Veroni: Let's get back to work, guys!

(The Cats slog in after the rather lengthy break between parts)

Veroni: And dare I ask where you all have been?

Munku: Sleeping off catnip from Matt's "Hair" parody.

Veroni: (groans) Oh no. Just my luck you guys are in hangover land and we have some very dramatic scenes coming up.

Misto: I think it'll put a groovy new spin on things.

Veroni: "Groovy". Uh-huh... Well, how was your nap time?

Tumble: Once the colors stopped flashing past my eyes I woke up in a bus depot.

Veroni: And did you learn a lesson about catnip?

Tumble: Never get high unless you want to wake up next to a 400 pound wino who wants to wash your fur.

Veroni: And the amazing part? About 20% of that was actual "moral".

(Let's see if we can re-create the 1770's atmosphere, shall we?)

Mungo: Righteous!

(Well, we'll just continue the story.... The message delivered by the courier is, in a nutshell, a rather dismal report from General Washington on the condition of the army and the approach of a rather substantial platoon of Brit soldiers. This causes the former soldier, Colonel MunKean to protest having such a gloomy man in charge of their troops.)

Mungo: Mr. P-r-r-r-r-resident! Surely we 'ave promoted da gl-l-l-l-loomiest man to da 'ead o' our troops!

Skimble: OH MAKE HIM STOP!!! The combination of his Cockney and a ROTTEN attempt at a Scottish accent is makin' ma ears hurt!

Rumpus: COLONEL MUNKEAN, PLEASE!!!!

Mungo: Wha'?

Rumpus: It's too hot.

Kittens: **hee hee** And all the hot air Mungo is blowin' is making it worse!!

Mungo: Kittens! Sheesh!

Rumpus: General Washington will continue to phrase his dispatches as he so pleases, and for now all we can hope is that he finds more cheerful thoughts to convey in the near (swats at a fly, making a loud bang on the desktop) future.

(Suddenly, a loud cry is heard out in the streets. It is Tuggard Henry Lee, who has returned with the promised resolution on Independance.)

Tugger: (comes in and trips on a few background cats on his way to the President's desk, center stage.) Mr. **thunk** Whoops! My bad! President! I have returned with the following-- Sorry! Didn't see you there-- resolution from the great colony of-- You should put some ice on that-- VIRGINIA!!

Veroni: And if you readers out there were able to follow the actual dialogue, I have no idea how you did it....

Tugger: (clears throat and makes a big production of reading a little piece of paper) "Resolved that these united colonies have the right to, and EVERY RIGHT ought to be, FREE and independant states! And that our association with the Brittish crown should... AND OUGHTTA BE... totally disolved!"

Misto: (pops head up) I second the motion!

Mac: (pushes Misto out of the way-- hard)

Misto: I will assume you were just trying to follow the script there.

Mac: Mr. President! I move that the question of Independance should be postponed.... INDEFINATELY.

(The other Pennsylvanian delegate-- Mr. James Quaxen-- stands)

Quaxo: I second the motion!

Rumpus: Mr. Quaxen, in your eagerness to be loved, you seem to have forgotten that Pennsylvania CAN NOT SECOND ITS OWN MOTION!!

Quaxo: Great. I play the guy who hides in Macavity's shadow all show long?

Bomb: Why not? You so eagerly follow everyone's lead in everything else...

Tugger: And what pray tell, is THAT supposed to mean?

Bomb: (singing under her breath) "Whatever Bomba wants.... Bomba gets.... And little tom, little Bomba... wants you..."

Pounce: (still clearly strung out from "Hair") She sings PURDY!!!

Veroni: (rolls eyes)

(The motion is soon seconded and a vote is taken.... "Yea" to proceed with the debate, and "Nay" to postpone the question of independence-- indefinately. New Hampshire and Massachusettes both vote Yea, and things are looking good. )

Plato: Mr. Guspkins of Rhode Island? (no answer) McNair? Where's Rhode Island?

Pounce: Rhode Island is out visitin' the necessary.

Tugger: Read-- potty.

Rumpus: After what Rhode Island has consumed, I'm not surprised. Continue on without him. We'll come back... proceed.

Plato: Rhode Island passes.

(A great roar of scripted laughter errupts upon this line, but goes on for A HECK OF A LOT LONGER than intended.)

Plato: (turning red) It wasn't THAT funny.

Tugger: *hah!* Oh yes it *snort** was!!

(Connecticut votes Yea. Next the vote comes to New York, which abstains for reasons yet to be revealed...)

Tugger: But it's a pretty pathetic excuse if you ask me.

Veroni: Tug? NO FORESHADOWING!!!

(Next comes New Jersey, which is STILL absent, so they skip ahead to Pennsylvania-- which votes Nay. Deleware next...)

