The likelihood of this being a "daily" blog is minimal,
but I do find myself pondering things that I'd like to post somewhere.
This is my somewhere:)
CLICK HERE to view my works in progress!
|
|
February 13, 2006: The wedding is set for June 17th, the location is reserved, the dress is bought, and the Save-the-Date cards got mailed today! I chopped off six inches of my hair today and am feeling deleriously happy as of late:) Everything is going wonderfully... January 9, 2006: Alot has happened since I last wrote in this blog. Most importantly, Danny proposed! We're planning for a spring wedding, and will be busy over the next four months getting ready for it. No date set yet, but soon... September 5, 2005: My life has changed so much since I last wrote in this blog... I hardly remember the dark times I've written about, the pain, the saddness, the frustration. It's gone now... My last job wore me to the bones, and even though I'd had no luck finding another job, I emailed my resignation to my boss (almost three months ago, now). I gave her only one week's notice (which I have never done before - I hate burning bridges and have always lived up to my two weeks before) and wiped my hands of it. Danny was amazingly supportive, which made the situation so much easier to bear. I quit at 8:45am. At about ten am I got a call from Fairfield Financial (where I had applied and interviewed about a month prior) offering me a job. I took it. The new job is umpteen million times better, though the pay is the same. I get respect, my hard work is appreciated, and I enjoy what I do. It's satisfying:) But that's not the only change in my life. I have joined SOLAR, a live-action role playing group that Danny has been involved with for six years. It's a great escape from reality, and gives me great scope for my active imagination. Most people just know I "go camping" with friends, but it is so much more. It's fun, it's hard exersize, it's social, and it is a great stress reliever. Most importantly, though, it's two days and two nights spent with Danny. He's so much more than my guardian angel, now. He's my joy. He brings light to the dark places, he brings life to my soul, he brings a smile to my heart, and he's there for me when no one else is. I've never been so utterly happy before; it's impossible to be sad, disheartened or crabby when he's with me. He is my life's companion, my soul mate if there ever was one, and no matter what happens, he will always be my best friend. And even more has happened to change my world around... I've started writing again. It's raw but it's full, and people like where it's going and how it feels. I've also taken one last stab at The Heirs of Telcar. Not YA... not yet, maybe never. My writing is too convoluted, too complex for YA. But I took a wise woman's advice (many, many months later) and brought the axe to bear on my beloved story. I chopped it to shreds, rearranged those shreds, added a bit of glue, and the result is... dramatic. One more month on OWW gathering reviews, and I'll make another round of submissions to editors and publishers. I'm going to tighten all the chapters up the same way, until I've reread the whole book, and then I'll continue on to book 2, finish that book up, and finalize the first three chapters of book 3. Then I'll work on the synopsis for Book 3, polish the one for book 2, and be done. I'm not writing book 3 until (crosses fingers) I can sell the first two (or all three). Then and only then will I finish polishing Child of Night, which is about a third done right now. It has promise... More good news? That isn't enough? Fine, I have more to share! I finally got my Jeep out of my ex-husband's name! Yep, it's all mine:) May sound minor to some people, but I have been working on that since november. Moving to another state complicated things. Then I had to have money to get a GA driver's license, a new title, and to register the damned thing here, too. By that time my preapproval had expired, as I waited for certified copies of my birth certificate, ect. But I got reapproved, got everything to the credit union, and it's done! It's mine and I love it, despite rising gas prices:) Let's see... anything else I can share/ Well, my daughter got her ears pierced, and despite the usual "talking too much" problem at school, she's doing very well in her studies. She is at the reading level she's supposed to be at by the END of 2nd grade, and continues to improve in that area. Needs more work in math, but she's far from "behind." She's my little angel, only that halo is hanging on her pitchfork:) She amuses me and keeps me on my toes. I think I'll keep her... LOL! Well, I'm sure I could think of more to say, but it's getting late and I should get to bed. There's someone warm and wonderful in there waiting for me... May 23, 2005: Hitting a rough spot again, where I feel a little moody. Been feeling... odd... the last week or so. I know it's stress, but it's getting old. Nausiated (and please don't mention the P word because I checked that first) and moody. Headaches and short temper. It's fine at home. I take a nap if I'm feeling too bad, but Dan's an angel and the kids have been so good, I generally ignore my misery there. But at work, it's another story. My moodiness and easy temper have apparently been reported to my boss in Tallahassee. I just got chewed out this morning. That polite chewing out where you can't say they were mean, but you cry anyways. Wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't the fifth or sixth chewing out I've received from people in Tallahassee. The problem is, I do my job. And I do it well. I just don't do it the way they apparently want me to. But every time I try to adjust to the way they tell me to do it, I do something else they don't like. It's like trying to please six people who all want different things that conflict with each other. I started having these "discussions" on what's right and what I should be doing via email. So I could look back and prove that I'm doing what I was told. Well, my boss didn't like that. Apparently that makes my conversations too formal and I'm not socializing. I also learned this morning that it is my job to sit at my desk, LOOK busy, but stop every single time a person walks by and CHAT with them. They need to see a big smile and feel welcome, even if they aren't there to see me and are just walking by. I thought I was a processor, not a hostess. Well, this whole mess doesn't help my mood or my headaches. And the nausia is five times more apparent when I'm miserable and there's not a smiling face around. Once again I am alone in this office. No one is here. No one will be here. Yet *I* seem standoffish. Hello, at least I'm here! Don't know what to do. I don't want to look for another job. I hate interviews, I hate lying to take the time off work. I hate quitting. I hate starting a new job that I may not like... But I honestly HATE being here. Why is it so hard to find a job I like? That I enjoy? I'm good at this shit. They spent three months praising my abilities. I was amazing. I was perfect. Now I'm getting yelled at every other day. *I* didn't change. I'm doing everything I did before. But now it's not right, it's not good enough and I suck. I know, life's not fair. But I'd take kinda fair right now. My personal life is damned perfect, so maybe that's the half fair bi, but considering I spend 45 hours a day at work, you'd think it would be possible to make enough money to pay your bills AND at least not hate it. Anyways, I just needed to vent... In other news (and this is the good stuff) Dan and I went to a NIN concert last night. VERY good. Had alot of fun. I'm still getting used to a man who loves public displays of affection. It's very nice to be held and kissed no matter where we are (and I'm talking about the lovey-dovey stuff that makes some people groan, but nothing that would make children