Love Menagerie: Chapter 20: That Midnight Street

Nick/Sarah

Sarah sighed as she stumbled down the stairs in the middle of the night, her hair tangled and in her eyes, blocking most of her vision. She had a pounding head ache which was blocking the other half, leaving her to grope along the wall to prevent herself from falling down the staircase. She and Nick had stayed up talking until nine, and when she wasn't talking she spent the time crying as she listened to him talk. After two hours he'd finally retreated to his room to let her get some sleep, and forty-five minutes later she'd awoken again, a sharp pounding behind her eyes.

Sarah groaned in frustration as she tried to get the Aleve bottle open, but it was childproof and she swore that most of the time kids could get into them easier than adults could. The pain in her head wasn't helping her focus and just when she thought she almost had it, her fingers slipped, the lid popped open, and tiny capsules sprayed everywhere, crashing against the wood floor and the countertops.

Sarah rubbed her temples as she heard Nick jogging down the stairs and into the kitchen. She looked up to see his disheveled form leaning against the counter closest to the door. His hair was sticking up in all different directions and it was obvious that he'd been sleeping, though apparently not very soundly if she'd managed to awaken him by spilling medicine on the ground.

"I'm fine," Sarah mumbled as she got down on her hands and knees and began to pick up the pills one-by-one.

Nick walked away and grabbed the broom from a nearby closet. He held it out to her, a light smirk on his mouth. "Here, you might want this."

Sarah looked up at him and after a moment she sighed. She willed her eyes to stop watering. She'd cried enough and she already had a head ache from it... she did not want to make it worse. She moved to lean her back against the counters and sat there on the floor, her eyes closed, her breathing deep.

Nick put the broom down and made his way to sit next to her. And there they sat for twenty minutes, their eyes staring straight ahead at the refrigerator across from them. Finally, Nick rolled his head over to look at her. She was staring still and it was then Nick noticed the stream of small tears silently rolling down her cheeks.

"Hey," Nick murmured and put his arms around her, pulling her body against his. "What's wrong, Sar? Don't cry. Do you have a head ache?"

Sarah nodded against him and sniffled, poorly attempting to keep her tears at bay. She was in love with a man who at one point in time had used her... and now he was the sweetest guy she knew... so which man was really Nick? She had no idea and the thought scared her to death. And, to top it all off, she had the worst migraine this side of the Mississippi.

"Let's go for a walk," Nick whispered, his mouth against her ear, his breath tickling her skin and causing the hair on the back of her neck to stand on end.

"Now?" Sarah looked up at him, before glancing down at her watch. "It's almost midnight, Nicky."

"So?" Nick smiled at the nickname. He'd always hated when people had called him Nicky. But it sounded so right coming from her lips. "We're young, Sar. It's only eleven. Live a little, babygirl."

Sarah's eyes closed at the name. Did he know what that did to her? Probably. She looked at him again and finally stood, grabbing two painkillers from the counter and swallowing them dry. She laughed lightly as Nick grimaced while he stood.

"How can you do that? You're gonna choke." He went to get her a glass of water but she stopped him.

"I'm fine," Sarah tugged on his arm. "Let's go."

They took their time walking the streets surrounding Brittany's and Derek's house and it wasn't until an hour or so later that they finally stopped just to stand there and stare up at the stars in the sky. It was beautiful outside, not too hot and not too cold. Perfect weather for a pair of jeans, a light sweatshirt, and someone there to hold you when the wind gently blew. And Nick did just that. Sarah couldn't help but smile every time his arms encircled her waist, pulling her closer to him. It was as though he couldn't get enough of her hugs and the thought made her want to cry... but for happier reasons, this time.

Sarah turned her face to watch him gazing up at the sky, the moon reflecting in his eyes and twinkling. It was a beautiful sight and a moment she wished she could freeze in time. She'd never had a moment that she wished she could relive over and over again, for the rest of her life... but tonight certainly was one of them.

"Nicky," Sarah finally whispered, her hand moving to the back of his head to get his attention and pull his face down closer to her own.

Nick looked down at her and his heart just about stopped at the look in her eyes. It had been a long time since it had been there... in the fact, the last time had been the morning they had awoken in that hotel room together, happy just being with each other.

"Morning, Sar," he mumbled as he snuggled up against her, his hair tickling her skin.

Sarah's eyes were wide. He was okay with this? What about his girlfriend? Didn't he care that he had just cheated on her for the second time in a couple of days?

"Nick," her fingers ran through his hair subconsciously as he tried to nestle further against her, finding warmth. "Nick, you get what this means, don't you?"

"That you're mine?"

Nick had never been happier just gazing into the eyes of a woman before. That night, Sarah's eyes held the future in them, just as they had that morning in the hotel room. Unfortunately, he'd taken her for granted before... but he couldn't do that this time... he wouldn't.