Victor: (whose character is fatally ill with cancer--- this plays heavilly later, so yes, it WAS important that you know that wee bit of info) Deleware as ever FOR independance, votes Yea.

(Quick action brush over since I really want to get to another song here before I hit 80..... Maryland votes Nay, Virginia votes Yea, both Carolinas vote Nay and Georgia votes Nay. Tied, they call Mr. Guspkins from the little room so he can cast his vote.)

Plato: We're waiting on you, Mr. Guspkins.

Gus: **hic** You'd think the congress would have it's own **hic** privvy.

Tugger: Yet another antiquated term for the john.

(In short, Guspkins votes Yea and the debate begins.... leading into a tense standoff between Adams-- the poster child for Independance, and Dickenson-- the poster child for staying linked with Brittain. They get into such a fight that eventually, the shouting match turns into a hand to hand fight, quickly broken up by Victor.)

Victor: STOP IT!! THIS IS THE CONGRESS!! There's no time for this!! The enemy is out there....

Mac: No, Mr. Rodney! The enemy is in here! Adams and Massachusettes!!

Victor: NO! It's England closing in! Cutting off our air..... (gasps with the pain of the cancer) No air...

(Victor is sent home, sick and on the verge of death--- how's that for a plot twist? When Victor departs, the third Deleware delegate: Asparagus Read, is quick to motion that the Deleware vote is now Nay and that Independance should be voted on NOW. Mistohn knows that the vote would now be stacked against him, so he wracks his brain for some delay tactic.)

Misto: (speaks quickly, without thinking) How can we vote on this without a statement of some kind? You know, to declare to the world exactly why we have chosen to sever our ties? A declaration of some sort....

Backstage Cats: DECLARATION OF INDEPENDANCE, YA BOOB!!!

Veroni: As we shatter the historical setting into itty bitty pieces....

(The resolution to develop a Declaration of Independance is seconded by Bustopher Franklin, and the congress ajourns after selecting a Declaration committee comprised of-- Mistohn Adams, (duh) Bustopher Franklin, Munkas Jefferson (who protests heartily at being held up from going home to be with is wife), Roger Skimbleman and Coribert Livingston.)

Veroni: And guess what? There's a SONG here!!!

Tugger: REALLY? I thought you either forgot about them or this was quickly turning into a straight play.

Veroni: So sue me! It was a long section of dialogue!!

Misto: Alright gentletoms, let's get on with it. Who will write our declaration on independance?

Bustopher: (sings) Mr. Adams, I say YOU should write it!

To your legal minded brilliance we deferr.

Misto: Well, if I'm the one to do it,

They'll run that quill pen through it!

I'm obnoxious and disliked

You know that, sir?

Mac: FINALLY! He agrees with me about himself!!

Misto: I am NOT obnoxious and disliked!!

Vicky: (sarcastically) Oh, no. Misto's not disliked! He only does that dance no one else in the cast can do!!

Lec: You should talk, Vic. You and your: "Oh so flexible am I" routine!!

(The kittens hiss and start taking swipes at each other. They would have connected too, if it weren't for Jellylorum who quickly scooped up Vicky, and Jennyanydots, who got her paws around Electra. The result is two squirming kittens kicking madly.)

Misto: (tries to pick up where he left off) So I say you should write it, Franklin! Yes you!

Bustopher: Heck, no!

Misto: Yes, you Mr. Franklin! Yes you!

Bustopher: But---

Misto: YOU!

Bustopher: But--

Misto: YOU!

Bustopher: Buuuuuuuuut---

Mr. Adams, but Mr. Adams

The things I write are only light extemporania!

I won't put politics on paper, it's a mania!

So I refuse to use a pen in Pennsylvania!

Munku, Cori and Skimble: Pennsylvania!

Pennsylvania!

Refuse to use the pe-en!!

Misto: (trying again) Mr. Skimbleman, I say YOU should write it!

You are never controversial, as it were.

Skimble: That is true...

Misto: Whereas, if I'm the one to do it,

They'll run their quill pens through it!

I'm obnoxious and disliked,

You know that sir!

Skimble: Yes I do.

(They go around with the same section of "Yes" "No" singing.)

Cats: Which you'll skip because it gets really monotonous??!!

Veroni: No. I love this song, but I knew YOU guys would start getting antsy.

Pounce: (still strung out, kisses her) Ya are a SAINT!!! (collapses) Huh!! Huh!! I see pretty colors!!

Veroni: Next time I see Matt----

Skimble: BUT!! Mr. Adams, dear Mr. Adams!

I cannot write with any style or proper etiquette!

I do not know a participle from a predicate!

I am just a simple cobbler from Connecticut!

Bustopher, Cori and Munku: Connecticut!! Connecticut!

