Davy smiled as she unlocked the door of her apartment, leading him in behind her. She flipped on the lights, revealing the setting of her many neon colored signs and groovy furniture.

”Wow, Kathy, you know I’ve never actually been up to a girl’s apartment this late at night before. We must be really hitting it off,” Davy marveled, examining the atmosphere of her home.

The girl stared back at him with an eyebrow raised and then chuckled, “Funny.” She removed her light jacket, tossing it aside on the couch, “Can I get you anything?”

”No, I’m fine.”

Kathy smiled and sauntered over to him, laying a finger on his chest, “You sure? I can’t get some wine or anything?”

”Wine? You must be joking, I don’t drink wine.” Davy backed himself out of the corner she pushed him in and kept his back to her.

“Oh, I see. You’re of those guys. I’ve got beer too.” Kathy started towards the kitchen.

“Well, actually. I’ll just take a glass of water.”

“Water? Davy, I thought you wanted to be romantic. Water isn’t romantic.”

”Gee, Kathy. I’m sorry. How about we just skip the drink?” Davy offered. She seemed very pleased with that suggestion and collapsed on the couch, laying her arm across the top. Davy took that as a yes and sat beside her. Before he knew what was happening, she advanced on him, placing her arms around his chest, laying soft kisses on his neck. He couldn’t help but suppress a giggle at the tickling sensation he felt and was soon beginning to laugh. She pulled back, “Something funny?”

”Sorry, I just…umm, I thought we could talk. Get to know each other a little more. I thought that’s why you invited me up here.”

”You don’t find me attractive?”

”Sure, I find you attractive. And I like kissing you, but that was a bit much, don’t you think?” Davy asked. Kathy stood up, staring angrily at him.

“Oh, so you’ll have sex with other girls, but you won’t have sex with me.”

“Whoa!” Davy hopped up from the couch, “Who said I was going to have sex with you?”

Kathy crossed her arms and chuckled knowingly, “It’s kind of assumed, Davy. You wine her, dine her, and then fuck her. Well, in this case, no wine involved.”

“I’ve never had sex in my life!” Davy shouted.

“You’re one for sarcastic humor, aren’t you?”

“I’m being serious. I was being serious about the wine too. I don’t drink, I don’t have sex. And I don’t have to take this.”

“So wait a minute, Davy. You date tons of girls, and you don’t have sex with any of them?” Kathy inquired. Davy nodded. “My God, what the hell do they see in you? I thought the reason you were so popular was because you were good in bed.”

”No, that’s ridiculous. I thought girls liked my charm and my good looks. They couldn’t possibly be attracted to…how good I am in bed because I haven’t been to bed with any of them.”

”Huh, well you might want to clear that up with all the girls down at the Vincent Van because they all think you’ve had sex before and are plenty experienced with it.”

“Why? Why do they all lie to each other and say they’ve had sex with me?”

“I don’t know. It’s been going on ever since you moved here.”

“I moved here two years ago!” Kathy merely shrugged at Davy’s outburst. “That’s it! I’m finding the source of all this and I’m putting it to a stop.”

“Good luck.” Kathy muttered, unenthused, taking a sip of wine.

“Oh, go to hell!” Davy shouted, slamming the door as he left.

“Really? She thought you just wanted to have sex?” Micky laughed at the idea as Davy relayed his story as they sat around a table at the Vincent Van Gogh Gogh the next day.

“I know. Apparently every girl that I’ve ever gone out with has said that we had sex. And I have no idea why. Do I look like that kind of guy?” Davy asked, holding his arms out for inspection.

“Well, you sure act like that kind of guy,” Mike commented.

“Mike,” Davy whined.

“No, I’m being serious. The way you’re always mooching in on some new chick. I bet they expect it,” Mike explained. “And then when they don’t get sex, they don’t want to be embarrassed because they couldn’t get laid by Mr. Easy himself.”

“Hey! That’s not true,” Davy protested.

”Wasn’t that the point of all this?” Peter said, “That it wasn’t true?”

Davy frowned and stood up on his chair, directing the attention of everyone in the club. The music stopped and everyone turned to stare at him.

“I would just like every girl here to know that I have never had sex before…with any of you,” Davy added to keep at least an ounce of dignity. “I don’t appreciate you all telling your girlfriends about the wonderful animal sex we apparently had when it didn’t happen. When I have sex, it’s with something I love.”

The room was silent until a voice from the back said, “But you said you loved me!”

This girl’s protest began shouts from all the other girls in the room, yelling that he said he loved them too. Davy chuckled nervously and got down from his chair.

“Let’s split,” Micky jerked his thumb to the door, Davy nodding agreeing. The four of them filed out, the yells of the girls still continuing.

“Man, that’s is the last time I tell a girl I love her when I really don’t. Causes a lot of problems. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to date a girl who lives here again!” Davy concluded.

“Excuse me,” Mike was tapped on the shoulder and a small, timid voice spoke. He turned, as did Micky, Davy and Peter. “I’m new in town and I was wondering if you could show me around.”

“New in town?” Davy muttered to himself. He stepped in front of Mike and flashed a charming smile, “’Ello, love!”