"Sarah?" Nick responded, hoping to prompt her. It was apparent she had wanted to say something, but had gotten just as caught up in the moment as he had once their eyes had met.

Sarah sighed and turned around in his arms, her fingers tangling in his hair. She pulled him closer to her and looked deep into his eyes again, wanting him to know and feel that everything she was about to say was coming from her heart and was being said with all honesty and sincerity.

"Nick," she started in a whisper, her voice getting stronger as she continued on, "I know that in the past I told you to leave me alone, that I never wanted to see you again. Yet, you were persistent and you wouldn't take no for an answer. And then tonight you came to me, and you told me that you were sorry for putting me through all this pain and that if I really wanted you to go away, you would. Do you have any idea how much that meant to me, Nicky? You were putting my feelings above your own, you were showing what real love really is. Putting the other person before you, letting them go if necessary. And I realized tonight, though I've slowly been figuring it out, how much I really do love you. I told myself I wasn't going to tell you... not tonight, not for a while, at least... but I just can't help it. I'm still trying to figure out exactly who you are. Are you this man who used me for sex when his girlfriend wasn't turning him on any longer? Or are you this man that seems to love me a whole helluva lot? Either way, I like what I'm seeing right now and I want you to know that I love you, Nick; I always have. I was really mad at you after what happened between us the first time around, but I was mostly hurt... because I was so in love with you. And I do realize that I played a huge role in our previous relationship, and I hadn't wanted to realize that before... I wanted to blame it all on you, but I can't do that anymore, Nick. And I can't keep going on, being a stubborn little b*tch. I love you and I want to be with you... if you want to be with me, too."

Nick took a deep breath and realized right then that for the first time in a long time he was crying openly in front of a woman. But Sarah had just told him everything he'd wanted to hear and more, all in one night, and to say that he was feeling a bit overwhelmed was the understatement of the year. Overwhelmed or not, he had some things he needed to tell her, too.

"Sarah... I just want to say that I am so sorry for everything that I put you through before. But you also have to know that in my heart I was never using you for sex. From the moment I met you, in my eyes there was something very special about you. After I met you in Derek's club, I couldn't get my mind off of you. It was crazy, because I'd be goin' along, doin' interviews and concerts and promos and award shows, or I'd be recording, or I'd even be on a date, and all of a sudden something would remind me of this beautiful girl that I'd spent one evening talking to in a club, who had the most beautiful eyes and an equally beautiful smile, and I would just stop dead in my tracks and wonder where you were. And then I saw you at that baseball game and I was so nervous to talk to you that night, Sar; you have no idea. But after the game the guys were all gettin' ready to leave and I knew that if I didn't go up and say hi to you, I'd always wonder what could've happened. So I went for it... and you have no idea how glad I am that I did. Sex with you wasn't sex at all, Sar... I made love every time that we were together. I'd never done that before, do you know that?"

Sarah looked up at him with tears in her eyes. This was the moment. The moment where everything changed for the two of them. They'd confessed and now it was time to set the ground rules and then act on their confessions.

"I'm scared, Nick," Sarah admitted, her eyes falling before slowly looking back up to his face again. "I'm trusting in you and that's taking a lot from me... I'm scared of being hurt again."

"I won't hurt you, Sarah," Nick pulled her tighter against him and reveled in her hug. How could he hurt such an angel? "I promise, baby, I promise."

"If you play me, I swear to God it's over... for good."

"I know... and I won't."

"Kiss me, Nick," Sarah whispered, nuzzling her face gently against his, as she swam in his eyes. "Just kiss me."

And so they kissed. At midnight. Under a solitary street lamp. And it was perfect.

Freddy/Brittany

Brittany groaned as she rolled over, trying to drown out the offensive noise. In Brittany's eyes, any form of ringing at eight in the morning was extremely obtrusive... especially when she'd spent the day before traveling for hours and hours. She was not in the mood to get up... and definitely not in the mood for something that was ringing at her. What in hell is that anyway? Groaning, she threw the covers off of her body and sat up, her eyes glaring as they looked around the room. And then she saw the green blinking light coming from inside of her purse and realized it was her cell phone.

Brittany stood from the bed and walked over to the dresser, pulling her phone from her purse. Looking at the caller ID she saw that the call was being placed from her house.

"Hello?"

"Brittany?" Sarah shrieked, sounding relieved. And then a moment later, she sounded pissed. "Where the hell are you?! Nick reminded me that you were supposed to be home yesterday! What the hell are you doing not calling to tell me that you're gonna be coming home late?! Especially when I call the airline and they tell me that you never even got on the plane! That your ticket had been canceled, actually! You couldn't take five minutes out of your precious time to tell me that you were staying in Venezuela longer?! I was scared sh*tless!"

