THE GANGSTER SAGA
* * * * *
JC had a funny feeling, and when he looked behind him, and saw Muscles, standing there with a rolled up newspaper, looking ominous and forbidding, he yanked the newspaper away, and spat, "GIVE me that! You trying to scare him away, or something?"
Babyface now teased mercilessly. He would come almost up to Timberlake, and then yipe, and jump back. But he did the same thing to JC. It ocurred to JC that if anyone passing by had stopped to look in the large picture window, he could only conclude that he was viewing a mad house. One by one, the others drifted around, and were behind the two competitors. Jimmy, Mama Weasel and LanTed stood behind JC, and added their entreaties to his. Mario and Vincenzo stood behind Mad Dog, and coaxed Chris to come to him.
"Ahhh, come-on-a, you little prick. Come-a to you real master, eh?" Mario sneered. "He's a got what you need..." Vincenzo merely glared.
JC was sweating, and was just about at the point where he was about to give up, when he found himself saying, in between "calls".... "Come on, puppy, come on-- Okay! I was an idiot! I'm sorry! Here boy, here ya go, come on-- Whatever you want, Babyface, stay with me or don't, but I'll always want you, and I'll always be good to you. Here, boy, here boy!"
Mad Dog continued, oblivious of any undercurrents, and tirelessly repeated himself as if he were a recording.
Babyface suddenly stopped with the teasing, and tilted his head, and listened to JC.
"Come on, boy, come on--- Babyface, we have a chance to be happy, can't you forgive me, can't you--?"
The rest of his calling was cut off, by Babyface throwing himself on JC, and knocking him down in his exuberance. Twinkletoes gasped in shock, and grabbing onto Chris, rolled over, and pulled the both of them to their feet. "See?" he shouted to Mad Dog. "He came! He came to me, he's mine, see?"
Mad Dog stood there stunned. It had never occurred to him that his puppy wouldn't come to him. His eyes filled with tears, and his lips trembled.
"Ohhhh, look at that," LanTed said, his tender heart momentarily taking over for his brain. "He's heartbroken...."
"Nah, he's HEADbroken," Muscles muttered, as he knocked the gun from Mad Dog's nerveless fingers, and kicked it over to JC, who smoothly snatched it up. Mad Dog actually sat down on the floor, lifted up his voice, and wept aloud.
"If he starts howling, out he goes," Jimmy warned. "I can't take no howling."
"What-a you gonna do with him?" Mama worried, wringing her hands. "I'm-a not housetraining that."
Muscles grabbed Mad Dog by the scruff of the neck, and hauled him up. "Boss? You want I should TAKE CARE of him?"
JC, with his arm still around Babyface, took a step or two closer. "YES, Muscles. I want you should TAKE CARE of him."
Muscles locked eyes with Twinkletoes. "Take CARE of him?"
Twinkletoes locked eyes with Muscles. "Take care of him."
"Cause I mean, I just want to know---"
"KILL the frickin' bastard, Muscles! How plain do I have to make it!?"
"Sheeze, boss. You don't have to have a spasm about it. Plain English will do. Okay, come on, you..." and Muscles gave Mad Dog the bum's rush. After watching through the window, and satisfying himself that Fatone had the situation well in hand, that is, Mad Dog was comfortably ensconced in the spacious trunk of the luxury sedan, JC sighed gustily, and turned to Babyface. The intensity of their gaze soon caused the others in the room to back off, and return to their usual places.
JC vaguely wondered when he heard Jimmy fussing at his mother, "Just don't think I'm ever gonna call that little yellow-headed thing "Pops." Cause it ain't gonna happen."
"Lannie's a good boy, you treat him with respect, Jimmy..." Their arguing faded away, as they disappeared into the kitchen out back.
"Don't ask," Babyface advised.
"Come 'ere, you," Twinkletoes commanded. "What's with the hard time you were givin' me?" and he led Babyface over to the same little couch by the fire- place they'd shared one night--a night that felt a lifetime ago.
