Name a good movie with a kid in it.
You probably thought of the Sixth Sense, and maybe Home Alone.
Think about it. Kids have two purposes in movies. Either doing something stupid or being inappropriately possessed. That's about it. Pick apart some movies - Jurassic Park, the kids did stupid things and Dr. Grant always had to save them. People always have to save kids, cause when shit hits the fan, they go and do something stupid. This is why there are so many children in comedies - cause they hope a child's stupidity will cause a laugh.
The only other child role is the "possessed" role, used in EVERY SINGLE HORROR FILM AFTER THE SIXTH SENSE. They always say the same stupid random things about how the horror demon or ghosts works - such as - "the monsters know you're scared" - or - "they don't like when you turn on the lights" - god, that's annoying, kids always refer to any monster or demon as "THEY", and then the adult, who already knows that stuff is getting out of hand, is dumb enough to humor the kid and ask, "Who are they?" or be like "What do you mean, THEY?". Sometimes you can replace THEY with THEM. Kids will just draw lame pictures of their family being dead or some other bullshit too to act scary. Kids aren't scary. They are stupid and eat their boogers. At least that's what I did.
If you want to make a movie good, make it longer. Make the movie so goddamn long that people will be bending over for you so they can be raped with your 20 Oscars (or film awards, whatever they are). I've noticed, the longer and more boring a movie is, the better praised it is by Hollywood. Titanic (3 hours) GENUIS, I mean, that part when the boat sank, I didn't see that coming. Lord of the Rings - A CINEMATIC MASTERPIECE, even though they left out that one scene at Gannondolf's wizard fortress where the king of the elves and the black knight and the hobbits talked about fate and magic spells, that movie was soooo great, all 9 hours of it. There's a difference between having a short attention span and being bored. How long can you really drag out a movie? I get it, the girl in Titanic is in love. I get it, Frodo is wetting himself since he has to fight pixies and goblins to save the world. How long can you really develop the characters before you just don't even care anymore?
How about they make a movie that is 19 hours long? Hollywood would embrace it. It doesn't matter what it is about, as long as 18 hours and 55 minutes of it is meaningless filler dialogue (with four minutes left over for commercials and 1 minute left for CGI created "action sequences").
No one likes kids in their movies and no one likes long movies either.
Wait, I just realized kids ruin movies even when they aren't in them. That's right, if you are stuck in the audience with them, you're screwed too. If they aren't wetting themselves, they're talking or playing Game Boys or blowing their noses or asking stupid obvious questions. But I guess I was like that when I was a kid too, expect I never got taken to movies in the first place (not because I asked stupid questions, but because it cost too much money apparently).
Talk about irresponsible parents. Last October, a mother brought their infant child to the movie Saw - a rated R movie based around serial killing, self mutilation, swearing, angry pigs, blood, bad acting, and gunshots. I guess the poor baby won't remember the movie, but I'm sure he was in hell when the movie was playing. What a dumb bitch to bring her kid to that. Oh well.
Dumb bitch.