Rating:PG-16

Dean received a call from Courtney as soon as he left the house. He went straight to the airport where a ticket waited for him. Jason was in the hospital again for his asthma and Courtney really thought it looked bad for their son. He was angry with Cassie so he did not call her right away but once he sat on the plane a while he realized how much he loved her. He was sure he could convince her to keep the baby though he didn’t have any idea that that was not necessary.

Cassie checked all of the Dean’s regular hangouts and returned home a couple of hours later frustrated. John had phoned her mother and she was waiting when Cassie came in the door. Sam and Sara had taken the kids out for the night to give Cassie time with her mom while John watched television in the living room.
“Mom, it was so stupid I was unsure and he didn’t want to listen. He really thinks I would give up our baby,” Cassie said as she sat at the table across from her mother.
“Honey Dean loves you, he will come around. He may be hurt but if he thinks about it, he will know your heart. He knows how much you love him.”
“But Mom things were going so well now this confusion, I am afraid I could lose him this time.”

At the hospital, Dean went in to see Jason and was surprised by all the tubes in the little boy. The tubes seemed to be helping him breath; he looked weak and frail. Dean touched his hand and he opened his eyes to smile at him.
“Hi Buddy, Daddy is here,” he said to Jason as Courtney snuck a peek from the door. Her son with his father, that is how it should be, she thought.
Dean’s cell phone vibrated and he saw it was his Dad but he ignored it because he didn’t know how long he would have Jason. If Courtney was telling the truth, the little boy was in bad shape. He left the room after a few minutes to go find the doctor but to also use the phone.

“Done so soon?” Courtney asked once he was in the hall.
“I’ll be back just some things I need to take care of,” he said as he went toward the hospital doors.
“Yeah Dad, what’s up?” he asked his father gruffly.
“What do you mean what’s up? You just walked out on your family, have you forgot them so soon?”
“I really don’t want to go into this now I have kind of an emergency here.” “Here? Where are you?”
“In California, Jason is in the hospital and they don’t think he will make it. Tell Cassie one of the kinks in her life may be done with,” Dean said before he hung up. John wasn’t going to replay what Dean said to Cassie only the basics. There was no reason to upset her. As far as he was concerned, she was still caring a Winchester baby and he didn’t want her upset. Dean may have forgotten that but he wouldn’t. It was bad enough he would have to relay that Dean had left town to go see his illegitimate son.

Cassie left a message for Dean after John told her of his wherabouts. “Honey please forgive me, but I promise I never thought of not having this baby. I was angry with myself for feeling that it was bad time and I guess I felt it was only right if you were angry with me too. There just wasn’t enough time to explain to you before you were out the door. I hope Jason gets better and I do understand that you had to go to him. I love you; please call me as soon as you can.”

The first time he listened to Cassie’s message he was in the waiting room while Courtney visited their son he had just put away the cell phone when he saw the nurses run into Jason’s room. The next thing he saw was Courtney as she came out in tears.
“He’s gone, Dean he is gone.”
He felt heart sick as he hugged Courtney who he didn’t seem to have any connection to at all. How could his young son just die? Was it a Winchester curse? Was his family still under a death sentence? What of his other children? Cassie? Maybe he should go on a quest like the one his father had done. Courtney stared at him as it hit her Dean really wasn’t interested in her despite them having shared a child.

Later that evening he finally phoned Cassie after he had listened to the message at least four times. He was ready to talk to her at after two in the morning. The phone only rang once before she picked up.
“Cas?”
“Hey.”
“I’m sorry I jumped to conclusions earlier. I should have known better, but the way you were acting surprised me. I knew you were pregnant, all the signs were there I was just waiting for you to tell me.”
“I was kind of put out that I could be pregnant when we tried so hard to avoid it.”
“It happens but we can do this, right?”
“Of course we can. How is Jason?”
“He died earlier it seems surreal, I still can’t believe it. He was so young and sweet. I hope its not some sort of family curse, I really do.”
“I’m sorry, Sweetie, he was a good little kid.”
Dean could tell she was tearing up he didn’t want her to be upset but he knew she was fond of Jason so he gave her a moment to gather herself. It seemed so senseless for such a little one to die. He loved Jason and it hurt to think he would never see him again.
“Will you come for the funeral in a few days?”
“Of course, I will be there for you, absolutely.”

