Tentative schedule
Mood:  quizzical
Topic: Update
Dad heard from a person named Donna at the BMT department yesterday. She said he should be there for a FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 16 appointment in the morning for lab work and an appointment with an infectious disease specialist. He's waiting to hear if he can see the same type of specialist at Merit Care in Fargo instead. My guess is they want to assure he doesn't get another infection from the catheter (Hickman port), so they'll probably insist he sees the doctor at the U of M.

Not sure yet if that means he starts the transfusion immediately after this appointment or what. We were told by the Nurse Coordinator that "most of the staff there will be at a conference in Keystone Colorado from Tuesday the 6th through the 13th, so we assume that's one of the reasons for the delay.

The cats, Shadow and Crystal, made the journey on Sunday to John's place in Chaska with relative ease. They were let out of their travel cages once we hit the freeway and they kept Cortnie, Megan and Samantha warm and occupied the whole way back. They (kitties) weren't too sure about their new surroundings for the first couple of days - lots of meows, increased ankle rubbing, and more bed switching than Goldilocks - but they seem to have acclimated well enough. The downside (for John) is having to take allergy medications for the next 3-4 months. The girls are excited to have them here, which I immediately used to get their commitments to help clean the litterbox and cat hair off the furniture. The upside is that I have to dust less because cats explore remote places and come out covered in cobwebs, so it's like having a robot Swiffer-Sweeper. I know Dad misses them dearly and wishes he'd kept them there a bit longer...

Copy of email from Wes
Mood:  caffeinated
Topic: Update
Although son John wrote an update yesterday to the website "blog", I'll add to it since I'm home for an extended weekend, waiting for the telephone call from the nurse coordinator at the University-Fairview Hospital in Minneapolis (soon) to tell me when to return there for my bone-marrow transplant.

A week ago my twin brother Warren & I drove to the Twin Cities for the preliminary tests scheduled for him on Monday, Jan. 29, & for me the remainder of the week. Warren returned to Fargo Monday night & I came here with son John & his 3 daughters Friday evening, following a two-hour consultation with my "workup" doctor, Dr. Majhail, a hematologist at the University hospital. As John's "blog" reports, all those necessary test results were satisfactory, except for some heart damage, which the doctor thought minimal enough to warrant going ahead with the transplantation procedures. It's referred to as BMT, & there is a backlog of patients waiting, so I was sent home & will know which day I'll need to report back, sometime this coming week, according to my nurse.

On day #1 I will receive the Hickman catheter inserted into my right shoulder, followed by 5 days of chemotherapy & other (facilitating) drugs, followed by full-body radiation. Day 7 is the day of transfusion, giving me stem cells from my brother Warren, which I discovered is actually DAY #1 of the 100-day countdown, NOT beginning on discharge day. I will be hospitalized for approximately 4 weeks, depending on my recovery time, the success of the transplant, etc., but with a suppressed immune system & isolation in my room will be a part of my stay in the hospital.

I was told the telephone # I'd given you all earlier may not be very direct to the floor, so until I know more, calls to the nurse's station are discouraged, &
you'll have to call my siblings at the telephone numbers I'd given you on January 22, okay? My cell-phone is NOT allowed within the hospital, & plants or flowers aren't allowed, due to mold, etc. I'll be encouraged to walk (treadmill or in halls), bike on a stationary bike, eat regular but small amounts of food & drink plenty of fluids during my hospital stay. Visitors are welcome, but restricted (3 at a time) to those who are well, & children not allowed under a certain age. Washing ones hands before entering the room is required, & I might have to wear a mask at times? I'll use my laptop to receive messages more than to send them, so this may be my last update until sons John and/or Joel send updates again?

It is a scary time for me, but I'm hopeful & thankful for the option of renewed health soon, & a life ahead that is free of cancer.

Thank you for caring concern, & prayers for me!

Wes

It's a GO...
Mood:  incredulous
Now Playing: By John
Topic: Update
"The good news," said Dr. Majhail, "is that both your bone marrow biopsy and spinal tap show 0% blasts, meaning the cancer is still in remission."

