A rare update
Mood:  not sure
Now Playing: Secret Army
With updates now rarer than an honest politician - or as one wag at work put it, rarer than an honest word out of my mouth...cheeky c*nt) I bet you're all hoping for some bumper update full of juicy gossip and even some real life intelligence which has been gathered by yours truly.
Well I'm going to disappoint, the main reason I haven't been around is because I'm a tight fisted bastard who isn't willing to pay for his Internet, and all those c*nts round Tooting have got wise to me nicking their stuff and applied some security measures. Plus during the week while climbing a post to get a better signal, the laptop fell out of my saddlebag and broke, although the wire coathanger sticking out of the side took most of the impact. Luckily for me, I know lots of geezers in the TV game, and one of them does the Special Effects for Blue Peter. It's amazing what he's managed to do with an old bog roll holder, an empty box of Kosher Flakes and some Sellotape. I think Mossad should sign him up, and I'll be recommending him to Tel Aviv next time I go over there for debriefing.
So I'm taking no more chances this weekend, I'm not using coathangers anymore, I've rigged up a contraption on the front of my bike - OK it's a supermarket trolley - and I have a wire running from there to the laptop. Supermarket trolleys make great aerials it turns out, but make sure you use the metal kind and not the plastic ones. I made that mistake at first. The only thing that pissed me off was the pound I had to use to get the thing out and away from Tesco's car park. Still sometimes you have to speculate to accumulate.
I was thinking of spending some time on my farm in Kent which is one of my best kept secrets. I cycled down there the other day and found a load of those thieving gippo bastards have set up camp on my land. That should be dealt with next week, I've fed to co-ordinates of the place into the Israeli Air Force computer, and I know they've got bombing practice next week. I did have to say it was a Palestinian camp and not a gippo one but to me they're the same thing.
Anyway I'm off shopping, should be back tomorrow with some more bullshit.

Shalom