"The trio even happier with Classie Freddie Blassie after dispatching some pencil necked geeks."

       In a move that has abruptly toppled the delicate balance of the Iraqi post-war climate, the Iron Sheik, along with the support of his tag-team partner, his deadly Sheik Attack and the full support of the Ayatollah Khomeini, has swiftly vested sovereignty from the Coalition of the Willing.  According to our behind-the-scenes NUEVO! correspondent Geraldo Rivera, U.S. troops pulled out at 16:23 from their stronghold in Baghdad (coordinates at 108Lat 39Lon).  Interestingly, former WWF wrestling manager "Classie" Fred Blassie was also spotted during the takeover on the side of the Iron Sheik et al.  As always, George W Bush has swiftly and resolutely responded to the crisis, appointing the modern World Wrestling Federation's founder Vince MacMahon to the Commanding Officer position of Operation Wrestlemania XXVII, Bush's military response to the recent coup.  "We need to respond to these menacing threats in a way that makes it fun for me.  I got this whole Wrestlemania idea from this new Oral-B toothbrush I got with like these neon bristles and funny cartoons on it.  It makes brushing fun, " he stated to White House reporters at a conference this morning.  The nature of Operation Wrestlemania XXVII has caused much speculation that this troublesome logjam will be resolved not through the waging of traditional warfare, but rather by a rematch between the Iron Sheik and American spokeswrestler "The Incredible" Hulk Hogan.  This notion has wrestling devotees in a nationwide anticipatory constipation for such an ideal showdown.  Unfortunately, Hulk Hogan was unable to be contacted COS' HE'S RUNNIN' FROM MACHO MAN RANDY SAVAGE COME ON HOGAN DON'T BE SCURD, YOU'RE RUNNIN' FROM MACHO THAT'S WHAT I HEARD.  DUDE, PLEASE, YOUR PAPERVIEW EVENT WAS A JOKE, AND YOU'RE AVOIDIN' RANDY SAVAGE COS' YOU KNOW YOU'LL GET SMOKED.