Dad let out an audible sigh of relief.

"Your twin brother is also an 8-by-8 donor match, the best possible through HLA blood protein-typing," he continued. "However..."

We waited for the other shoe to drop.

"Your heart has suffered some damage," the turban-wrapped hematologist stated matter-of-factly. "

I was attending Dad's final meeting after his week-long screening process of test upon test upon test. The purpose was to determine his overall "fitness" for a Bone Marrow Transplant. The risk factors and procedure percentages the doctor threw out at us were mind-numbing.

- Four to five out of ten BMT patients live and are Leukemia-free in one year.
- Twenty to thirty percent of BMT patients die in the first six months.
- Fifty percent get "early" or acute Graft-Versus-Host-Disease.
- Twenty-five percent develop life-long, irreversible chronic GVHD.
- The donor marrow may fail to "take" or engraft, which may be fatal.
- The bone marrow may recover too slowly, or not at all, and infections or bleeding may not be able to be stopped resulting in death.

Possible side-effects from the combinations of drugs include fever, skin rash, nausea, low blood pressure, vomiting, diarrhea, malaise, fluid retention, wheezing, seizures, hair loss, mouth sores, sterility, kidney failure, coma, brain damage, irreversible damage to vital organs, hemorrhagic cystitis, cardiomyopathy...

"What if he waited to see if the Leukemia comes back," I asked. "Or went with the old method of consolidation chemotherapy treatments?"

The doctor ran his fingers through his thick, black beard. "It would probably come back within 4-to-8 months," he replied. "And when it eventually did return, the cancer would be more aggressive and much harder to treat."

In Dad's favor: his relatively good health (for a 66-year-old), best possible donor match, the reputation of the U of M BMT transplant center, the intermediate chromosome verifying the AML versus CMML diagnosis...

Against his success: side-effects, percentages, some lack-of-oxygen damaged tissue in the apex of his heart, the septic infection he developed from the last Hickman port they installed...

Probable. Possibly. Likelihood. Slight occurrence. Chance of. Risk of. Tendancy... His answers had all these words mixed in. Ultimately, we got the picture. Do nothing, cross your fingers, hope and pray. Or go through with the BMT, cross your fingers, hope and pray.

Nobody spoke for a minute while Dad pondered everything that had been presented to him.

"So, do you understand everything I've explained to you?" he asked both of us.

I glanced over at Dad. He nodded. I followed suit.

"And do you want to proceed with the transplant?" the doctor posed.

"Yes," Dad said, then paused. "I've thought about it, and I think it's the best option."

Immediately the room actually felt brighter, the air a bit less weighty, the lump in my throat dissolved, and I blinked rapidly while having to look away. I don't know how to explain what happened, but for the rest of the 2-hour appointment, Dad and I laughed, shared, joked, and talked with the doctor like we'd known him for a lifetime. He listened intently to Dad's questions. He complimented me on the research I'd done about the transplant. He actually seemed interested in our stories. He was patient and kind trying to explain complicated procedure in layman's terms. He was optimistic, confident, humane, personable, and gave every impression that he cared about Dad's condition and concerns.

In the end, he helped Dad feel like he'd made the right decision.

Mid-week news
Mood:  a-ok
Now Playing: By Wes through John
Topic: Update
I've been at the Days Inn University (612-623-3999) since Sunday night. Brother Warren and I drove down and followed Joel and Dori part of the way.

Monday started at 10:30 am sharp with a meeting, some tests for Warren and I, and background info from everybody involved. Warren's daughter, Kelly, joined us for dinner before he headed back to Fargo. I'm learning the shuttle schedules back-n-forth from the hotel and the complex tunnel system from building-to-building.

Tuesday was very busy. Bone density test, blood tests, irradiation test, pulmonary function test, tests with letters and acronyms I can't remember... Meetings with doctors, nurses, social worker, and aides. Moved from one hospital to another, from one clinic to another all day. Finding my way around this massive complex slowly but surely.

