I drifted aimlessly to my car, slowly pulling the door open to crawl inside. The key never made it into the ignition, the door never fully closed behind me, my bag rested on the street near the tire, my heart left squashed on the front steps of her apartment. Why did she do this to me..every time. She knew exactly how to crawl her way into my soul..latch on, then leave me hanging.

I’m not sure how long I sat there...the rain pounded down to the ground, soaking my clothes, the interior of my car, but none of that mattered. Flashes of lightening streaked through the darkened sky, illuminating the wetness that streaked down my cheeks. I bent down to grab my bag, missing it by inches, only to try again, getting a hold of the strap and hoisting it up. I finally got my car started, and as the wipers brushed away the rain, I pulled from her parking lot for the last time..leaving it behind...like I would her.

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My house was dark and lonely...but it felt like the perfect setting..for it matched my mood. Never switching on a light, I felt my way up the stairs to my bedroom. My large bed standing empty, the blankets pulled up to the top...just the way she always liked them. Feeling the anger slowly rise in my throat, I raced towards the soft mattress, ripping the covers off the bed, flinging them to the floor in a large pile, my body following close behind. Tears came again, but I hastily brushed them away, forcing myself to stand. My mind raced back to the one person I needed tonight...the one person I knew I would need..but left behind anyway. Why did I have to move to L.A...why did I have to pack up and leave my home for a girl who I knew keep down wouldn’t want me. If only I could find my phone....my phone would bring me closer to her..even if it was just her voice. My phone...where was my phone?

Phone....I heard it ringing...heard its loud shrill through the mounds of sheets that stretched across the floor. I made a dive for it...throwing back objects that kept me from my phone. Damn..where was that phone..... It stopped...no more sound....I kept looking, trying desperately to reach the person on the other end. I needed her...and she was trying to reach me....the phone.

My hand grazed past a smooth object, my fingers clutching around it, freeing it from its cloth prison. The number that flashed on its screen, proved my assumption right....she was calling me...knowing that I needed her. Pressing the redial button, I waited for her voice to fill my head, and my heart, patching up the missing pieces.

“Hello?” Her sweet voice touched my soul, giving me some hope again....for I knew that even though she was far away..she still loved me.

“It’s me.” My answer simple..for she needed no more.

“I was hoping you’d call. Are you okay?” Her worry for me....surfacing with every breath she took.

“No I’m not....it finally happened.” I didn’t feel like discussing the details, but knew I wouldn’t be able to hang up if I didn’t.

“That bitch.....” She got quiet, her breathing raspy and unsteady. “I’m sorry, but she just didn’t understand the gift you had given her. She never held your heart gingerly, she never thought about your feelings, and she never cared about what you thought. Come home.”

“I wish I could...I just can’t pick up and leave yet.” I pulled the crumpled up sheets around my head, trying to bury her voice deeper into my brain.

“Fine..then I’m coming out there. I’m not going to let you go through this alone.” Her voice grew forceful, and I knew that even if I tried to argue with her, it would do me no good.

“Faith..I can’t have you fly all the way out here tonight...I’m really okay.” The phone was pressed tightly against my ear, allowing me to be as close to her as I could.

“JC...don’t argue with me...you know it won’t work.” I could picture her smile from where I sat....smiling myself for I knew I’d be seeing her in a few short hours. “You get some rest, and I’ll be there as soon as I can get a flight. Good night.”

“Good night Suga....promise me something though before you go?” My voice growing a bit louder, for I wanted her to stay with me just a little longer.

“What’s that?” Her soft voice made me feel better all over again.

“You won’t go over and kill her when you come?” I smiled at that, for I knew her all too well.

“Now that’s an awful lot to ask, but for you..I think I can handle it.” She giggled lightly, causing some of my pain to loosen up.

“Thank you.” I pressed the button on the phone, shutting it off..losing the comfort of her voice. She would be here soon, and as long as I kept telling myself that...I would be okay.

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*Hours Later*
She crept quietly through his door, setting her suitcase down by his bed. Her eyes roamed over his perfect features, taking in every detail. His ears and the way they poked out just a little. His nose...she loved his nose. The way his eye lids twitched when he had a dream, and his hair that poked every which way across the pillow. She hated to wake him, so she slipped into the bathroom to change into her pj’s. Inching the covers back, she slipped between the sheets..pulling them up to her chin, turning so her eyes could focus in on him again.

This was the man she had loved for so long, the same man that always ran to her whenever he needed a hug, a comforting word, or just a simple smile of praise. She would do anything for him, flying across America came into that category. She hated that girl for destroying him, for ripping out his heart, for crushing his soul, and for making him stop smiling. She knew it had been a mistake from the beginning..him moving here for her. She had tried to warn him, but he had been his typical stubborn self..telling her that he knew what he was doing.

I stirred, her eyes never leaving me..but I knew she was there..I had known all along. I blinked a few times, allowing her to come into focus.

“You came.” My hand taking hers, gently running my thumb across the back of it.

“Of course...I told you if you ever needed me..I’d be here.” Her eyes showed so much emotion, and I knew that it was all directed at me.

“I’ve got something to confess.” My voice grew quiet, my eyes lowered for I would have a hard time telling her this.

“JC, you can tell me anything.” Her hand tightened around mine, giving me the bit of strength I needed.

“I ran away....” I stopped, knowing that this in a way would possibly hurt her. “From you.”

Her hand never left mine, her eyes filled with tears, her voice grew deeper..filled with intensities. “You came all the way here, because you were running from me...why?”

“I love you..and I was scared to let you know that.” My gaze fell upon her again....her beauty shining brightly in my dark bedroom.

“JC.....” Tears begin to fall down her cheeks, but I carefully whisked them away.

“Please..just let me finish. I didn’t want to loose your friendship, for I cherished that more then anything else in my life...so I ran...I knew that I would still be your friend, but that being far away, I could keep my deeper feelings at bay. Dating her was just another way of keeping it down. Faith, the only one I ever wanted was you.” I stopped, letting my words sink in...what she did next surprised me.

Her hands came up out of the covers, taking my face between them, and pulling me down so that my lips crashed against hers. Her fingers dug into my hair, trying to bring me closer. I wrapped my arms around her, crushing our bodies together. This is what I had always pictured our first night together being like..I just had to get up the guts to tell her how I felt. Through the entangled arms, I managed to reach for my stereo remote, hitting the play button..allowing her favorite song to echo through our minds.

JC Chasez