A simple cobbler he!

Bustopher: Cobbler? What kind? Peach? Ooooo! I love peach cobbler!!

(Misto NEXT approaches Coribert Livingston from New York.)

Cori: But Mr. Adams! But Mr. Adams!

I've been presented with a new son by the noble stork!

So I am going home celebrate and pop the cork

With all the Livingstons together back in old New York!

Bustopher, Skimble and Munku: New---

Cats: We know, we know! (speaks through it quickly) "New York, New York.." and something about popping the cork.

Veroni: That predictable, huh?

Cats: YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSS!!!!

(He next approaches Munkas Jefferson.)

Misto: Mr. Jefferson...

Munku: (sings) Mr. Adams, LEAVE ME ALONE!!!

(They debate--- and who would you suppose wins? Okay, dumb question seeing as how there is a United States of America today.)

Misto: Mr. Jefferson, DEAR Mr. Jefferson

I'm only 41, I still have my verillity!

And I can run through Cupid's grove with great agility

But life is more that sexual combustability

Veroni: Whoops. Forgot about that in there...

Misto: Too late!! I already SAID it!! **giggles**

Veroni: Oh, grow up!

The Normal Three: 'Bustability! 'Bustability!

Combustabilit---

Misto: QUIET!! (speaks) Now you'll write it, Mr. J.

Munku: Who will make me, Mr. A?

Misto: I!

Munku: You?

Misto: YES!

(Misto tries to make himself look big and important infront of the seated Munkustrap, who simply stands and towers over the "vertically challenged" Misto.)

Munku: (looking DOWN at him) How?

Misto: (speaking directly into Munku's midsection) By physical force, if necessary.

Cats: (rolling around, laughing like crazy)

Misto: I thought we weren't going to DO the short jokes anymore, VERONI!!

Veroni: That one was in the script... sorry.

Misto: It's your duty! DAM-- er, DARNIT!!!

Munku: (sighs in submission) Mr. Adams... darn you Mr. Adams!

You're obnoxious and disliked,

That cannot be denied.

Once again you stand between me and my lovely bride...

Oh, Mr. ADAMS! YOU ARE DRIVING ME TO

HOMICIDE!!!

The Normal Three: HOMICIDE!!! HOMICIDE!!!

We may see murder ye-e-e-e-e-ettt!!!

(Quickly we cut to another song now.... While Jefferson begins work on what will argueably become the most famous written piece in American history, (no pressure there, huh?) he is visited by his lovely wife, Grizabella Jefferson and Mistohn is left alone and lonely in the streets. He sadly dreams up his wife in his mind to offer him comfort.)

Misto: Oh, Abagail.. come to Catadelphia. Please come.

(The backstage cats start cranking out the theatrical smoke by running around and setting buckets of dry ice everywhere.)

Jenny: Thank you, Mistohn. I DO want to, but you know it's not possible now. The kittens still have the measles. And it appears the farm here in Braintree is failing, Mistohn. The chickens and geese have died, and the apples never survived the late frost. How do you suppose Mrs. Jefferson managed to get away?

Misto: Winters are softer in Virginia.

Jenny: And their women, Mistohn?

Tugger: I don't know about Virginia females, but Jellicle ones are PLENTY soft enough..

Veroni: (rolls eyes as Bombalurina bounds over to Tugger and they head out back) At least they took my advice about the room thing.

Misto: Fit for Virginian's madame, but pale, puny things next to New England girls.

Jenny: Oh, Mistohn. (smiles) I thank you for that.

Misto: How goes it with you, Abby?

Jenny: Not well, Mistohn. Not at all well....

(sings) I live like a nun in a cloister.

Solitary celibert, I HATE IT! (speaks) And you, Mistohn?

Misto: (sings) I live like a Monk in an Abby

Dittle... dittle... I HATE IT!

Jenny: Write to me with sentimental effusion!

Let me revel in romantic illusion!

Misto: Do you still smell of vanilla and spring air?

And is my favorite lover's pilla' still firm and fair?

Jenny: What was there, Mistohn,

Still is there, Mistohn.

Come soon as you can to my cloister!

I've forgotten the feel of your paw!

Misto: Soon, madame, we shall walk in cupid's grove together---

Both: And we'll fondly sur-VEY that promised land.

Till then, till then

I am, as I ever was and ever shall be

(tenderly) Yours.... Yours... Yours.... Yours.... Yoooooouurs......

Jenny: (right before she is completely engulfed by the fog) Saltpeter John!

Munku: Ah, our dear Jenny. Always has to get in the closing shot, huh?

Jenny: It was in the script, bonehead!

Veroni: And time for our regularly scheduled HTML break!!!

Misto: You always sound WAY to thrilled with yourself when you say that.