look away:P Our friends and family tease us and tell us to get a room, but that's just cuz they like to see me blush, methinks) Anyways, Dan is very affectionate, which I'm not used to, but it makes me feel so very good. The concert was excellent, we bought a Dresden Dolls CD and matching NIN tee-shirts and got home about 1:30-ish. Made for an icky morning of not wanting to get up, but Dan started back at work today, so at least I had someone to get up WITH. And now I just have to make it through the week. Bree's last day of school is Friday and she'll be spending the night at a friend's house so that Dan can take me to my first SOLAR event. I'm nervous and excited. I hope I fit in to his world there... he has so many friends, and quite a few lady admirers, I can assume, and I hope no one thinks I'm crashing a party. But I think I'll fit in there. Who better to slip into a fantasy world and pretend to be someone else than a fantasy author? It will give me so much scope for my imagination... it will also allow me to spend time with Danny and his friends, whereas the alternative would be to stay home for three days and miss him. This event is a four-day one, but I'm only going for Fri night and Saturday. Partly because of Bree, but mostly because I want to get a feel for it and then let Dan have a few days to hang out with his friends without me along. He hasn't gotten to spend any time with them since December. Then June is event-less, but we have two events in July. If I survive those, and don't feel like I'm stepping on anyone's toes, I will consider myself official and stay with it. I know Dan wants me there, which will help nudge me into sticking with it, but I'll need to make some friends on my own if I'm going to have any fun long-term. So we shall see. Well, my headache is turning out to be a migraine, so I'm going to go take some meds and try to survive the day. Is it Friday yet? May 4, 2005: When things are going good, it's harder to stay on top of this blog. It is a useful tool for venting my frustrations and fears, and though it is also a place to proclaim my accomplishments, it's easier to rant than to gloat:) Things are good for me right now. Very good. My angel is back from overseas, and my house has become a home. Sure, it's hectic to have a toddler around the house, to have two kids bickering and squealing. To share my life with a man again, this one so unfamiliar in so many important ways. Little things like laundry has to be relearned. Sharing. Communication. But it is all worth the effort. I feel alive again, and though it has shot my freetime all to hell, it has opened up a well of words within me. I've started writing poetry and songs lately. Dating a musician does that, I suppose, but I find sometimes my feelings don't quite make sense till I put them into words, yet what I feel isn't a story. It's a picture that poetry and songs can express. I've also been punching out my new book. I'm on Chapter 16 today. It's flowing quite well, and though it's rough - very rough, it's GOOD. Yet today I was looking around Ralan.com and feeling very... unprolific. I haven't had anything published in a year. Granted I haven't TRIED to have anything published in a long time, and what I have submitted has been for contests, not solid markets. I guess that stems from my frustration that my stories never seem to end up being stories. "Child of Night" started as a simple short story about a birth, yet everyone nagged me to make it a book. So I am. Why is it flash fiction is so much SIMPILER now than just writing short stories? It used to be harder for me. Now it's all I do, yet publishing flash fiction doesn't get a writer anywhere. I emailed SFWA to see if there was something that could be done about it. Short fiction deserves a spot in the speculative fiction world of today. Someone who has 500 flash stories published, all for pay, yet none of them recognized by SFWA is still a respected, published writer. But that's a rant for another day. I'm suddenly crabby:P So anyways, I have alot less free time, and I spend it devided between my new family, working on my piano skills, writing "Child of Night", and returning reviews. Not to mention the magazine. We're down another editor. I wish I could bottle time and let out small segments when I needed them. Time and money. With a little more of both, I could get so much accomplished. As is, I'm stressed and stretched too thin, yet I'm making due and I'm happy. So I will survive... March 14, 2005: Wow. I can't believe it's been a month since I last wrote here, and much has happened in that time. I finally have a job, working as a mortgage loan processor again. Someday I will go back to school and find a CAREER. Someday. But not today. Today I need a paycheck, and that's what I'm doing. Finally. It's been a long, hard road, but with people who love me lending me the support I need, I've survived unscathed. I have a home, I now have a job which gives me purpose, and I have family. It's as much as I need, though I admit to wanting more. I want adventure. I want my bills to go away. I want my books to line bookstore shelves. And I want peace. I've given up on The Heirs right now. Or not rally given up, but I'm revising the series for YA, which is a feat of its own. But that's not NOW. Right now I'm working on a new book, Child of Night. It's in its infancy, and rough, but it has gone surprisingly fast. In less than a month I have eight chapters done. No, far less than a month. It's been two weeks to the day. Amazing! I've also gone through some of my flash fiction, the stuff that I didn't feel good enough to get published, and took axes to them. When Flashshots reopens for regular submissions, they'll find a home there, I hope. Small publications that won't pay the bills, but any publication fuels the fires within in, giving me hope that one day bigger things will make bigger splashes in the bigger publishing world. As a writer, I'll take what I can get. I don't write for fame or money. I write to feed my own hunger, and merely hope the words I produce will be enjoyed by others someday. I do long for my books on the bookstore shelves, but merely for the enjoyment of walking in, seeing them on their shelves, and smiling with accomplishment. As for the rest of life, well, dare I say I want another wedding and another baby? They would be nice, but in truth, I am happy with life as it is. Pay off the bills, buy a house instead of rent, and have a career I enjoy... those are hopes. Right now I have everything I need. And more. My angel walks beside me, protects me from my own fears, and gives me much-needed love. My daughter, though ever a trial, is my joy. Life is as it should be. Enough. I never wanted more than enough... February 13, 2005: Death and taxes, they say... but right now it feels more like Rebirth and taxes. My life has changed so much in the last two months, it's hard to know where to begin. I'm still jobless, but amazingly I've managed to survive this long, far longer than I'd ever imagined. I have an interview on Wednesday, which I am so very nervous about. I want the job. Very much. And I'm so afraid I won't get it, what with the lack of luck I've had thus far. January 17, 2005: A new year, another year gone, a stack of memories added to the collection, another set of goals set forth for the new year ahead. Life changes, sometimes subtly, sometimes dramatically, as it has for me. December 9, 2004: Every time I hit a speedbump, I find some silver lining in the rainclouds. Good days, bad days... I'm having alot of each. But through it all I've had a little angel to talk to, who makes me see that everything is going to be ok. And then, miraculously, I start to see that it will. December 5, 2004: Tonight I am having a panic attack over the unknown future laying before me. I try to pretend everything will be okay, but I am so scared that it won't. I wonder