Flushed away
Mood:  d'oh
Now Playing: Smokey's greatest hits
Sorry about the lack of update yesterday, my trip to the proctologist took a bit longer than expected.
I don't know how many of you lot have ever visited a proctologist recently, it's the ideal job for a f&cking poof who enjoys shoving his fingers up someones arse all day long, and I wasn't too sure about this geezer I went to see yesterday. First off the rainbow coloured flag above the door should have set alarm bells ringing, then when I walked in there the f*cking music drove me mad. f*cking YMCA played over and over again. When I finally did get to see the quack, he wasn't interested in my Mossad Health Insurance details, he wanted cash upfront and wouldn't give me a receipt. I also don't know many quacks who dress all in leather either.
Anyway to cut a long story short, this quack really did need to learn a few things about hygiene. He wasn't even going to wear gloves, and after I complained the only ones he did have were the individual finger types. I think I was a problem case though, as he kept muttering to himself that I was a little tight for a good fisting. Still he obviously knew what he was doing, and the cause of my blockage was found. I'd forgotten that when we fought the Six Day war we all kept an Uzi clip concealed somewhere for an emergency. No wonder I'd been shitting bullets for the last few days!
Even though he asked me to come back so he could loosen me up a bit more, I don't think I'll be going back, he's done his job as far as I'm concerned, plus I'm walking a bit funny, I'm sure that will pass.
It's good though as I can now partake in Bagels after a few days break, and I'm going to treat myself with an extra helping. Then I'm going to write a nasty letter to the Mossad Insurance Programme telling them about this quack's hygiene policy, I don't think it's the level of service us agents should be getting.

Shalom