FOR MAMA
REAL MOTHERS
Real Mothers don't eat quiche: they don't have time to make it.
Real Mothers know their kitchen utensils are probably in the sandbox.
Real Mothers often have sticky floors, filthy ovens and happy kids.
Real Mothers know that dried Paydough doesn't come out of shag carpets.
Real Mothers don't want to know what the vacuum just sucked up!
Real Mothers sometimes ask, "Why Me?" and get their answer when
a little voice says, "Because I love you best!"
Real Mothers know that a child's growth is not measured by height,
or years or grade.
It is marked by the progression of
Mama to Mommy to Mom.....
WHAT MOM TAUGHT ME
My mother taught me
TO APPRRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE -
"if you're going to kill
each other, do it outside - I just finished cleaning."
My mother taught me RELIGION
"you better pray that will come out of the carpet"
My mother taught me
about TIME TRAVEL -
"If you don't straighten up,
I'm going to throw you into the middle of next week."
My mother taught me LOGIC -
"Because I said so, that's why"
My mother taught me FORESIGHT -
"Make sure you wear clean underwear,
in case you're in an accident."
My mother taught me IRONY
"keep laughing and I'll 'give' you
something to cry about."
My mother taught me
about the science of OSMOSIS -
"Shut your mouth and
eat your supper."
My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM
"Will you look at the dirt on
the back of your neck."
My mother taught me about STAMINA
"You'll sit there until all that
spinach is finished."
My mother taught me about WEATHER
"It looks as if a tornado swept
through your room."
My mother taught be me how solve PHYSICS PROBLEMS
"if I yelled because I saw
a meteor coming toward you would you listen then?"
My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY
"If I've told you once, I've told you
a million times - don't exaggerate!"
My mother taught me about the CIRCLE OF LIFE
"I brought you into this world,
and I can take you out."
My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION
"Stop acting like your father."
My mother taught me about ENVY
"There are millions of less fortunate children
in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do!"
THANKS MOM!!!!
PATTY'S HOMEPAGE
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