I started out with 48,000 miles - 1 year and 9 months later, we're at 93,000 miles. She's a trooper, that's for sure. Lots and lots of urban, city, stop and go driving, and a fair share of crossing the state lines.
It's....it's her transmission. It's slipping. At first, no big deal, but then, getting worse and worse. Took it to the automatic transmission specialists - its an internal problem, big job, taking $2000 to $3000 dollars. Took it to my uncle's shop, said the same thing, just to clarify the first guy wasn't lying. Fortunately, it's still covered under the dealer, minus the $87 I have to pay for them to look at it. But it sure beats $2,500. It's her first problem in almost 50,000 miles. I'm not sure if I sure keep the car much longer. I drove the shit out of it. Most other cars would've exploded within days...
Well, its time to start searching for a new vehicle. I think I've narrowed the choices down to three...
THE PT CRUISER
The PT Cruiser is the bisexual of the automobile world. Not quite car, not quite truck, not quite van, no, this tacky car puts all three aspects in a blender and sets to purify. It's also not sure of its purpose either - is it supposed to be a family car? a racing car? a truck for hauling around antiques and lawnmowers?
Of course, throw some flames on it and it MUST be cool. PT Cruisers are the only modern cars in the world that people still draw flames on. Why? It doesn't make the car go any faster or look any cooler. IT'S A PT CRUISER, NOT A SPORTS CAR. It has one of the worst accelerations of a V6 in the world.
Well, probably won't get a PT Cruiser, since I'm not a 40 year old with 4 kids or a metrosexual. How about...
a BLIMP ?
No one really gives blimps props anymore. Who would have thought that thousands of compressed tons of gas would be go out of style? Imagine it - all you squares with your fast cars - a lot of good that would stuck in traffic or crossing a lake! Not with a blimp, assholes!!
Wait - don't they explode or something?
Okay, that's out. I figured out the perfect vehicle though...
M1 TANK
And you thought you guys were so bad ass - first with the Escalades, then came the Hummers, then the Roadster Semi - all will bow down before the mighty M1. Going to slow on the road grandma? BLAM! No problem. Annoying children crossing the road, taking their sweet time when you're running late for your next rehab session? Man the turrents! And your problem is solved. Who needs a horn? Why stop for traffic lights? Who's going to win in a crash, a 12 ton tank or a ultra fab plastic PT cruiser? Who's going to stop you? No one, that's who bitch!
I've been playing around with the payment options and figure I could pay roughly $25,000 a month for 80 years at 3.2% APR financing. Maybe around $24,999.45 if I trade in my car and put $1000 down....
The concept of grandmas exploding gets me off...
go to hell.
I'm going to drive a beater.