Groundhog's Day - Not the movie, which I never saw, but the holiday. We are a society with automated, computer chipped, microtechnologic artificially intelligent robots with planes and computers and rockets and computer guided missiles and the internet - yet, we still believe in a silly tradition of Dark Ages. Some ass still pulls a gopher out of a hole in the middle of Buttfuck Pennsylvania and predicts the nation's weather for weeks to come. Even the knights of the roundtable knew this was a bunch of BS. They just used it as an excuse to have a festival and get wasted and hunt groundhogs. Why? Why does American Greetings still put this on their calendars as a holiday? It's stupid. No one gets presents. Nothing happens. No one even gets off of school or work. Stupid excuse for a holiday…it February really that boring? What about Valentine's Day? Jeez, diabetic monkeys could make up a better holiday in five minutes.
How about Black History Waffle Day? Everyone eats a bunch of waffles and syrup and listens to rap music.
Speaking of Coolio, how many World Series of Poker shows can you possibly show on TV? I mean, c'mon, enough is enough.
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