An hour later, Brian, Kevin, AJ, and Howie sat around the waiting room with Nick’s family. Jane had called Brian’s house from the hospital to tell them the good news, and they had gotten there right away. But they had not yet been in to visit Nick because Dr. Madden was running tests on him. So now they waiting impatiently, eager to see their young friend finally awake.

Just then, the door opened, and in stepped Dr. Madden. “Mr. and Mrs. Carter?” he asked. “Could I talk to you two in private, please?”

“Sure,” Bob replied, exchanging an uncertain glance with his wife, as they both stood and followed Dr. Madden out of the room.

Dr. Madden led them down the hall and stopped right outside the door of Nick’s room. “Okay, as you know, I’ve just run a whole battery of tests on Nick. Right now, the results aren’t that conclusive because Nick has just woken up and hasn’t had much time for recovery. I’ll run some more tests in a few days to see if he has improved any, and we’ll know more at that point.”

“What are these tests all for?” Jane asked worriedly.

“To measure the amount of damage done to his nervous system,” Dr. Madden replied.

“And?”

Dr. Madden took a deep breath, saying, “I don’t want to alarm you, but right now, Nick’s showing signs of brain damage.”

Jane and Bob both gasped, immediately clutching each other’s hands for support.

“How bad is it?” Bob asked.

“That’s what we’re not sure of yet. From what it looks like, by the way he hit his head on the steering wheel, all three major parts of his brain were affected. The cerebrum, which controls intelligence, emotion, memory, speech, and many other aspects, and the cerebellum, which controls movement and balance, were the most affected. The brain stem, which controls vital functions such as heartbeat and breathing, was only slightly affected. This is why Nick is unable to breathe on his own right now,” Dr. Madden explained.

“Will that get better?” Jane asked worriedly.

“Yes, the breathing will. He’s already doing better than before, but he’s still not breathing well enough to be taken off the respirator. It could take a few more days.”

“What about the other things you mentioned?” Bob pressed.

Dr. Madden sighed. This was the question he had been dreading the most. “Like I said before, it’s too hard to determine at this point. Sometimes, patients with brain injuries such as Nick’s recover and regain normal lives. With some other patients, unfortunately, the injuries end up permanent.”

“Meaning?”

“Meaning they suffer from permanent brain damage. Some can live relatively normally, while others require round the clock care at special nursing facilities.”

Dr. Madden’s words were harsh, but that was the reality of Nick’s situation. Bob and Jane knew that it was a possibility Nick could end up like some of those people he had mentioned, brain damaged for life. Of course, the joy and relief they felt at having Nick awake was powerful. Yet, at the same time, knowing that their son might never be the same again left them sad, depressed, and more than anything, terrified.

Sunday afternoon, Marissa sat on her bed, absently flipping through the latest issue of Seventeen. It was so weird – just weeks earlier, Marissa had loved reading these teen magazines, getting the latest fashion trends and the scoop on the hottest celebrities around. Now it just seemed petty and pointless.

Her attention turned to the TV that was turned on in her room, as an MTV News brief came on. Lately, MTV news was the one thing that interested her. She watched it, desperate to hear some good news on Nick. But ever since she had heard the first news report on the accident, she hadn’t heard any updates on Nick’s condition. Not good ones, at least.

“This is Brian McFayden with an MTV News brief. Sources informed us early today that Backstreet Boy Nick Carter, who had been in a coma at an Atlanta, Georgia hospital since the fatal car accident he was involved in on the night of January 27, finally awoke yesterday. As of now, Nick’s actual condition is unknown. We’re waiting for comments from the Backstreet Management. That’s the news for now…”

Marissa let out a shuddering breath. Her relief was over-bearing. She knew that Nick was probably still in a serious condition, but at least he was awake.

She was already dealing with the death of one of her good friends, but knowing that she had helped kill a famous celebrity such as Nick Carter would be enough to send hew overboard.

“Dr. Madden?”

Dr. Madden looked up from his desk to see a young man standing in the doorway of his office. It was one of Nick Carter’s friends. Brian.

“Yes,” he said, smiling politely at Brian. “Come in.”

Brian hesitantly stepped into the office. “I’m sorry to bother you, but I just wanted to talk to you in private,” he said apolitically.

“No problem. Sit down,” the doctor replied, motioning to one of the two chairs in front of his desk.

Brian sat down in one. He was silent for a moment, as he collected his thoughts. Then he spoke, saying bluntly, “He’s not getting better, is he?”

Dr. Madden sighed. He steepled his fingers together and leaned forward in his chair. “Well… his condition is progressing much more slowly than I had hoped, but I can’t tell you he’s not getting better. He is. It’s just… slow going,” he finished uneasily.

“But do you think he will get better? Fully, I mean?” Brian pressed.

The doctor shifted uncomfortably in his seat. He knew Brian was expecting his full honesty, no matter how hard it would be. “All right, I’ll be honest with you,” Dr. Madden started hesitantly. “As far as his physical condition is going, his breathing is much better. I haven’t told his parents yet, but I’ll probably be taking him off the respirator this afternoon. I think that as long as he’s still on oxygen, he’ll be okay. And as for movement of his body…” the doctor trailed off.

“How bad is it?” Brian asked, his blue eyes boring into Dr. Madden’s troubled brown ones.