"What's with the hard time you were giving me?" Babyface countered, as he pulled his legs up, and sat Indian-style. "Did ya ever think a guy might want a little reassurance or something?" He put his hand down, and traced his finger shyly on the material. He seemed to find this absorbing, because he wouldn't meet JC's eye for anything. "Sometimes a person just needs to hear things. A person can't assume---get in trouble that way..." soon his muttering was so low it was unintelligible.
"Okay. You need to hear things? Okay, maybe I need to hear things, too." JC nodded. "You first."
"Chicken," Babyface accused.
"I ain't no---" JC sputtered, before sinking into defeat. "All right, maybe I am a little chicken. But here goes. Babyface, I--I--" he stared at Chris so long, he seemed to lose his train of thought. "I almost wish we could just go upstairs, I think I could show you what I mean, better than I could say it."
"I know that would be easier for you," Babyface said seriously. "But for once, I'm gonna insist on what *I* need. JC, I want you to tell me what you're thinking. Tell me what you expect from me. I need to know this stuff."
"I'm thinking...I've never felt my heart leave my body before, and ride around in someone's back pocket. I'm thinking that I could just sit and stare at you, and not count it wasted time. I'm thinking, how can he be so beautiful and so horribly annoying all at the same time? I'm thinking the smartest thing for me to do is to get up right now, and walk out of here, and never see you again, because-- because this is just *crazy* I can't afford to get tangled up like this, because you are out of your ever-loving mind, and you'll only make me as crazy as you are--"
Chris' fingers shushed his lips. "You're getting hysterical. Breathe."
"And as for what I expect out of you? What I expect? I never expect anything out of you--I CAN'T expect anything, because you're completely unpredictable, and did I mention "out of your ever-loving mind"? because you are-- "Can't I just say what I hope for, Babyface? "Cause what I hope for is just to wake up with you in the mornings. That's all. I just want to see you there on the other side of the bed. If I have that, I have everything I want."
After a long moment, Chris nodded. "I can probably manage that."
JC ventured, "Don't you have something to say to me? I kind of hope you do, because you're not the easiest person to read sometimes. I mean, sometimes you're like glass, so transparent it's funny, I mean, literally FUNNY as hell... But, um, sometimes you're kind of inscrutable. Ya know?"
"It's my exotic eyes. Makes me inscrutable," Chris smiled. "But yeah, I guess there's something I ought to say, too." He took a deep breath, and coughed, partly just to buy time. Then, he steadied his voice, and said, "I haven't felt important to anyone in a long time. Of course, I'm important to the girls, I don't mean that, but---just me. For what I am, not what I can do? Not since Katie died, I haven't felt like --I mattered at all. And you scared the hell out of me for awhile there, because I forgot how good that felt, and you made me remember it, and--" his voice lowered suspiciously, and skated around tears, "I couldn't afford to remember it, because it felt so good, so horribly good, and it made what I was doing look it's true colors, nasty and unbearable, and I was afraid I could never go back to it, once I'd been loved again..." his head hung, and then the sobs overtook him, and then JC overtook the sobs, as he pulled Chris into his arms, and they collapsed into the arms of the couch together.
"If you ever go back to it, you'll take me with you," JC tried to joke. "I'll be your partner, we'll take turns blowing the johns. Because there's no way you're leaving me. We're a two-for-one deal now." JC lifted Chris' chin, and waited until he could focus, and look him in the eye. "I've never said these words to anybody before, but I'm saying them to you. I. Love. You. Do you hear me?" and he sealed the word with a kiss.
"Uh-huh," Chris answered shakily. "I hear you." He repeated, with quiet wonder, "I hear you. But say it again."
"I love you."
"Again."
"I love you."
"Again?"
"I hope you don't think I'm gonna get tired of saying it, cause I'm not." And JC pulled him into a deep kiss, and they were like two lazy cats on the couch, boneless and melted into each other, and getting impossibly closer, and JC almost didn't hear it, half-smothered as it was with his own lips, but then it was repeated, and this time JC heard it.
"I love you too." And JC smiled.
