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The Forever Decision

 Thinking thoughts so insane,
Waging this war in my head.
Standing here in the rain,
Wishing this would all stop
And I'd finally feel no pain.

All day I live with this mask-
Smiling and laughing throughout my days,
While wondering how long this can last.
Finally, the cover falls
As the night falls fast.

The war rages on throughout the night.
The body becoming the battlefield,
The soul determined to fight.
Red forever stains this night,
I'm slowly losing my sight.

Darkness descends over my eyes,
The light I can no longer see.
I'm caught within these lies,
No where to turn, no where to run-
It's time to say my goodbye's

The forever decision
That I'm about to make
Shows my clouded vision
And that I can no longer cope-
I make my final incision.

Left alone to die,
Just as I was alone alive.
I do not wonder why;
My life has no meaning,
Nothing left to do but sigh.

It's all over and done,
I cannot turn back now.
My darkness has won-
I give in, I give up,
I can no longer run.

As dawn nears, I begin to fade.
I've already lived life too much,
The debt I've finally paid,
And I am finally at peace
With the forever decision that I've made.