what I'm getting myself into. What am I doing? December 2, 2004: Well life is feeling normal again, in a weird sort of way... it finally snowed this weekend, so that's a bright spot here in Nebraska. It's still not freezing, thank goodness, and there wasn't enough snow to have to shovel it, but enough to make my daughter happy... November 17, 2004: It's still not snowing here - in fact, it's going to rain today. And tomorrow. I knew the weather in NE was screwed up, but this is just crazy:) Other than the weather being screwy, life here is pretty darn good. Which is surprising since I'm sick. Not deathly ill, but I am going home early today to catch up on my sleep. I've been packing alot lately, and trying to relax and have some fun. I saw three movies last week, which was nice, and I have tons of movies on DVD to watch. I haven't read in a long time, or written for that matter, but there will be time for that later. I'm actually trying to meet some new people and just enjoy being who I am. November 7, 2004: I sat down here to write in this blog, to get some thoughts out, to clear my head. Now that I'm here, my head is so clear there's nothing to say. Life is progressing as scheduled, and I'm unsatisfied about that. I keep waiting for someone to pick up the little snowglobe I'm living in, and shake it around. The sky should fall, the pieces should fall back into place. It should be snowing. Not only is it NOT snowing here in Nebraska, it was warm enough today to wear only a tee-shirt. What's up with that? October 19, 2004: What's the deal with that question "If a tree falls in the forest when no one's around, does it make a sound?" It may seem like some deep question people debate, but put a person in place of the tree. If a person screams and no one is around, does the person make a noise? Of course. But what difference does it make? If you're all alone and there's not one person you can talk to, you might as well not be making a noise. October 17, 2004: I went to Barnes and Noble today - love them to death! - and went to look at haircut mags because I'm looking for a new 'do. Well, as I'm leaving, I see the new isue of F&SF. I bend down for a look. Read the names. I recognize one! Steven Utley, who is in our current issue!! So a grab it. Right next to it is Analog. I look. I see another name a recognize! Kenneth Brady will be in our next issue. October 16, 2004: A friend asked why I haven't been writing. It got me thinking about what my problem really is. I think I've lost my focus. I have so many things whirling around in my head, and I can't make sense of any of it. How is it I can be so busy, yet accomplish nothing? But that's not the hard question. The hard question is what am I after? I know I'm not the only who who lost track of what they wanted to be and what they wanted to do. And I can't be the only one who isn't happy with where they ended up. I really only have two things that I am truly happy about: my daughter and my writing. And both of those come with their own problems. But I want to do so much with my life, and I wonder how I can do it all, and when. And how much will it cost. My sister called me from the airport yesterday. She was waiting for her flight to Rome. She'll be 21 at the end of ths month, and this is her third trip to Europe. I've never been. I'm a little jealous, naturally, but I'm more proud. She knows what she wants to do, and she does it. She gets scared, and has doubts. But she pushes onward, and comes back with amazing stories. She's the adventurous one. She's free. And I hope she never gets her wings clipped. I clipped my own wings, then I stand on the ground, look up at the sky, and wish I could fly. No one pushed me to do any of the things I did. I made my own choices, and the path I've followed has been good. But there's so much more I could have done. I charged down this road without stopping for a break, without taking any detours, and now I feel like I missed my exit and am lost. My copilot and navigator hopped in another car and took his own path. Now I'm alone, lost, and unsure of the way to go. No one can help me from here on out, because no one else will follow me to my destination. So I have to plot my own course, find my own destination, and hope I find what I'm looking for along the way. That's terribly frightening to me. I am the shy one. The scared one. Yet I want to fly. So what do I want? What do I want to be? I want to have a house of my own. It doesn't have to be big, but I want it to be mine to do with as I like. I want to write books and stories and make a name for myself. I want my magazine to be considered pro. I want people to be thrilled about being published in my mag. I want to be a good mother. I want to make a decent living. I want to be in love again. I want to get out of debt, and be able to buy the things I want. And I want to see Europe. I want my daughter to see Europe, and to do more than I did. I want to be happy, and healthy, and safe. When I pray, I ask God to watch over me and my family and to keep us safe, healthy, and happy. The safe and healthy I can't do too much about, but I am in control of my own happiness. So how to I make myself happy? I don't know. Right now, there's still too much clutter - in my head, in my house, in my life. And trying to get rid of the clutter seems to take more energy than I have. I'm so tired, and I feel like I'm running around in circles. I feel pathetic at times. Yet I feel good about my goals. I just need to keep working my way toward them, and pray for luck along the way. Sorry if that's a bit deeper than you wanted to read... but I feel slightly better now. It felt good to write something, even if it really is nothing. Reminds me of the saying: "Nobody's perfect. I'm nobody. So I must be perfect.":) October 13, 2004: I haven't written in a while, so I thought I'd just write a quick update. I found a lawyer and the final decree is all typed up and ready to go. I will be emailing it to my husband to review before filing the petition for divorce. It's not a road I wanted to travel, but I am realizing now that he's no longer the companion I want to travel the road to the future with. So what now? I'm not sure entirely. I'm trying to get back into writing, and am planning to move to Atlanta at the end of the year. When my divorce is final. For now, there isn't much else to say:) August 18, 2004: It's been ages since I wrote in here. Professionally, there hasn't been much to say. More denials, only one new story has been written, and I haven't done much in the way of working on my book, though I did post three more chapters (finally) on OWW. Personally speaking, however, life has been anything but dull. And I'd honestly prefer dull. My husband is deployed overseas to an undisclosed location, and while he was away, he decided he didn't want to be married to me anymore. It's very hard to be the only one who wants to stay in a marriage, but I think I'm handling it well. I'm planning for the future, and trying to find a new place to call home. I moved from my parents' house, to a college dorm room, to a very short stay in my own rented room, to my grandparent's house, back to the dorms, and then in with my husband when we got engaged. A year later he joined the Air Force, and the government has told us where to live. This will be my first time choosing my life. But truth be told - I'm scared. I don't want to be alone, I don't want to start a new life, and I just wish things could go back to the way they were. I will adapt, but I hate that I have to. Stress forced me on a leave of absence, on which I did nothing of importance. That was wonderful, but now I'm back at work and wondering if I will remain sane in the months to come. Writing has become near impossible. Reviewing seems unfair - I don't want to subject anyone to my scatterbrain-edness. Somedays I don't recognize my own name:) So my life is in