Can't believe how tired I am at night...

Wednesday will be another full day of tests-n-meetings too, but Thursday is free and open. Ed Karels and I plan to meet for lunch sometime that day. Friday's last meeting with the main transplant doctor is at 1:00 pm. John will attend and then drive me to Chaska to pick up his girls prior to us heading back up to the lake for the long weekend.

I don't know the actual day I need to be back to start the transplant - they are "backed up." Looks like maybe Tuesday, more likely Wednesday, or possibly Thursday.

Joel & Dori's Weekend Visit
Mood:  happy
Topic: Update
Saturday we drove up north to spend the day with Dad. Arrived just before supper time. As usual, Dad had dinner guests which included: Al & Becky, Dori and myself, Bonnie Hanson & Pastor Jim McBride. We had a wonderful ham dinner and apple pie for dessert. We played 18-holes (two games) of the card game Golf. Really enjoyed the evening and I was especially happy to see Dad enjoying himself. He never use to play cards or games with us much, so is was great to see him playing and have so much fun!
Sunday uncle Warren arrived in the afternoon to pick up Dad for their trip to the University of Minnesota. Al & Becky sent us all off and we followed each other most of the way to the cities. We stopped a Culver's (one of all of our favorites)for dinner and parted ways for the remainder of the trip.
The weekend went quick, but we spent some quality time with the family. Pastor Jim said a wonderful prayer Saturday evening after cards that really gave me hope and encouragement for Dad and his upcoming bone marrow transplant. I thank god for all the support Dad has up north and I'm very thankful for all the sacrifices friends and family have made.
Lastly, I'm so proud of my Dad and his courage at battling his cancer & I really think he's made the right choice at doing the bone marrow transplant, because it gives him a much better chance at living a longer, normal life and beating the cancer.
God Bless you All-
Joel & Dori

More BMT Details
Mood:  chatty
Now Playing: Highlights of Wes Email
Topic: Update
The nurse coordinator at the U of M medical center, Tim, called again with more information. As did the social worker, Leah, whom we had the initial meeting with that Friday morning after meeting to Dr. Linda Burns. The answers I got yesterday were vague, but they said get specifics back to me today or tomorrow?

Tim's first statement was that he was waiting for my call about which sibling would be the donor, so they could schedule that person along with me for next week. I did tell him last week it would probably be my twin brother, Warren, since he really wanted to do it, was first to get approval, and probably in the best health. After covering this, he said he'd schedule Warren for next Monday (half day of blood work, etc.) and that I was to report at 10:30 a.m. that Monday, coming in each day as an out-patient. I will know each day what the next day's schedule is, but there wouldn't be a bone-marrow biopsy on Monday - probably another day in the week? He implied that I might be done as early as Thursday and it would then be that day I'd meet with the doctor(s). He also said they are "backed up" and my next procedures might not start until mid-week of
that week beginning February 5th. I said do you mean Wednesday instead of Tuesday and he said I would know when I got to the clinic on Monday, January 29th, as would Warren about his schedule for the second week.

This may all seem confusing now, but Warren and I will plan to drive down Sunday afternoon, check in to a motel, and be "ready" for all our tests Monday morning. I'm still waiting to hear about housing for my 100-day stint after the initial hospitalization. Tim was able to answer some of my questions about the outcome of my tests at Fargo, but most were medical terms that made little sense to me.

I might attend Wally Redmann's memorial service in Fargo Friday morning with Verna, depending on her schedule and the weather that day.

