The Myth of the A.D.D Child:
50 Ways to Improve Your Child's Behavior and Attention Span Without Drugs, Labels, or Coercion

The author, Thomas Armstrong, says,"  The book does NOT say there are no hyper kids I would like the readers to know that my book does NOT say that there are no distractible, hyperactive, or impulsive kids out there. Rather, it argues that the ADD/ADHD concept is not  helpful in understanding these behaviors, and gets in the way of our appreciating the wholeness of each child. I also am not against medication of kids in certain situations, but believe that parents have a right to know the full range of non-drug options that are available for helping their  "attention-different" kids achieve success in life. "  Over the past ten years, attention deficit disorder (ADD) or attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) has emerged from the relative obscurity of cognitive psychologists’ research laboratories to become the "disease du jour" of America’s schoolchildren. Accompanying this popularity has been a virtually complete acceptance of the validity of this "disorder" by scientists, physicians, psychologists, educators, parents, and others.

Upon closer critical scrutiny, however, there is much to be troubled about concerning ADD/ADHD as a real medical diagnosis. There is no definitive objective set of criteria to determine who has ADD/ADHD and who does not. Rather, instead, there are a loose set of behaviors (hyperactivity, distractibility, and impulsivity) that combine in different ways to give rise to the "disorder."

These behaviors are highly context-dependent. A child may be hyperactive while seated at a desk doing a boring worksheet, but not  necessarily while singing in a school musical. These behaviors are also very general in nature and give no clue as to their real origins. A child can be hyperactive because he’s bored, depressed, anxious, allergic to milk, creative, a hands-on learner, has a difficult temperament, is stressed out, is driven by a media-mad culture, or any number of other  possible causes.

The tests that have been used to determine if someone has ADD/ADHD are either artificially objective and remote from the lives of real children (in one test, a child is asked to press a button every time he sees a 1 followed by a 9 on a computer screen) , or hopelessly subjective (many rating scales ask parents and teachers to score a child’s behavior on a scale from 1 to 5: these scores depend upon the subjective attitudes more than the actual behaviors of the children involved).

The treatments used for this supposed disorder are also problematic. Ritalin use is up 500% over the past six years, yet it does not cure the problem, it only masks symptoms, and  there are several disadvantages: children don’t like taking it, children use it as an "excuse" for their behavior ("I hit Ed because I forgot to take my pill."), and there are some indications it may be related to later substance abuse of drugs like cocaine.

Behavior modification programs used for kids labeled ADD/ADHD work, but they don’t  help kids become better learners. In fact, they may interfere with the development of a child’s intrinsic love of learning (kids behave simply to get more rewards), they may frustrate some kids (when they don’t get expected rewards), and they can also impair  creativity and stifle cooperation.

ADD/ADHD is a popular diagnosis in the 1990’s because it serves as a neat way to explain away the complexities of turn-of-the-millenium life in America. Over the past few decades, our families have broken up, respect for authority has eroded, mass media has created a "short-attention-span culture," and stress levels have skyrocketed. When our children start to act out under the strain, it’s convenient to create a scientific-sounding  term to label them with, an effective drug to stifle their "symptoms," and a whole program of ADD/ADHD workbooks, videos, and instructional materials to use to fit them in a box that relieves parents and teachers of any worry that it might be due to their own failure (or the failure of the broader culture) to nurture or teach effectively.

Mainly, the ADD/ADHD label is a tragic decoy that takes the focus off of where it’s needed most: the real life of  each unique child. Instead of seeing each child for who he or she is (strengths,  limitations, interests, temperaments, learning styles etc.) and addressing his or her  specific needs, the child is reduced to an "ADD child," where the potential to see the best in him or her is severely eroded (since ADD/ADHD puts all the emphasis on the deficits, not the strengths), and where the number of potential solutions to help them is  highly limited to a few child-controlling interventions.

Instead of this deficit-based ADD/ADH paradigm, I’d like to suggest a wellness-based  holistic paradigm that sees each child in terms of his or her ultimate worth, and addresses each child’s unique needs. To do this, we need to provide a wide range of options for parents or teachers.

50 Ways to Improve Your Child’s Behavior and Attention Span without Drugs, Labels, or Coercion For detailed information about each way, see The Myth of the ADD Child  book
 

Provide a balanced breakfast.	Consider the Feingold diet	Limit television and video games
Teach self-talk skills.	Find out what interests your child.	Promote a strong physical education program in your child’s school.
Enroll your child in a martial arts program.	Discover your child’s multiple intelligences (link)	Use background music to focus and calm.
Use color to highlight information.	Teach your child to visualize.	Remove allergens from the diet.
Provide opportunities for physical movement.	Enhance your child’s self-esteem.	Find your child’s best times of alertness.
Give instructions in attention-grabbing ways.	Provide a variety of stimulating learning activities.	Consider biofeedback training.
Activate positive career aspirations.	Teach your child physical-relaxation techniques.	Use incidental learning to teach.
Support full inclusion of your child in a regular classroom.	Provide positive role models.	Consider alternative schooling options.
Channel creative energy into the arts.	Provide hands-on activities	Spend positive times together.
Provide appropriate spaces for learning.	Consider individual psychotherapy.	Use touch to soothe and calm.
Help your child with organizational skills.	Help your child appreciate the value of personal effort.	Take care of yourself.
Teach your child focusing techniques.	Provide immediate feedback.	Provide your child with access to a computer.
Consider family therapy.	Teach problem-solving skills.	Offer your child real-life tasks to do.
Use "time-out" in a positive way.	Help your child develop social skills.	Contract with your child.
Use effective communication skills.	Give your child choices.	Discover the treatment for the four types of misbehavior.
Establish consistent rules, routines, and transitions.	Hold family meetings.	Have your child teach a younger child.
Use natural and logical consequences.	Hold a positive image of your child.