limbo, not moving forward yet not really standing still. I find my own thoughts dizzying and others do, too.... But I'll survive. May 25, 2004: A whole month has flown by since I last wrote in this thing... and to tell the truth, not much has happened in that one month. I haven't been writing much, though I did finish a difficult chapter. I received alot of story denials over the past month, but that does mean I've been submitting, which is always good. April 25, 2004: I haven't been writing lately. My writing seems to be on hold. I'm disappointed by the rejections I've received, but that's not it, exactly. Real life has been taking my time. Nothing good, nothing bad. Just enjoying my family, my new job, and my dog. April 15, 2004: Death and Taxes, they always say... March 21, 2004: It's Sunday, and I have an interesting week ahead of me. March 9, 2004: I did get a denial letter from one agent, but today - TODAY - I received a nice little letter: Dear Ms. Michaels: Not getting my hopes up, but AM preparing the packet for him. IN OTHER NEWS: I've been trying to get some more short stories written, and thought back on some of my better ones. Ok. The PUBLISHED ones. All of them started with a theme. Some contest the story was specifically written for. So. For lack of specific markets to write for, I decided to find inspiration elsewhere. Art. I remembered a fantasy background website which had pictures as a left-hand border. Hmmm... So I checked it out, and BAM! Inspiration. I've written three - yes THREE - new short stories from this one big cache of inspiration. "Unicorn Sunset," "Midnight Stroll," and "Wizard's Clutter" (to be renamed soon) are all around 1000 words and pretty good. Midnight Stroll got the best feedback, while people who enjoy children's stories enjoyed Unicorn Sunset. Wizard's Clutter needs work, according to the two reviews it has right now. But still! THREE stories in two days. I'm proud of myself. I'll polish them all up, add them to my works in progress page, and start marketing them. But I have so many other short stories that need polishing and submitting, and I am TRYING to get The Heirs all polished and done with. I have thru Ch 46 completely polished. But these last ten chapters haven't been cleaned up after the reviews received on OWW, so it's slow going. I work on it in the bath tub, while watching tv, and any other free moment I have to spare. PLUS I need to finish Ch 22 of The Corodoio so the book can move onward and I can post more of it to the workshop. TOO MUCH TO DO!!!!! Well, I'm not getting any of that stuff done while typing in this blog. Gotta get back to work! Febraury 28, 2004: Not too much to say, but I realized it has been a while since I wrote here... I did get a reject from my first choice agent, so I sent 9 more queries out in the mail last week. Hopefully someone will bite. It's been a depressing week in other parts of my life. Nothing really solid to point to, but work sucks, I haven't been writing, and I spent all night tossing and turing cuz my arm hurts. Lack of sleep always makes me irritable, any way, but I find myself staring out into space, wondering why life can't be different. I should just write my life different... but I have enough projects on my plate. I haven't submitted any short stories in months, and haven't written any, either. I write a little in Book 2, edit alot in Book 1, and spend a large chunk of my day reviewing other people's work. Rewarding in its own way, but not very productive when it comes to getting myself published. Oh, well. Such is life.... Febraury 16, 2004: Well, I injured my wrist, so writing and reviewing have slowed down a bit. My arm got jarred when I slammed the shower door open, only to have it slam back at me. Then I proceeded to shovel snow all week. I know. Crazy me for trying to get my car out of the driveway so I could go to work. With all of that, and all the typing I do all day, my wrist starting causing me severe pain, enough that I went to the doctor. Now I'm wearing a brace for the next two weeks until the nerves can heal. Lovely. So instead of writing, I've been editing my books. Overall, it doesn't require two hands, and I've been making progress. Got the first 36 chapters of The Heirs polished and ready to go. Only 36 more to go, I think. The problem is, I keep chopping chapters in half because some are too long, so it adds more chapters to the 51 I had before I started polishing. But I'm trying to keep the chapters between 10 and 20 pages, between 2K and 4K words. So far it's worked, but I find it funny to think an agent might want me to combine chapters so they're all 4 or 5 K:) Oh well. I do what I think is right for now, knowing I might have to fix it all later. Febraury 2, 2004: It's been a busy, busy weekend for me. I've narrowed my list of possible agents down to 16, with one who doesn't accept simultaneous submissions coming first. I also put the final polish on my query letter, which went surprisingly quick. A friend, who tends to be overly critical, said it put hers to shame. THAT meant alot to me. I've also been working on Book 3, getting almsot two full chapters done. It's hard to write a sequal to book that hasn't ended yet, but I knew where I wanted to start, so it's been rather easy. I wonder if the beginning I've chosen isn't too action-packed, but we'll have a to wait a few months - maybe more - before I can post it for opinions. I did get one page of a synopsis done for book 2 (yes, everything but the end third), and I started a synopsis for book 3, which should help guide my plot along there.. In more exciting news, my friend Cal asked if I'd mind co-authoring another story with him. He wrote the story, I added some characterization and did a good grammer and punctuation clean-up, now he's taking another look at it. I'll be posting it on OWW tomorrow, and we'll see if it's the winner I think it is. January 29, 2004: It's a sad day in this author's life. Tor rejected my proposal for The Heirs of Telcar. The letter was nice, and I'll be framing it, but that doesn't help the disappointment. Kinda at a loss of what to do now. Shopping for agents, but I need to finish polishing the rest of the book before I can send the ms directly to DAW or Baen, my two other publishing choices. One of my best friends received good news on her book, however. Gives me hope, yet I wish the timing had been a little different. It's hard to celebrate for someone else when you've just been denied. Thank goodness we're long-distance friends. It's easier to be happy for her when she doesn't have to see my face:) I do wish her all the best and I shall keep working on mine. It's a hard business, this writing.... January 6, 2004: Well, today's been a whirl-wind. Not sure when I wrote "The Cup of Truth" but that's doing well on the workshop. I also just finished another brand new story called "The Evil Within" (for now.) I think I like the title "Evil Begets Evil" better, but we'll see. Anyways, it's for an anthology that I wanted to submit to but hadn't been able to actually write anything on. It came in to being when my story "The Return" got rejected far too quickly from NFG. The comments from the editor said I'd picked the wrong part of the story to focus on. I agreed. So I picked a different character and told HER story. Think it worked really well. Shall workshop it and see how it does. January 5, 2004: Um. Ok. WOW! I heard about a market called FLASHSHOTS, which is a daily email site that email stories under 100 words on a daily basis. When they reach 365 stories (yes, each year) they publish the stories in a book and any royalties are split. So, basically, it's non-paying. But it sounded fun. So I polished off "The Scout" which didn't make it into the 69-er contest at NFG, which is the only thing a wrote it for. I didn't even write it really. I just cut my longer story "If You Only Knew" which didn't seem to sell.