Brittany tried to cut in countless times, before relenting and letting Sarah rant. It was good for the girl... maybe it would release some of her pent up frustrations. Lord knew the girl had plenty of 'em. Finally, after minutes, Sarah shut up.

"Gosh, Sar... take a breath, will ya, girl? It's too early in the morning to have a heart attack, but gosh, with the rate you're goin' you're gonna." Brittany sighed and ran her hands through her messy hair. She needed a shower and she knew it. "I'm fine, Sar. I'm really sorry I didn't call. To be honest, just like you forgot until now that I was supposed to be home, I forgot to call you to tell you that I'm actually gonna be staying in Seattle for a little while."

"What?" Sarah's eyes widened. "Seattle? Why?? Brittany, you didn't go and get hitched, did you? Gosh, tell me you didn't marry him."

Brittany laughed, "Gee, Sar, have a li'l faith in me-"

"Frankly, I don't! Running off and getting married in some little chapel without telling your family and friends is exactly something you would do!"

"Whatever," Brittany sighed. "Are you gonna let me explain myself? Or are you gonna make me sit through another verbal lashing?"

"Sorry."

"Right. Anyway... NO, I did not get married. It's just... well... Freddy flew off to Seattle yesterday morning and I was sitting there in the airport waiting for my flight and to tell you the truth I missed him. Terribly. And in one insane, yet wonderfully passionate, moment I made up my mind and canceled my flight to Tampa and made another one to Seattle."

"Wow..." Sarah breathed, her eyes darting around the room. It worried her that Brittany was playing all of her cards on Freddy... what if he couldn't come through in the clutch? It was possible. He had a skyrocketing career that kept him away from home much of the time and he was young and single. Famous, young, and single was not always a good combination. What if he let her down? Well... then Sarah would, of course, beat the living piss out of him. "So how long are you planning on staying there?"

"I'm not sure yet," Brittany spoke hesitantly. She was worried that Sarah would be mad at her for extending her "vacation" a while longer and not coming home. "Are you okay with me not there? I'm sorry, Sarah... I know I'm being selfish, it's just-"

"I'm fine, Brittany May," Sarah smiled gently at the childhood nickname. "Have fun, okay? You need this. Freddy treating you good?"

"Very. How're things with you and Nick?"

"Well..."

Brittany could hear the mischievousness in Sarah's tone. "Well...? That bad, huh?"

"No," Sarah smiled, her heart fluttering at the mere thought of the man lying next to her, staring at her and wondering what the two girls were talking about. "Very good, actually. But we'll talk when you get home."

"Oh, Sarah! That is so mean!"

"Yep," Sarah laughed wickedly. "Love you, sweets! Call me soon!"

Brittany groaned and decided not to even argue with her. Once Sarah made up her mind, there was no changing it. "Bye, babe." She sighed as they hung up. Looking around the room, her eyes settled on the door and she stood silently for a few moments, listening for any sound in the house.

Well, I'm up now, she thought, figuring she may as well get the day started.

Reaching into her suitcase that sat underneath her bed, Brittany pulled out her cell phone charger and plugged it into the nearest outlet, setting her phone on top of it. After stretching and yawning, she made her way into her bathroom and took a quick shower, throwing her hair up into a messy, wet pony tail on top of her head afterward.

Brittany made her way out of her bedroom and down the stairs in a pair of shorts, a T-shirt, and flip-flops. It was Seattle... but hey, it was summer... and, much to her delight, it was sunny outside. She stopped short when she saw Freddy standing in the kitchen, drinking apple juice from the carton, a pair of baggy shorts on and no shirt. Holy cow, she swore the room started spinning around her. She was so in love and the sight before her was not helping!

"Kill me now," Brittany murmured from the doorway, her heart practically palpitating within the confines of her chest.

Freddy whirled around, startled, and dropped the juice carton, spilling sticky liquid all over the floor. His eyes darted around the room, a boyishly innocent look crossing his face.

Real smooth, Freddy, he thought to himself, a light blush crossing his face when he noticed Brittany trying not to laugh. At least she was trying to be polite.

"Whoops...?" He grinned self-consciously when he realized he was shirtless. He had not expected her to be up so early. "Um... maybe I should go put some clothes on?"

Brittany laughed and shook her head, walking further into the kitchen and grabbing a dampened washcloth, tossing it to him. "You're fine... You should clean that up first."

"Oh, I see how it is... I get no help?" Freddy put on his puppy-dog face, but it just wasn't going to work today... and he could tell.

"Nope. You made the mess. And plus... I'm pregnant."

"Oh gosh," he groaned and kneeled down on the floor, cleaning up the mess. "Playing the pregnancy card already, huh?"

"Yeah, why not? Maybe then some good will come out of you getting me knocked up."

Freddy looked up, his eyebrows raised. He knew she was kidding, but couldn't help but ask anyway. "Isn't a baby good enough?"