Copy of email from Wes
Mood:  cool
Now Playing: By Wes
Topic: Update
It's Monday noon, Jan. 22, & I received notice from a nurse coordinator at the University of MN clinic-hospital that (1) all 3 of my siblings were a "match" as donors for the blood-marrow transplant. It appears that my twin, Warren, will be the one to donate, with brother Al & sister Verna as back-up donors, if his physical & other tests don't measure up? I also was told (2) that I am to report to the University hospital on MONDAY, January 29, for preliminary tests & procedures, so Warren & I will drive down together on January 28.
The only telephone # I have is 612 / 273 - 2800, which is NOT a direct line to me. While hospitalized, mail can be addressed to me, c/o U of M Medical Center, Fairview, PCU 4A or 4B, 500 Harvard Street S.E., Minneapolis, MN 55455, which should be good for 4-6 weeks. After being discharged from the hospital, I will move to an off-site apartment for the next 100 days, with checkups daily at the clinic & 24/7 "care" from a family member or friend. While in isolation, visitors will be restricted, I'm told? Prayers welcome! Wes

All quiet on the Western front...
Mood:  quizzical
Now Playing: From John
Topic: Update
Not much new news to report from Camp Lida:

Still waiting on final details and logistics from the BMT Center at the U of M.

Finally got the Thanksgiving meal he'd missed while in the hospital in Fargo.

Cards and updates nearly all mailed out.

Joel (and Dori?) coming up this upcoming weekend.

Dahdada-dahdada-dah.

T minus 12 and counting...
Mood:  hug me
Now Playing: BMT timeline and schedule
Dad got a call from the BMT Center yesterday...

Turns out Al and Verna also were also donor matches, so now it's up to them to decide who is the best candidate. Paper, scissor, rock anyone?

They also informed him that his "paperwork" is complete and they'd like Dad to start his pre-screening on Monday, January 29th. The donor will also have to be down there sometime that week to get a once-over.

From what we've been told, the donor will be given a shot (or pills) that will 'trick' their bone marrow into over-production and release the needed stem cells into their bloodstream. They will then be hooked up to a "blood filter" that pulls out exactly what they need for the BMT and pump the remaining blood right back into them. This filter-via-machine process could go on for a period of several days until they have enough. Worst case scenario, they will have to sedate the donor and perform minor surgery in the pelvis area to extract the necessary volume of transfusion material.

The actual Bone Marrow Transplant is scheduled to begin on Monday February 5th. That week Dad will get two different chemotherapy drugs, three "study" drugs to reduce potential rejection of the transplant, and a full-body irradiation treatment. This 'Reduced Intensity' BMT is specifically designed for older adults (56-70) and instead of 'killing off' a patient's immune system, it is intended to just 'suppress' it instead, thus reducing some risks of a traditional BMT.

Then, they will 'transplant' the donor material and wait. There are many potential complications (20% of BMT patients die) and a host of side-effects (rejection, host-vs-donor syndrome, infection, etc.), but Dad has faith that the probable result (a cure and longer life) outweighs the risks. He's heard stories from many BMT patients who are living happy, productive lives many years after their procedure.

He will be confined to an environmentally enhanced isolation room for 4-6 weeks once the BMT starts. He cannot leave his room. No cell phones allowed. They will deliver meals to him. Family who wish to spend short visits with him must be virus and infection free. Everybody who comes in contact with him must wear a surgical mask, latex gloves, and take extra precautions.

So, other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how was the play?

My suggestion is that, if you've thought about calling him, do it. After the 5th, it may be a while before he's up to par again.

Bargaining...
Mood:  crushed out
Now Playing: By John
Topic: Update
Dad lay motionless in his hospital bed in the ICU at Merit Care, surrounded by beeping machines and tangled in numerous tubes. In an effort to lessen the load on his heart, they had forced nearly 30 pounds of fluid retention and he looked eerily like his father, Walt. He'd been there nearly five days and had been unconscious for most of that time. It had been about 24 hours since they decided to give him a "sedation-vacation," but there was still no sign of him improving, much less waking up. His vital signs teetered near critical stages and his white blood cell count was dangerously low. The heaving sound of the respirator drowned out the relaxing music we had playing in the background. To describe the mood as somber would be a vast understatement. Even the nurses, who were normally chipper and chatty, dropped their eyes or found something else to do when entered his room.