“I’m not sure that Nick will ever regain full usage of his arms and legs again,” the doctor finished softly.

Brian gasped. “So… he’ll be paralyzed? For the rest of his life?”

“I’m not promising it. But at this point, it looks likely.”

Brian nodded, refusing to let his pent-up tears rise. “Wh-what about his…mental condition?”

Dr. Madden sighed again. This was the hardest part of being a doctor – having to give families and friends of patients bad news. “Brian, it doesn’t look good. I don’t think his parents realize it or accept it yet, but Nick’s never going to be… the same. He’s going to have to learn to read and write, and even speak all over again, if that will even be possible…”

Brian’s chin trembled as he stared at the doctor in shock. “He’ll be like an infant…” he murmured, his voice trailing off.

Dr. Madden nodded. “Once he is well enough to be discharged from the hospital, he’s going to require full-time care, at least for awhile.”

“For how long?” Brian asked.

Dr. Madden shrugged. “That depends on whether or not he recovers enough to be on his own. Many disabled people can be on their own and live fairly normal lives. But others have disabilities that are so severe, they need to be tended to around the clock for the rest of their lives.”

“And that could happen to Nick?” Brian gasped.

“In all honesty… yes,” Dr. Madden replied sadly.

Brian nodded, struggling with all his might to contain his emotion. “Thank you,” he mumbled. “I have to go.”

Dr. Madden nodded. “I’m sorry,” he whispered, as Brian walked out. “So sorry.”

“Hey, buddy,” Brian whispered, a few minutes later. He sat next to Nick’s bed, holding his friend’s hand, as he had done so many times before. Nick’s eyes were open, as they usually were nowadays, but they stared straight ahead with that blank look in them. Brian gave Nick’s hand a squeeze.

What had happened to his best friend? What had happened to the Nick he knew? It seemed as if the body in the bed was not really Nick, but just his shell. He was awake, alive, but he was not really there. His body was, but where was his soul?

Brian gazed deep into those blue eyes, as if the real Nick was hiding somewhere behind them. The eyes blinked, but Brian figured that was just a reflex, not a sign that Nick knew Brian was there with him. If he did know it, he sure wasn’t showing it.

“Don’t worry, Nick,” Brian said softly. “Dr. Madden said he’s going to take you off the respirator later today, so at least you won’t have that stupid tube crammed in your throat. That must suck.”

Brian cleared his own throat, continuing, “And if he’s right about you needing full time care, don’t you worry. We won’t ship you off to some nursing home. You’ll have all of us around to help you out. Your dad and mom, BJ, Leslie, Angel, Aaron, Kev, Howie…” He listed all their names, wondering if those names had any meaning to Nick anymore. “We’ll all take care of you, Frack.”

“Brian?”

Brian whirled around, startled at hearing his name. He saw Jane standing in the room behind him.

“Oh, hi, Jane,” he said, offering a slight smile and rubbing quickly at his eyes. He wasn’t sure why; it wasn’t as if she hadn’t seen him cry before.

“What did you mean by ‘shipping him off to some nursing home’?” Jane asked, her eyes narrowed.

Brian played with his hands nervously. “Well… maybe you should talk to Dr. Madden about that…” he said softly.

“Did he tell you something, Brian?” she demanded.

“Well… yeah. I talked to him this morning,” Brian confessed.

“And he said Nicky would need to go to a nursing home?” Jane cried, her eyes wide.

“No, no. Not for sure, at least. He said it was a possibility that Nick would need full-time care for awhile,” Brian said, stressing the word possibility.

Jane gasped. “Oh my God,” she whispered. “It’s that bad?”

Brian sighed. “Jane, he said that Nick will be like an infant. He’ll need to be cared for 24/7. Eventually, he’ll have to learn to talk all over again. He might walk again…”

Jane had begun to cry softly, so Brian stopped. “I… I couldn’t deal with that,” she sobbed. “I could never give him that care.”

Brian raised an eyebrow, rather shocked at what she said. He had thought that as Nick’s mother, Jane would do whatever she could for her son. “Aw, you don’t mean that, Jane,” he reasoned. “We just have to keep telling ourselves that Nick’s alive. And that’s the most important thing.”

“But is it?” Jane fired back, her eyes filling with fresh tears. “What is a life worth if it’s spent being taken care of like an invalid?”

Brian’s mouth dropped open. “Well, I’d much rather take care of Nick for the rest of my life than have him dead,” he said.

“I can’t do that though!” she cried. “I have my own life. We all do. The kids are so busy. Bob and I are so busy. We would never be able to take on that kind of responsibility.”

“So what would you do? Would you ship him off to a nursing home?” Brian asked, aghast.

“If that’s what’s best,” Jane replied coolly.

Brian shook his head. “I don’t think that’s what’s best for him,” he argued. “I think he needs to be with someone who loves him, someone who truly cares about him, not just for him.”

“Then you take him,” Jane snapped.

“You mean that?” Brian asked.

“Yes, I mean it. I told you, we can’t take him home with us and give him that kind of attention. If you want to do it, fine.”

“All right, fine,” Brian agreed, glaring at her. With that, he jerked past her and out the door.

Hopefully, that would never happen. Hopefully, in a few more weeks, the turmoil in her life would pass, and she could go on living.