Parents' Positive Tips For Dealing With Professionals
by an ADHD Gazette Reader, reproduced her with her permission

Sorry I've been a bit slow getting round to it. It's not that I'm chicken,well alright, I am a bit. They are kinda my own little secret weapon and I feel weird telling other people.... These really are just notes to myself, and things which help me and kind of psyche me up and make me feel more able to cope and less intimidated. But they may not be the things that would help other people... I dunno.  Either way, If I pass them on maybe someone else can add stuff, so here goes...

As I said it starts off with a sheet with  "I will no longer be the victim..... I am here to get help for my son.... I am not here to win any popularity contest..... if they think I'm difficult, nasty, neurotic etc, that's irrelevant..... what's important is that I act on behalf on my son and make them aware of his needs and his problems."

Other sheets are made up with shortened versions of some of the points below... I find the shorter and snappier the easier they are to remember.... Like for the first one SLOW I'd just put SLOW  - No need to jabber! etc.

BRAVADO    They don't know how scared you are! It doesn't show! Act brave and assertive and that's what they'll see! So you're still shaking like a jelly inside, but pretend you aren't!  Guess what? After a while you even start to believe it yourself!

FEAR? ANXIETY - NOT necessarily all bad because they produce adrenaline which prepares you for the fight!  So feel good about being nervous!!! and USE that adrenaline!  (So no need to keep putting off meetings which you dread! You wouldn't want to waste that adrenaline)

PERSISTENCE    Along with calm, state your point of view calmly but very firmly and assertively... you are entitled to hold a view. Its YOURS and they may not agree with it or like it but it's as valid as anyone else's.

DON'T EXPLAIN    State your case!  Plainly and as simply as possible. Give examples if it helps... BUT NEVER, EVER feel you have to justify yourself, or your feelings and concerns for your child. You're supposed to fight for your child.. that's what Mum's are for!

PERSONAL ATTACK    If they stoop to personal attack or abuse, don't get caught up in it, it'll distract you from the reason you are there.  Say," I don't feel that's relevant or 'that's as maybe but......then go back to the point.

SIDE-TRACKED    Like above, don't allow them to side-track you into discussing something else. I think they do this on purpose... then all of a sudden you've run out of time, the meeting's over and you haven't said half the things you wanted to. If you can let them go on for a little while then leap in with something more relevant to bring it back on track.

LISTEN    More than you talk!  You will learn more, also if you save your words, and use them wisely/sparingly - they'll have more impact!  They are more likely to get the point too if it's not lost amongst waffle. PLUS, it's unnerving for them!

PRAISE/CONCILIATION    Alright, so you don't want to seem the aggressor, but that doesn't mean you have to go along with what they say. Don't be afraid to disagree! If you do it right, and are calm and polite but insistent then you are perfectly reasonable to do so. Like wise with praise, guard it and use it only carefully where entirely warranted, otherwise they may use it against you! (Very cynical that; sorry. Learnt the hard way, tried to be reasonable and get in their good books, they used it against me and said Oh but Mrs G said that.....)

EVADE    Never, let yourself be pressured into making promises or decisions you can't keep or haven't fully considered the consequences of.  Say I need time to think about that, and can I get back to you on that, or outright say.. I can't make that kind of decision on the spot.

SAY IT AGAIN SAM!     If they've said something that's out of order (all the time!) and nasty,  rather than getting upset and in a rage... get them to repeat it.. chances are they won't an bill backtrack.  i.e. say, 'so what you're saying is..' or 'are you suggesting that...'  or 'I'm sorry I don't understand what you mean by that..'

REITERATE       If they don't seem to be getting the message, or don't want to...or try to side-track. Keep on saying it over and over, can repeat it straight or change perspective slightly but either way DON'T let them lose the point of you being there.

QUESTION    Most of us are afraid to question those we suppose are above us, BUT unless you ask them outright or direct questions, you can't find out what's really going on. Otherwise a lot of beating around the bush goes on and at the end of it you are none the wiser and still are in the dark as to what they are really up to.. i.e.. do you come out, and feel I wonder
what they meant by that?  Next time, stop them and actually ASK!  Besides which it often embarrasses them when they try to explain because more often than not their slant on things tends to seem petty and unreasonable when it's actually spelt out in the open!

ANTI-NEGATIVE    If they insist on saying really negative remarks about your child.. try taking them and throwing them back with either the question/repeat above or else reframe them, i.e. 'he's so stubborn...' you say 'yes he can be determined...' Alright it's hard but try!

DISAGREE    It IS OK to disagree!  But do it so that it looks like it's them that are being the unreasonable ones!  Say, 'that's most regrettable that you think that way...' or 'I'm sorry that we can't seem to reach an agreement..'  That way invariably they'll be the one's to switch track and try to compromise.

IF ALL ELSE FAILS - LEAVE!  DON'T EVER hang around when you're on a loser! If you've tried your best and still can't convince them - thing's will just get worse from there on, and usually it ends up with them trying to lay all the blame on you!  If it's really bad, just go... you don't have to take it... otherwise try 'I think you've made you're position clear.  We will certainly think very carefully about what you have said..'  THAT REALLY SCARES THEM!  What's she going to do?

I think that'll do for now if anyone's still with me after all this :-) well done,I'll leave it there... but you get the idea...  Pick a few and write them down as a kind of pep talk to yourself.    Exhausted - KG

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