We'd just come back from a family meeting with the Critical Care doctor who had informed us that "it doesn't look good..." A septic infection, compounded by fluid around the lungs, pending kidney failure, heart damage, and a low immune system had combined to put Dad's fate beyond the care of modern medicine and into the hands of God.

It was a defining moment for me.

My upbringing and personal walk of faith had taught me that, when I talk to God, I should focus on being thankful for the blessings I already have (Prayer of Jabez, 1 Corinthians 4:10). Nevertheless, as I stood next to Dad in that gloomy near-dark room, I found myself asking (and begging) for His help and promising Him I'd do certain things or make specific changes to my life if He came through. Many of my prayers started with, "Dear God, if you make Dad better, I will..." Psychologists and counselors refer to this as "bargaining," one of the five stages of dealing with death.

It's now time for me to make good on those promises. God came through, big time! And as hard as it may be, I'd be a fool not to live up to my end of the bargain, because Dad is about to enter yet another high-risk phase of his treatment for Leukemia, the Bone Marrow Transplant. As the Attending Physician, Dr. Burns, told us during his initial consultation at the U of M, "this will be much more intense than what you've already been through."

I'd hate to find myself standing next to him again in a hospital room where complications put him once more in a life-or-death situation. Especially if I haven't yet made good on my promises to God, and specifically if I might need to call on Him again sometime soon. I'd hate to be the only one who hasn't made good on my "bargains" because miracles do happen...

Sunday, January 14th
Mood:  rushed
Now Playing: From Wes
Topic: Update
With some help from son John, I finished my belated Christmas Letter and 2007 Update today.

An email copy went out to those of you I have an current email address. If you didn't get it, and would like me to forward you a copy, send an email to me at: wesonlida@loretel.net

A printed copy is being mailed out over the next few days to the other 130+ for whom I have no
current (active) e-mail address, but heard from!

Al & Becky, John and I sat around this evening organizing forms, folders and paperwork for my upcoming bone-marrow transplantation. Son Joel is coming up to visit and help me further mid-week!

Thanks again to all of you for your thoughts, prayers, correspondence, and conversations! I hope
your holidays were special & memorable for you as
well. God willing, I'll be able to send Christmas
cards again in December, 2007! Happy New Year!

Remiss...
Mood:  chillin'
Now Playing: From John
Topic: Update
I apologize for being lax in posting updates since the last time, hoping that you all can understand and empathize with my post-holiday situation.

As cousin Kelly said to me today as I tried to explain why I've been remiss in my responsibilities of this blog, "I think everybody will understand that no news is goods news."

Dad's been gaining more independence, weight, and strength over the last couple of weeks. He's driving (except when he's alone at night, when the infamous deer are active, etc.). His appetite is coming back, things are tasting better, and the protein supplements seem to be increasing muscles and tone. He's lost his butt from the weight loss, but fits into jeans he hasn't worn in years.

Dad's trying to catch up on responding to emails, cards, and letters he's received from all of you. Between updating address books, visiting on the phone, monitoring the weather reports, daily chores, weekly obligations, and taking care of the cats, there's little time left over to plan and organize for the BMT.

Medically, he's been to Fargo for a few tests (stress, heart, etc.) to determine his overall fitness for the Bone Marrow Transplant (BMT). Brother Warren's donor test results came back, showing that he is a "perfect match" for the BMT. Once Verna and Al's results are in, the U of M will have the matching donor candidates come down there to determine who is the best match (based on their overall health, mental and physical).

As he puts it, "his oncologist and the BMT specialist agree that it's the right procedure because a BMT is a more permanent solution to hoping the Leukemia stays in remission." So, he's decided to proceed with it, baring any health setbacks or changes in his being considered a good candidate for the treatment.

Should everything move forward according to plan, he will be required to spend 4-6 weeks in isolation at the University of Minnesota hospital. Following that, he will need to spend an additional 100 days (+/-) near the U of M's BMT clinic for daily follow-up visits and aftercare. During this period, it is required that he have 24/7 adult supervision (to insure fevers, accidents, side-effects, etc. are dealt with immediately).