So anyways, I emailed the story in. Fifteen minutes later they replied back that they liked it and it'd be scheduled for "emailing." WoW! That's the fastest turn-around time I've ever heard of. Yeah! January 4, 2004: Well, I've had a bit of a vacation, through which, my hubby has been working. I left work early on the 31st and haven't gone back yet. In that time, I've been doing ALOT! I've managed to get all the stories selected for the new issue of Flash Me, and have most of them formatted and ready to go. It's going to be a good issue. We chose 11 stories, one of which is by my friend Sandie. Two other authors from the first issue are back with new stories. I like the repeat of business:) As for writing, there's news there, too. I've been putting the final polish on Book 1, trying to get it completely done and out of my hair so I can concentrate fully on Book 2. It's hard work, editing a book you've read 500 times already, but I'm still amazed at my own story. I find myself captivated. That's good, I suppose;) I have the first 19 chapters completely polished, and I'm striving to have the first half done by month-end. That's about through Ch 28 or so. I also set a list of stories to work on. I submitted "Ruining Lunchtime" to Story House, the coffee people. I wasn't sure if they accepted reprints or not, but decided to give it a try. I've also decided to send "A Dying Goddess" to F&SF, as soon as I get it polished. That's another task to do. And then, this morning, I wrote a brand new short story. It's 1100 words - an odd length that will be hard to sell. Not happy about that - would have preferred it to be much shorter or much longer - but I *am* happy about writing something new, completely from scratch, and all within the span of an hour. I posted it on my workshops, so we'll see what others think of it. Have no idea where to submit it, though. Other than doing alot of polishing, I don't see too much in store for January. It should be a lazy month, filled with writing. December 12, 2003: Now I've finished Ch 17, which, if the book is 50 chapters long like book 1, isn't exactly half, but it's a significant chunk. I'm happy, at any rate.... December 9, 2003: I've officially finished the first 15 chapters of The Corodoio! That makes me feel SO good. That's about half the book!! Haven't done much else, it's been such a crazy weekend and first of the week... and we just had our first major snowfall today. It doesn't help that my husband is off this week. Makes me want to write even less. December 4, 2003: I just wrote the climax to book 2. I won't spoil it by saying what happened, but it was one of those rare flash of inspirations where your hands flow across the keyboard and you're sucked into the story. It was magic! Needless to say I'm feeling quite good about the whole session, and felt like sharing. I just love effortless writing that feels more like watching a movie than typing. THAT'S what keeps me going. That heady self-satisfaction when you just purely create. No thought, no attention to grammer and "was"es. To find the grammer pretty darn good and very few "was"es at the end is just icing on the cake.
Now I just need to write the rest of the story to connect to it. December 2, 2003: A few days back I submitted "Wrath of a Goddess" to NFG. It's made it through the first read-through and will now sit and linger until it's either accepted or denied. I hate waiting:) In the meantime, I have finished "A Dying Goddess'" formerly known as Prince. Just kidding. It was called "Death of a Goddess." Now I just need to polish it before submitting. It came out rather well, if I must say so, and LONG! It's almost 4500 words, by far one of my longest stories. I've also made a list of every short story I've written and made a "to do" list. Either it gets resubmitted or it gets polished, posted for reviews THEN resubmitted. If I can punch out all seventeen (I know, that's alot!) by Jan 31 I'll be happy. I've also set some goals for my books. I'm hoping to finish the final polish of The Heirs by 1-31-04, and the rough draft of The Corodoio by 2-28-03. Then I need a synopsis of the book, and need to move on to Book 3, while posting Book 2 for reviews. Which means returning those reviews, which sucks some time out of my schedule, but I do enjoy that part. I'm also toying with the idea of finishing my not-yet-really-titled book Laurin in a month. I think it'd be fun to work on something for a solid month and see if it can be finished (rough draft, mind you). It's about 40% done right now - the beginning, the end and a bit in between. That's certainly enough work for me til June... November 16, 2003: Well, two denials in one day! How rude!! My story "Deadly Kisses" was denied by Falshquake, and my story "Wrath of a Goddess" didn't make it in the Distant Worlds contest. Ho Hum! Guess this means I should polish them a bit and send them out elsewhere... Meanwhile, I have four stories I should be finishing, but I've spent so much time working on The Heirs and The Corodoio that I haven't done much in the way of short stories. Plus, I'm about to trade my very nice ergo keyboard in for a plain old boring one. The keys are starting to go on this one and it makes writing a challange... November 11, 2003: It's been a while since I posted here. I just downloaded the Dead in Th13rteen Flashes Anthology. You can do it, too at: http://www.dreampeople.org/ Other than that, not much is new. I'm about half done with Book 2, The Corodoio, and finishing the polish on Book 1. Haven't submitted anything new, and haven't heard on any of my older submissions. Soon. I hope. October 6, 2003: Well, I just heard a collaboration story of mine, "Vanity" written with my friend Cal, made it into the "Dead in Thirteen Flashes" anthology. It goes live 10-31-03, in downloadable format.