There was a knock on the door. Cassie asked who would be coming by so late. “It’s Courtney she is in the room next door; I didn’t want her to be alone, Cas, she is hurting. I am afraid she may try to do her self in.”
“Oh.”
“You trust me, right?” “I do,” she said without hesitation, of course she didn’t trust Courtney not to use any opportunity to pull Dean in, even guilt.
“I should get the door. I will call you in the morning when I get details, okay?”
“Okay, Good night, I love you.”
“I love you too.”

Courtney came in the room.
“Talking to your wife?”
“Yes. How are you holding up?”
“Not well,” she said as she pulled him to her for a hug.
Dean pushed her away. This was not why she was there. He decided raiding the mini bar was a better idea. Courtney drank and talked as Dean listened half-heartedly. When she had what he, thought was plenty he guided her back to her room and let her fall on her bed. He slept on the sofa just in case she needed help throwing up. He refused to let her kill herself on his watch something she had threatened to do earlier. Courtney woke up with a killer headache and rushed to the rest room to vomit. Dean heard her moving around and went to his room before she could see he had stayed to watch over her. He didn’t need her to try to use this incident to show he really cared for her. He also didn’t want her to bring it up in front of Cassie.

Cassie brought Dean’s good suit so he wouldn’t stand out in his jeans and he appreciated the effort though jeans were more comfortable for him. He was impatient on the morning of the funeral not knowing what to do with his anger at his son having been taken from him. Cassie tried to help him with his tie and he pushed her away.
“You aren’t doing it right,” he said angrily as he looked in her sad face.
“Okay you should do it,” she said as she went to step away from the bathroom.
He stopped her with a hand to the shoulder.
“I’m sorry but I hate this; how can your God let a child die this way. Am I such a horrible person?” he asked not wanting an answer yet sorely needing one.
Cassie shook her head, “I don’t know Dean, I really don’t. However, I do know God didn’t take Jason it’s this world we live in that is evil. No, I don’t think this is to punish you or Courtney but things just happen. All we can hope for is that we will some day see the reason.”
He hugged her.
“Forgive me; I know you loved him too.”

The funeral was especially sad since Jason was so young.
A few people got up to say things about the little one. His baby sitter, his grand parents who finally came in town for the event, his mother then Dean. When it was his turn, he stood uncomfortably at the podium. Why had he said he would speak? He knew why because he loved his children and now one of them was gone forever. He would never see him grow up, fall in love, have a date or get married. Jason’s life was over. He hated that fact worse than anything that had gone on before.

“As Jason’s father who is not married to his mother I have had a limited amount of time with him though I did the best I could. Mostly I shared my family with him and we could see he was a happy easygoing young child. We enjoyed having him visit with his half brother and sister. I will personally miss him the rest of my life but one thing I will always remember is his ready smile,” he said as the tears threatened to over take him. He put forth a grim smile as he sat back down beside Cassie. Sam and Sara had come also to support Dean and he appreciated their presence.

At the gravesite, the pastor said a few words before the lowered the little casket in the ground. Sam watched Dean as he looked at something near the pastor’s foot. He looked toward Dean who seemed transfixed then he turned to his younger brother. His eyes seemed glazed and Sam went to stand beside him.
“Dean what’s wrong?”
“Jason’s ghost, it’s glaring at Courtney,” he whispered.
Sam looked at Dean for a moment he thought he was joking.
“Dean that’s not funny.”
His brother stared at him with a grim look on his face.
“Sam I am serious, but I will not salt and burn my own son. Let him haunt her.”