Many of you have said, "let me know if there is anything I can do to help out."

It's a lot to ask any one person to set their life on hold and spend 100 days 'babysitting' a post-BMT patient in a 2-bedroom apartment in the Twin Cities. I'm sure that, as we get nearer to that point, we'll put out an A.P.B. (all-points-bulletin) asking people if they'd be willing to back-fill or substitute as the 24/7 supervisor for a few days or a week.

Last Update until January 2nd
Mood:  a-ok
Now Playing: By John
Topic: Update
I talked to Dad on the phone tonight for the last time until January 2nd. My Mom and step-Dad planned an all-family western Caribbean cruise for the next 7 days that I'm taking my girls on. Dad's got Al & Becky, Pastor Jim, Bonnie Hanson, the Dahls, Barb Peterson, and many other neighbors on the beach that are there year-round to look after him, but I still had a hard time leaving him after our weekend together.

Dad says it feels really good to be home. He's trying not to get "too caught up in catching up." He's able to get around the house, take care of the cats, and do the daily tasks without too much effort. He's updating his email and address lists, and plans to send a belated Christmas letter out to everybody soon.

There's a lot of reading, paperwork, phone calls, and extra stuff to do prior to the Bone Marrow Transplant, so that is keeping him busy also.

If you get a chance over the next week, give him a call (218-863-8119) to catch up and say HI.

Merry Christmas!
Mood:  celebratory
Now Playing: From Wes (by John)
Topic: Update
FRIDAY, 12/22: Bone Marrow Transplant (BMT) Evaluation at the U of M was a mixed blessing. Won't know for 1-2 weeks whether I'm "accepted" as a BMT candidate. I still need to weigh the risks and benefits before I firmly decide whether to proceed or not. If so, their time line includes 1 week out-patient testing, a 4-6 week hospital stay in an isolation room, followed by 100 days (+/-) living in an apartment in Minneapolis under 24/7 "adult" supervision for daily checkups at the U of M clinic. The BMT is a permanent cure for Leukemia, but it's a numbers game (percentage-wise) on risks, complications, and potential side-effects.

SATURDAY, 12/23: Checked out of PVHC and moved back home to the lake. YEAH! The cats seem to be needier than usual. Drove to Billy's in Vergas for dinner with John.

SUNDAY, 12/24: Organized around the house prior to joining Bonnie Hanson and her crew for dinner. Attended Christmas services at Zion. Not much need for the cane anymore.

MONDAY, 12/25: Brother Warren stopped by this morning to visit. We're heading to sister Verna's in Fergus Falls for a family get-together this afternoon.

Mid-week Catch-up
Mood:  cheeky
Now Playing: From John
Topic: Update
The good news is, not much new to report!

Got Gail back on her airplane Monday. Ate somewhere, took pictures. Therapy continues to go well. Biopsy results were excellent. More day trips away from PVCH. Increased independence. Trepidation about Friday. Excited to finally move back home!

As Dad so eloquently puts it: dahdada-dahdada-dah...

His bone marrow transplant evaluation at the U of M is Friday, 8am sharp. Verna is driving Wes to meet Joel in Clearwater Thursday. Joel is coordinating a drop-off-exchange with John. Wes is staying in a hotel that night to avoid rush-hour traffic. I'll be attending the 3-hour eval with him, then driving both of us back up north where we'll "check out" of PVHC on Saturday and he'll settle back into his lake home. Sounds kind of like the baton in a 440M relay at a track meet...?

Dahdada-dahdada-dah.

Weekend News & Notes
Mood:  special
Now Playing: By John
Topic: Update
Wes and Al drove to Fargo Friday to pick up Gail at the airport. Shopping, errands, lunch, and a tour of PVHC ensued.

The Nerstrand crew arrived Saturday shortly before John and his girls. After a quick unloading, we car-pooled over to Spanky's to meet Al & Becky for dinner. The waitress listened attentively to multiple "one check, mine" directives, but eventually Joel & Dori treated before Wes or Al figured out where the bill went to.