The story started as a pathetic excuse for a horror, where the character gets stuck inside his dead body. Cal suggested a revision so good I tried to get him to take all the credit, but he suggested a co-authorship. We spent about a week perfecting it, until we came up with "Vanity". I've never co-authored anything before, and I've never been in an anthology. I'm excited.
In other news, I just emailed the editor of the Distant Worlds contest. He said they should definitly know by the end of the month, but some of the judges were taking longer than expected to respond. I also emailed the editor for Cicada, where I submitted "One Life Ends" about 4 months ago. She wasn't very nice, but said if I hadn't heard anything back yet, I should resubmit. I did, and now have to wait another 4 months. She explained that they don't record all submissions, just ones they buy, so she had no idea if they received mine or not. Lovely. And so professional. Tor sent me a nice postcard saying they'd received my book. You'd think a magazine could do as much. That's all I have submitted right now, though if "Wrath of a Goddess" doesn't make it at Distant Worlds, I'll be resubmitting that. Oh! I do have "Deadly Kisses" at Flashquake. Haven't had much luck with them in the past, though. We'll see. September 1, 2003: Three contest submissions, two denials back. My story "Deadly Kisses" didn't make it into the Writer's Ezine issue this time, and I just saw the list of winners on the Ralan.com contest. I wasn't one of them. So now I have "Wrath of a Goddess" sitting at the Distant Worlds contest... we'll have to wait and see.
August 27, 2003: I received my postcard back from Tor saying they received my ms. Just a simple note with the date and to allow 4-6 months. I have doubts it'll be given serious thought, though, as I did my final polish on the first 4 chapters and realized Chapters 1 and 2 were REALLY long. Avg chapter is 11-15 pages. Chapter one was 26 pages. So... I started rearranging things and am much happier, but it added 2 more chapters to the book. So I don't think I gave my best foot forward. I'll try DAW when I get the rejection (unless the denial from Tor suggests resubmitting) and then I start agent hunting. I've been putting it off because I have no idea where to start, but it's time to get serious. Really serious...
August 17, 2003: Well, I've finished revisions on the end of The Heirs, and have just ch 44 to punch into shape. Then it's a final polish for the first 26 chapters, revisions for Ch 26-36 and waiting for reviews on the last few chapters. Then it'll be done.
Book 2 is coming along, with the prologue and first 5 chapters written and the plot planned out on the whole thing. About 50% of the book is written, I just have to add new plot lines and thread the chapters together.
So now what? I need to work on more short stories. I'd like to keep submitting at least one thing a month, but I'm out of stories I think are publishable. I have about 4 I could revise, but I'm sick of looking at them. I need new inspirations. In the meantime, I'm on a private crit marathon, trying to return favors and get new eyes on the last part of the book.
August 11, 2003: Exactly a month since I wrote, hmm? Well, it's certainly been a busy month. Went on our cruise to the Eastern Carribean, worked on my book... yes, I've accomplished alot in that department!
My synopsis is done (for now, anyway) and after getting about 10 reviews of it, including my husband's, I think it's as good as it's gonna get. So I finished the final polish of the first three chapters, printed them, my synopsis and a cover letter, and am shipping them off to Tor tomorrow. A long shot, I know, but we have to start somewhere and I always aim for the stars:)
I've also finished the first round of polishing on the first half of the book. Chapters 1-25 are complete (ok, they have been for years) but I'm going to print them out 4 at a time and work on povs, passive voice, and little typos the computer misses. Then they'll be done.
I've also almost finished tying up the ending after chopping those 30,000 words. Just a few more places to tidy up and I'll consider the book done. Then I move on to book two. It needs alot more work (and a solid plot!) I've got the prologue and the first 4 chapters done on that book, too.
Other than that, I've been posting chapters like mad on OWW, which means returning the big stack of reviews I owe there. I did 12 reviews the past few days, and have about that many left to give. Then I can turn my attention to Book Crit, where I've been neglecting some old friends. By the time I'm done there, I hope my other groups have posted new stuff for me to look at. Two have been rather slow, but I expect them all to pick up after school starts.
I can't believe Breanna starts school on thursday! She's getting too big!
But it's late and I should get to bed... hopefully I'll have more to say before the end of the month. I entered a few contests that I should hear back from by month end...
July 11, 2003: Well, I brushed off "Wrath of a Goddess" and submitted her to the Distant Worlds Short Story Contest. We shall see:)
July 10, 2003: I've hit on a creative streak! It's about time....
I wrote a 251 word flash story for Writer's Ezine's Contest, using the world Intangible, Bullet, and Metanormal. It's a little off my usual track, but I like it:) Don't have a name yet, but as soon as I do I'll add it to my WIP page.
July 7, 2003: Not much is new writing-wise, but I felt the need to "blog":) I've been so busy lately that it's been hard to get writing done. I've been doing snippets. The first snippet was going through my reviews on chapters 20 through 30 so I can edit those chapters. My sister is almost done with the first 20 chapters and requests more. Soon.
I *think* I have through chapter 43 ready to be reviewed, but it's a slow time for reviewers on all three sites, and I only have Chapters 31, 32, and 33 up. At this rate, it might be months before I get reviewes on these later chapters. As it is, I only had two reviews on ch 30. That's horrible!
