Mood:  lazy

I've been getting a bit lax in bringing this up to date. Lots of reasons, first off the bottles of Domestos had to be secured last Sunday after someone tried to steal one of them. Now I'll admit to nicking the odd bog roll from the hospital traps, although I try to time my craps to when I'm there, but I don't nick the cleaning stuff, especially when it's in short supply.

The other reason was that some c*nt nicked the pump that was on my bike, and because the tyres were a little low I had to blow them up myself. I'm well pissed off about it as it was a special bike pump awarded to me by Golda Maier herself for my efforts in capturing 20,000 Egyptians single handedly during the Six Day War. I don't talk about that incident much but it took me forever to get the sand out of my bike shorts, that's why I switched to Tanks later on. Anyway it made me late getting to the Bagel Bake (I don't care what the f*cking Evening Standard want to call it) and by the time I got back I decided not to bother typing anything. If anyone tries to sell you a white plastic bike pump with Hebrew writing on it, let me know and I'll be round there in a flash.

I'm going to try and get down the Synagogue later on, the rumour mill reckons we're going to have a different bloke doing the service today after the Polish guy did a runner. Apparently he can earn a bit more on a building site lugging bags of concrete around, he didn't think much of the idea of getting the proceeds of the collection plate as his payment...well it's a building full of Jewboys, how much did he think he would earn? These f*cking Eastern Europeans, mind you at least they try and work for a living unlike some of the lazy parasites I see hanging around...enough about NHS employees though.

OK, I'm going to sit back and wait for you lot to get in touch about my bike pump.

Shalom