Back to the cabin where Cortnie played Santa, distributing presents and Christmas cheer. New clothes, gadgets, trinkets, and cruise supplies abounded. Dad headed back to PVHC via the "Joel-shuttle" a little before 10pm while the girls played on computers and Gail napped on the couch.

Sunday morning came early for those that stayed up late watching Gaffigan on DVD, but it was worth the extra coffee. We were treated to Zion's Sunday School kids' Christmas pageant and play, followed by 'cake' and candy canes in the fellowship room. A long and treacherous Lost Highway 'shortcut' brought us to Vergas for brunch at The Loons Nest, shopping the antique stores, and back to the lake for football (Vikes suck) and eventual goodbyes.

I think we wore him out.

Baby Steps...
Mood:  sharp
Now Playing: From John
Topic: Update
All throughout this, Wes' family has batted around the phrase "Baby Steps." Like in the movie 'What About Bob,' it is meant to remind us that it's the little things - the daily improvements, the small-scale victories, even the minor challenges - that are truly important in the big scheme of things. The impetus of setting a goal (no matter how irrational or pie-in-the-sky) and the process of reaching that goal (no matter when or by whatever means) is what keeps us going forward as human beings. It brings us pride, strengthens our discipline, and builds self-confidence. All from one little Baby Step.

Yesterday, for example, Dad drove for the first time in more than six weeks. You'll have to ask his brother Al, who sat shotgun in the minivan, about the details (and how many drinks he had to have to calm his nerves afterward), but it's yet another example of a Baby Step that seemed impossible even a week ago.

Dad's gained 4 pounds since he arrived at PVHC, now topping the scales at a whopping 164#. Not bad, considering he went from 30# heavier (when they pumped him full of fluids in ICU and he looked a lot like mini-John) to 30# lighter than usual at his Merit Care discharge. Baby Step.

If you ask me, it's all about perspective and expectations. There are those of us that fret about Dad's ability to adequately care for himself once he's discharged from PVHC. There are those that are just happy we have options for his Leukemia treatment and thankful that he'll be around. There are some that worry about Dad becoming depressed from this whole situation, not to mention his being alone over a long, blustery winter at the lake. There are others who are just plain amazed at the outpouring of blessings, miracles, prayers, and support from friends and acquaintances. There are even those that hope Dad's near-death experience will trigger him to reassess what's most important to him and might even initiate some positive changes in his old daily routines.

Truth-be-told, does it really matter?

Baby Steps...

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change (other people, Leukemia, God's plan for me). The courage to change the things I can (my attitude, my health, my habits, my words, taking personal responsibility). And the courage to know the difference...

Baby Steps.

Gameplan, goals and options...
Mood:  cool
Now Playing: By John
Topic: Update
Wednesday's appointment at Merit Care was eventful, to say the least. Lots of tests, what's best, and rest. The highlight was when Dr. Gaba told him that she was at an oncology conference on Monday and Tuesday, discussed his case with her peers, and thinks that he is a good candidate for a "non-traditional, less aggressive" bone marrow transplant. She tentatively scheduled him for an Evaluation at the University of Minnesota's Transplant Center. He's still debating the pros and cons of this treatment option, but since it is only an evaluation and he might not pass their requirements anyway, he's leaning towards having the eval done.

Thursday's Discharge Meeting at PVHC went well. After hearing input from all sides, Dad decided that he's going to say there and take advantage of all the benefits/rehab through Friday the 22nd of December. He will then move back out to his Lake Lida home (YEAH!), but will be meeting with Hospice and Home Health Care between now and then to discuss options for them to help out in this transitional stage.