Anyways, I have the first book almost done (I've been revising it to chop about 30,000 words) and have about 2 chapters left to "fix". My biggest concern right now, though, is getting my synopsis reviewed. I've posted it three places and only had ONE comment. Not good at all. I even begged for them, to no avail. I can't submit the book without a synopsis, and I *KNOW* my rough draft isn't up to snuff. I just need a little help.
The second book is coming along nicely, with 4 chapters reviewed... but that's the least of my concerns. I want to get the creative juices flowing, but I'm just not in the mood. I have three short stories to be submitted, after one final go-through, but I can't manage to do it. And forget writing anything new. Practically impossible.
Such is a writer's life...
June 22, 2003: Well, I finally got the time to submit my story to Ralan.com's writing contest... good thing, too. I thought submissions were accepted through July 31st, but it actually ends this month. Whew! I would have been so upset had I missed it.
So anyways, I sent my first 500 words of "Not Quite As It Seems" and we'll see. It cost $20 to participate, but it's for a good cause... and I think my story has a chance.
Other than that, not much is new. I haven't written anything new, but I did scan and post the maps I'd drawn long ago for The Heirs. I also chopped a significant portion of the first book, and have outlined and started significant work on the next two books.
I also have a cover letter and the first three chapters of The Heirs ready to go to Tor Books... I just need to work on the synopsis. That'll be the hard part, and I don't think I'll manage to do it all before my birthday. Only 6 days left...
May 21, 2003: I just learned I won a flash fiction contest! Here's snippets from the email I got:
"Our April 2003 Flash Fiction Contest has closed and the winners contacted and to the best of my knowledge (according to my contact at Simon & Schuster) prizes shipped. Winners of the contest received a copy of both Two Heads are Better Than One and Who Let the Dogs Out? from the Alien Clones From Outer Space series by children's author H.B. Homzie. CLICK HERE to read it! The editor said: "Ruining Lunchtime" by Jennifer Michaels has a relaxed feel that is rare in a 300-word story. I received my denial email from Flashquake so "Through My Chosen Doorway" is officialy dead. I might post it here, or sneak it into one of the new magazine's issues. Hate to do that though... if I did, it'd be under my psuedo-name "Nacie Laurin". I haven't written anything lately, and other than polishing a few things, I've hardly written or read anything in weeks! That's VERY hard for me to believe. I bought a new series by Coe, and just can't get into a reading groove again. The book is good, but I'm feeling very overwhelmed with work and life. Hopefully that will change soon. Cross my fingers:) May 12, 2003: Well, I got my denial letter from F&SF, but went ahead and edited it for a children's magazine last night. Had to chop out about 700 words to make it qualify, but it still feels like the same story. Will be shipping it off today, but they have twelve weeks to reply. Not much else is new... I'm editing Chapters 1-25 right now of The Heirs, chopping away at the passiveness so the chapters are as solid as they can be... soon, I'll finish the later chapters and get the thing submitted, but I need to work on a synopsis and cover letter, along with polishing those first three chapters. Only 1.5 months to go before I submit it to an editor! May 5, 2003: I took the plunge: I decided to go through with the new online magazine and have started advertising it. I'd had the pages set up for almost 2 months, but was wary about starting anything right now. I think I'm ready, though, so here goes nothing! In other news, I printed off "One Life Ends" and submitted it to F&SF. Nervous about it, but I'll get over it:) I also submitted "The Return" to Strange Horizons, though I'm confident I'll get a denial. They don't do too much "fantasy" stuff. Also, despite my reservations about my revised "A Still, Solemn Night" it has been received well on OWW... it might work afterall! April 28, 2003: Well, not much has happened since I sold my story... Haven't written anything new but have been tidying up a few things. Am editing "One Life Ends" for submission, am going to revise "A Still, Solemn Night" too. I've also been editing The Heirs, though, truth be told, I'm basically just working on the synopsis. I did get the prologue through Ch 19 revised for the final time, printed it off and made a copy for my sister to edit. Gotta get the next 20 done for her, but I only have through Ch 24 posted on the workshop, and only thru Ch 38 ready to be posted... gotta tidy up the ending, then get them all reviewed before the book goes anywhere... Have alot of work to do on the second book, still, but I have the first 5 chapters cleaned up and ready for submission. That's a start! Let's just forget about Book 3, as right now it's basically non-existant. April 14, 2003: OMG!!!! I sold my first story!!!!! EOTU Magazine bought my short story "The Bargain" for their April issue. The check is already in the mail! I'm so unbelievably excited! I'm published! Yeah! March 28, 2003: Sometimes it hard being a writer. My flash story "Tears for the Future" was rejected by Storyhouse after the second run of reviews... seemed they had no place for it. I have "The Bargain" submitted to EOTU Magazine, "Through My Chosen Doorway" at Flasquake, and "The Scout", a 69 word story at NFG. This is my last chance for "Through My Chosen Doorway". If I can't get it through at Flashquake, they'll at least give me their opinions on it, and I can go from there. It'll either be rewritten or maybe I'll submit it to WoW Ezine in a few months. "The Return" is entering the WoW contest about Elves, and "Not Quite As It Seems" is slated for ralan.com's contest in June. I did publish a poem at WoW Ezine under the name Nacie Laurin, but it kinda feels like it was accepted just because it was readable and there was little competition. The good news is I'm now the Flash Fiction Editor at WoW Ezine, and I'm about to start my own online magazine called "Flash Me Magazine" exclusively for flash stories. There really aren't alot of markets for flash, and I think it could be big when I can afford to pay pro rates. I hope to be able to in a year. Another bright spot on the horizon is that I've revised the ending for The Heirs, and have promised my sister that I'll begin marketing it by my birthday. That gives me three months to finish revisions, get a synopsis and cover letter ready, and make a list of agents/markets to ship it to. I think I'm scared to get to that point. Maybe that's why I keep editing it. I'm scared of it being rejected. I mean, I haven't managed to get a short story published, how will I get a full blown novel bought?. But those are not good thoughts for a writer, so I'll try not to worry about it:). March 4, 2003: Well, alot has happened recently. More rejection letters, but one of my stories is now in its second round of editing at a market. I've also written several short stories, and revised two of my older stories to be submitted once again. I also wrote another short story, and this one IS over 2000 words. It's called "One Life Ends" and is based in the OtherRealm world just as "A Still, Solemn Night". I think it has potential, and I'm going to revise it then submit it to a young adult market. Overall, a productive month for this author:) February 22, 2003: Well, I wrote another short story tonight. Not flash, which now worries me. It's too long to be flash, but about 500 words short of being the 2K most sites want... what's a girl to do?