Brittany's eyes widened and she blushed, looking away. "I was... kidding, Fred."

"I know," he smiled, before standing and walking over to the sink to rinse out the washcloth.

"Promise?" Brittany asked, her hands on his sides so he would look at her. She had to keep herself from shuddering as she touched his warm, bare skin.

Freddy laughed, but his eyes were serious, "I know you were kidding."

Brittany nodded and stepped away. "You pitching tonight?"

"No... I pitch in three days... but we have a game tonight."

Three days later they were getting ready to go to the game. Freddy had to be to the field early, of course, to warm up and get mentally ready, and Brittany decided to tag along and watch the warm-up from the seats. She stayed for the game, partly because of her love for baseball, and partly in support of Freddy. It was his first pitching start since he'd been injured and she knew he was nervous. Unfortunately, like many had feared, Freddy wasn't his normal self and didn't pitch very well and the Mariners lost 8-3. It was a depressing night and Brittany hadn't been sure how to act around him as they headed home later. All players acted differently after losses. Some got depressed, or pissed off, and didn't want to talk at all for the next couple of days... some shook it off and were their normal selves... and others needed a few moments of silence and then managed to snap out of it. Unfortunately, Derek had been the only player Brittany had ever gone home with after a losing game and she hadn't been exactly sure what to do with Freddy. The ride home had been sort of quiet but after they'd gotten home, he'd pulled her into a hug and kissed her forehead, telling her she didn't have to be afraid to talk to him... he was fine. A loss was a loss... life went on.

So weeks passed... much the same way... and before Brittany realized it, she'd been in Seattle for twenty-one days, had been to nine of the ten at-home games, had watched eight hours-worth of sitcoms on the nights when Freddy was away with the team, and had seen Freddy lose all four of his starts. Frankly, it was depressing and, yet, each time he lost he managed to put on a smile for her... and she knew sooner or later the facade that he was putting up for her would fade and he would lose it. She hoped it was sooner. In all actuality, his pretense scared her more than if he were to start screaming and trash a few rooms in his house.

Brittany was now fourteen weeks pregnant and her stomach had grown a little larger. She was self-conscious, but Freddy assured her every day that she was beautiful and made her smile by promising that when she was even bigger he'd tie her shoes for her. Every time she thought about the fact that she was already through her first trimester and two weeks into her second, she got petrified. Petrified of being huge and not being able to walk around, of being alone and not being able to get dressed, and most of all... labor. The thought of pushing a baby out of her... well, y'know... scared her half to death.

Brittany sighed as she looked at herself in the mirror. She was getting ready to go to another Mariners game and Freddy was pitching. Though neither were admitting it, they were both nervous. Tonight was the night. Lou Piniella, Mariners manager, had said in a recent interview that if Freddy didn't produce a win tonight he would give serious thought to taking Freddy off of the starting roster and moving him into the bullpen until he got his pitches back. Brittany and Freddy had both read the article in that morning's paper, but neither had commented on it... both too scared of jinxing him. Baseball was a superstitious sport.

They made their way to Safeco Field, talking small-talk as a Salsa CD played in the background. Brittany knew that if she weren't there he'd be blaring it. Salsa music was what he always listened to before games, just like pasta was his comfort food. And, out of superstition, Brittany turned the volume up and didn't talk with him again. Freddy got what she meant. Maybe he needed to go back to his old routine. Drive to the game in silence, listen to music on the way, sit on the couch in the clubhouse and listen to more music, take a shower and get suited up, go out to the field and warm up, and play ball. Brittany had never been in the routine before and he knew that she was starting to feel that she just wasn't his lucky charm. The fact that she would think that made him want to throw up, but he didn't say anything. They stayed silent.

"Freddy," Brittany sighed as she walked up to him in the clubhouse after the game. She threw her arms around his neck and pulled him into a tight hug. He needed one. "I'm so sorry, baby."

Freddy nodded against her, burying his nose in her hair, loving how it smelled like his shampoo. He'd lost, of course. And for the first time in a long time he felt like crying. Seriously crying. Not a tear here or there... but crying. He knew what Piniella would decide. He knew that at least for a little while, he was off to the bullpen... and the thought sickened him. Freddy was a starter... not a reliever, not a closer... a starter, dammit. Why couldn't he pitch the damn ball anymore?!

Brittany looked up at him, her own eyes watering. "Pasta?"

"Really??" Freddy looked down at her with a boyish excitement that didn't reach his eyes. I will not cry, I will not cry, I will not cry...

"Yeah, sweetie. Let's go."

They went to an Italian restaurant and ate dinner in relative silence that night. They chewed quietly, watching each other as both of their hearts ached. They simply thought... thought... and thought. And later that night, after getting back home, for reasons unknown to both of them, Brittany let him make love to her for the first time since their first time.

*Alive; Jennifer Lopez