Doctor Appointment Day
Mood:  quizzical
Now Playing: By John
Topic: Update
Yawn... early-rising day for Dad. Al & Becky chauffeured him to Fargo for a long day of tests, doctor appointments, and consultations: blood work, bone needle biopsy, EKG/EEG, Q-n-A sessions, meeting with Dr. Gaba. We won't have the results for 3-4 days, so we wait and hope there are no further 'miscommunication' this time. We'll know more about his Consolidation treatment schedule once the test results are in and his oncologist narrows his chemotherapy options.

The Cancer Support Group is holding its monthly meeting at PVHC so that Dad can attend this evening. He was instrumental in getting the group to accept spouses of cancer patients into the fold, and it became an important part of Dad's support system for dealing with Mary's death. Now it will hopefully become an integral part of his own battle with The Big C.

Therapy continues to go very well. Craig's got him working a lot on squats and stairs to build his strength and get rid of the wobbly knee syndrome.

Verna is attending the weekly Thursday morning Discharge Meeting with the PVHC staff to discuss progress, gameplan, and support. Medicare has some strict rules regarding their financial assistance for nursing home patients and our family is hoping that Dad takes full advantage of his rehab stint before he attempts to move back out to the lake. It's an ironic situation because every time he's shown progress and makes strides (moving out of ICU, discharge from Merit Care, etc.), the "system" rewards him with less help and assistance. We know he likes to set optimistic goals and that he really wants to be home for the Holidays, but we're just worried that he might back-slide or that he's not quite ready to be on his own... just yet.

The good news is that Gail (Mary's daughter) will be joining us this weekend at the lake for our Christmas celebration! Verna is picking her up from the Fargo airport on Friday. She'll have Dad's minivan for transportation while she's here and has offers from plenty of "lake people" to keep her company. Joel, Dori, and Amy (and possibly her boyfriend) are heading up Saturday afternoon. Myself and the girls will leave the Cities after Samantha's dance team practice on Saturday. Dad's made a X-mas dinner reservation at Spanky's, followed by festive cheer and our traditional 'round-the-tree present exchange back at the lake. We'll attend church at Zion on Sunday with Dad, then do lunch at the Cornfield. Joel's and my family need to depart Sunday, whereas Gail is staying until Monday. Feel free to give us a call at the lake while we're there this weekend (218-863-8119) so say HI, catch up, or visit with Dad, if you want.

How To Contact Wes
Mood:  bright
Now Playing: From Son John
Many people have been wondering, "now that Wes is getting better, can I call him or is he up for visits?"

Dad has decided not to get a phone installed in his room at Pelican Valley Health Center (PVHC). I think it's because he doesn't plan to be there all that long and might also be enjoying the break from his unofficial title as "Mr. Congeniality." I tried to get him to use his cell phone, but he's determined to continue letting Al & Becky hang onto it instead.

At this point, we as a family would ask that, if you call PVHC directly, simply leave a message for Wes, as their nursing staff is tasked with more pressing care matters than tracking down Dad. He will get the message and return the call if time permits.

Best advice I can give is to continue using email for now. Becky is continuing to print emails that are sent to wesonlida@loretel.net and PVHC has a "Contact Residents" section on their web page. Simply 'copy' the following web address into your browser. They'll hand-deliver your message to Dad.

http://www.pelicanvalleyhealthcenter.com/contact_residents.htm

You can also click on "post your comment" on this web blog page, as I forward those to Dad also.

For those of you who are local, visits are wonderful. He's in Room #123, first patient door on the left, if you enter from the red canopy door. Visiting hours are flexible, but we've been told that you may have trouble accessing the building before 7 am and after 9 pm. If you arrive close to meal times, I'm sure he'd appreciate the company at the dinner table. The only other times he's not available are during Physical/Occupational Therapy, exercise times, Discharge Meetings, doctor/dentist appointments, and when he's gone on an occasional Day Trip. All I ask is that if Dad starts to show signs of fatigue, please respect that his energy level isn't what it used to be. Granted, he's become good at expressing when he's worn out, so if he 'suggests' that you "go downtown and grab a bite to eat" it's probably a sign that he's had enough...

Cards and letters can still be sent to his Lake Lida home or to PVHC.