of one of the big families of the kingdom, especially since the Buglione had stopped to be resentful with the congregation for having removed their brother from their family; and they looked with a more benevolent eye the canonicals because of Fernando’s increasing fame.
It was decided that the passage to the Friar minor should have happened in a hurry and secretly. In hurryness was marked by another fact. The season was hot, it was in the first few days of July. The regal court had left the city, looking for refreshment of the head in the shores of the ocean. The queen that lavished her favours to the monastery of the Saint Cross manifested quite a lot of benevolence also towards the Friars minor, particularly by the epoch of the martyrdom of Berardo and his friends. In case she wanted to meddle with the matter, there would have been several complications. There was the need to take advantage of her absence.
It was late in the evening when the six Friars from Olivares arrived. They brought Fernando a habit, without the hood (he would have received the hood after a period of trial), a rope and some awkward sandals, built by them, because Friar Simao had thought that Fernando, not being accustomed of going barefoot, would find it difficult to walk. The Church was closed, so that no one would participate to the ceremony. There were only the Friars minor and the canonicals dressed in white.
Fernando after having recited his prayer undressed of his white habit and gave it to the prior. Once again he thanked him from his heart for all the good that he had received from the monastery. Then by now dressed in his ragged habit repeated with Friar Simao the words of the promise. The vow of poverty was very rigorous. Already in precedence Fernando had given the books that he owned to the canonical, and the money and the clothing to the poor. He had to go without taking anything with himself. He wasn’t able to imagine with clarity how his new life was going to be without having anything; nevertheless it continued to persist in him a feverish enthusiasm that allowed him not to think of what would have been. Besides he believed that in a few months there would have been the consent from the Minister in Spain and he could have gone to the Saracens.
It was also rigorous the vow of obedience that it was imposed to him to declare towards the Pontif, towards Friar Francis and towards his immediate religious superior.
The obligation of absolute obedience towards Francis aroused in his heart a deaf rebellion. Despite the change, which happened to him, the aversion towards the founder of the order had remained. His will was fighting with wrathful thought: why this person must be the absolute master of my life? Although he had accepted the ideal, he wasn’t able to accept he deviser.
Nevertheless he declared the vow with the determination that he would have been faithful. After all he was convinced that in his life he would never meet Francis. As soon as he would have the permission, he would leave to share the doom of Berardo.
After having declared his vows, when he assumed the aspect of the Friars: in the rough habit, that irritated his skin, and in the heavy sandals that gripped his feet and bothered him more than if he was barefoot on the church floor, he raised his hand to indicate that he wanted to say something. The Friars minor surrounded him, expressing nosily their joy patting him on his shoulders. He bore unwillingly their gestures, their laughters, and their shouts. Seeing his raised hand they stepped back and fell silent.
"Listen, Friars" he said, "Now that you have accepted me, allow me to pray you for another thing. Not everyone does it, but I heard that Friar Francis imposed a new name to the person who wanted to cut off with his previous life. Because of this I want that Fernando Buglione will die tonight."
"And what would you like to be called?"
"If it is okay with you, allow me to call myself Anthony. The Chapel of Olivares is dedicated to that Saint hermit. The books say that he in the desert born terrible temptations, sent to him by Satan and that only with the help of God he was able to get over them. I had my own temptations in my life, and I don`t doubt that there will be others, maybe every stronger. I would like the protection of this Saint to accompany me in these difficult moments. Are you agreable Friar?"
"With all my heart, Friar. May God bless you and may the Holiest Mother and Saint Anthony hermit protect you in every necessity. From this moment we will call you Anthony."
Once again the Friars minor made a hoop around him, once again with exclamations and slaps expressed their joy. Above the friars` heads he saw the face of the Prior round as a full moon. Even Father Egidio was smiling. It had been him to suggest to Fernando, during their last conversation, that he may have to change his name, seeing that he was changing order.
Since it was inevitable to loose a so promising religious, there was the need to loose him in a total way, so that the furthering wouldn’t be noticed and more important that he would have dragged imitators.
Once summer had gone and the regal court would have re-entered in Coimbra, the new Friar minor would have been quite far away…