But I feel that glow of accomplishment at having written someting fresh once again. It's called "A Still, Solemn Night" and it's about the premature birth of a Gifted child. In this world, Gifted children are found while in the womb and monitered. They are allowed to stay with the parents until the age of 13, then are taken for training. This premature baby is taken right after birth so he can be kept alive. Sad, but a good story, methinks:) February 10, 2003: I did a final revision of "Wrath of a Goddess". No more, I'm done. I'll spend next weekend looking for a home for it... since it's not flash, that should make it easier, though it's still well short of the 2,000 word lower limit many mags have... February 3, 2003: I *FINALLY* wrote a complete short story!!! It's called "The Nightmare Ends" and is about dying only to find that life had been a dream and now you're condemned to the nightmare of an eternity without true life... It's been over a month since I have, and I'm so damned proud. It's actually a flash, but it's still complete:) Less than 300 words, but they are a very satisfying 300 words. I'm so darned proud of myself:) February 1, 2003: February is just beginning, so I'll have to make a strong push to finish ALL my goals this month. The 8 crits won't be hard, neither will submitting a short story, if one of mine gets rejected this month. The hard part is the writing a new short story... my attempts thus far have been mediocre... never more than 900 words, and when I get on a roll, I hate the direction I'm going. With my attempted sequal to "Wrath of a goddess" we're looking at a book because there's just too much to tell.... sigh Januray 22, 2003: Well I didn't count how many words it was, but I finished Ch 6 and am revamping Ch 7. It's mostly there, but I need to decide how to ease into the info I've already typed... I think it should be a long gap, maybe even pushing Ch7 back to Ch 8, but my creativeness is on hyatus, so I'm procrastinating... As for my short story... haven't touched it. Hope to get my muse back by this weekend so I can meet that goal. But now that "Through My Chosen Doorway" was rejected by Cafe Irreal I've submitted it to Strange Horizons... a long-shot, I know, but I'm running out of places that habitually accept flash fiction. So anyway, that finishes my Jan goal for submitting... I had planned on submitting "Wrath of a Goddess" this month, but I'm still unsure of it... January 13, 2003: Well I felt like I accomplished alot this weekend, despite my concern over Wrath's reviews... I completed Ch 3 of Laurin, along with a more focused outline of what's going to happen... I've also decided, for the first time, that I'm going to break it down into four sections, the first one simply title "Part 1: Laurin". It's my goal for the day (since my boss is out on Mondays) to finish Ch 4 and possibly finish my newest short... depending on where my muse is about lunch time. Chapter 4 of Laurin is complete now- it had been a barebones section from Ch 3 and now is 14 pages all its own. Ch 5 is finished, now, too, and Ch 6 is well on it's way... I wrote almost 5400 words today! Boy, do I feel productive. I'm so proud of myself. January 12, 2003: Today was kind of a let down... I spent last night revising my short story "Wrath of a Goddess", which had previously gotten wonderful reviews... I reposted it on OWW, and the first and only two reviews both said I was transparently pronouncing that man cannot handle science and that the only solution would be to destroy the world and start over with no science. I'm just blown away by this and don't know what to think. This was my next short story to submit, and it isn't looking favorable... when just two days ago everyone seemed to like it. So I've asked some friends to take a look at it and see if it's just those two people... if so, I'll keep it. If not, I don't know what to do. I don't want anyone to think my stories cry out for an end to science, but I think it's a good story. Both reviewers even said it was well written... sigh. January 8, 2003: Well, like most people, I've set some New Year's Resolutions for myself, most of which revolve around writing. My biggest goal is to write and submit one short story a month. I've already started this month's short story, which I *think* will be called "Death of a Goddess". I've put in 850 words yesterday, and expect it to be about 2500 words long... so we'll see. So if I finish that and submit one of the other stories I've already workshopped, I'll be good to go for January:) December 26, 2002: Well as a writer and a reviewer I felt very productive today. I wrote an entire 1000 word short story, and reviewed eight short stories written by other people. The holidays were good, the chaos is dying down, and I look forward to more time to write and review in the very near future.... December 20, 2002: I think I've recovered from TTT movie shock:) and that's both a good and a bad thing. The euphoria of a magical experience is a sad thing to lose, but now I can concentrate on work, writing, and most importantly- today at least- on my daughter, who turned 5 today. What a child she is! We let her open some presents last night and she kept saying "It's what I've always wanted!" And when she opened the new bed set we bought her, she looked at us and said, "You shouldn't have!" Priceless. December 19, 2002: I am still recovering from my viewing of The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers. As usual, an epic fantasy film has left me feeling tingly and lightheaded with the possibilities... It's almost as if the magic of the movie unlocked the door to my own magical cavern, and if only I knew how to enter, I could fly. Only a few rare movies make me feel this way, but it's a wonderful experience. Okay, so maybe it's the DayQuil, but I feel like I'm drowning in possibility. I can SEE so many things to write about, but my mind is so fuzzy it's hard to concentrate on making these visions into words. Here's my sole attempt of the day: All life flows from one everlasting stream, and all dying spirits fall like rain upon the land before returning once again to that stream's waters. As each day dawns, new life is born, just as the ancients of the land fade with the coming dusk. It's the rythm to which the land's heart beats, and the measure of time's passing. |
| Jenn's
Realm |
Jenn's
BLOG |
Jenn's
Works |
| Monthly Memo |
Favorite
Links |
Photo
Album |
| Flash Me Magazine |
The
Author Realm |
Sign
the Guestbook |
