Meet Sheila. She's your average *NSYNC fan, and if you couldn't tell, her favorite *NSYNC song is "Bye Bye Bye."
:::One day, Sheila hops on her horse and rides over to Chris's house:::
Sheila: Hey Chris, I'm here to help with the funnel cake!!
:::Sheila peeks her head through Chris's front door and looks around:::
Sheila: Chris??? CHRIS I'M HERE AND IF YOU DON'T GET OUT HERE RIGHT NOW I'M GONNA LEAVE, 'CAUSE I HAVE OTHER PEOPLE TO GO HELP OUT!!!!!!!!
:::Chris pops out from behind a chair and pulls Sheila in onto the floor after looking outside at some nearby trees suspiciously:::
Chris: Shhh...they want your body.
Sheila: Chris aren't you seeing someone for that?
Chris: Nah, I quit goin...but it's all good. I've got my tree fighting equipment out back.
Sheila: So how about that funnel cake...do you have all the ingredients?
Chris: All excpet the powdered sugar...they came last night and took it.
Sheila: I bet I could find some, don't worry about it. You go get started making the batter and I'll double check your cupboards for the sugar!
:::Chris heads into the kitchen and pulls out his Amish 'Just add water' Funnel batter. After adding the water and stirring it around he turns on the stove with the pan allready in place. Meanwhile Sheila is digging through Chris's food and finds a bright orange bag reading 'whitey':::
Sheila: Hey I found the powered sugar!
Chris: Awesome I just pulled out the funnel!
Sheila: How'd you make that so quick? Did you follow the instructions Chris?
Chris: Yeah...boy the Amish know how to do it!
:::Shiela sprinkles the powdered sugar on the funnel cake and tilts her head oddly as it fizzels::: Chris: Sheila, wherever did you find that crazy ass powered sugar?
Sheila: In the cupboard behind Bobbee's old homemade cooki... Wow I need to get runnin'! I'll see ya at Joey's surprise deal though!
:::Dashing out the door, Sheila hops onto her horse and gallops down the street to Lance's house. After dismounting Sheila walks to Lance's door, but before she can knock, it swings open and she finds Lance in a panic wearing only his pink apron:::
Lance: We don't have enough time for the lacy quartets of flowers!!!
Sheila: Yes we do, I made them ahead of time!!
:::Lance looks at Sheila skeptically as she pulls out a tupperwear with goopy blotches of flowers:::
Lance: I've got it!! We'll just use strawberries instead!
Sheila: Didn't you need my help Lance?
Lance: No baby, not really, it's allready done!
One bottom chocolate cream cake layered with chocolate mousse and decorated with strawberry and chocolate mouse. You spent so much time with Christopher that you completely forgot about James Lansten! But it's all good hunny!
:::Justin walks in:::
Justin: Yo Lance, sumpin' be smellin' good up in heaaa, knowhatimsayin?
Lance: Ahhheeeeeee, get out...get out of the kitchen!!!
Justin: Word, you be bakin' fo mah sexy ass?? Awww, Lance you be too damn much sometimes!
Sheila: Justin! Come quick! Someone's touching your Benz!!! *Gasp* Without Mittens!!
Justin: Mah baby??? Dayyuumm...Lance ah be back yo!
:::Meanwhile Back at Chris' Joey stummbles upon the funnel cake:::
Joey: Damn, this is funnel madness! Check that sexy funnel tunnel...growl baby!
JC: Hey Joey, what's that?
Joey: A funnel cake for my birthday! Sheila and Chris made it!
JC: What'd they use for the topping? I used the rest of the powdered sugar to cut my stash last night.
Joey: I dunno...it looks fizzly. Mmmmm...I bet that's good fizzel...
JC: Me too. Hey, lemme see that funnel...damn, look at that funnel tunnaahhhhh!!!!!
:::Chris runs in crying:::
Chris: Don't look!! Ahhhhhhh!!
JC: Who used my stash as powered sugar!?!?!?!?
Chris: SHEILA!
:::While Chris and JC are arguing about the crack, Joey turns and eats the entire thing:::
Chris: Ahhh! That was Gramma's funnel!!! She's gonna be ticked!
:::Chris pictures Gramma pulling up on her Harley, angry as all hell:::
Chris: Ahhh! JOEY, that funnel cake was for Gramma!
JC: Sure was the best funnel tunneling I've ever seen...
Joey: But it's my birthday!
::: Justin pulls up in his benz and has a strange man help him carry in a huge draped opject:::
Justin: Check me out yo. I be phat!
:::Pulling down the drapes, the contents of the kitchen ooh and ahh at the entirely budda statue of Justin himself in ghetto gear:::
Justin: Happy birthday Joey!
Joey: I don't want that shit!
Chris: I want some toast yo, can I borrow a finger?
JC: Can I hide my stash in your head Justin?
Justin: Hellz naw! Yo, where be Lance? His ass iz sposed to be here...must be runnin' late wit Olivia, his dayum sexy girlfriend from Detroit, who runs dat phattie website wit Nina called Everybodys Free! (https://www.angelfire.com/mn/nsynchumor)
:::Sheila pulls up and sprints inside, out of breath:::
Sheila: Sorry I'm late. I got detoured going to get Joey a present. Lance should be here soon. He got delayed with Olivia, his damn sexy girlfriend from Detroit, who runs that phattie website with Nina called Everybodys Free! (https://www.angelfire.com/mn/nsynchumor)
Justin: Told ya'll!
Chris: I'm sooo sorry JC!!!
JC: Blow me punk, you're payin me back!!
Joey: Can I have crack too?
:::Lance pulls up, lookin' spunky:::
Lance: JOEY! I MADE YOU A CAKE DON'T START THE CELEBRATION OF YOUR BIRTH WITHOUT ME!! God, Olivia gives good hea...um, oh...sorry I got carried away. *cough*
Justin: Dayum, Lance been gettin' some mad action, knowwhatimsayin!
:::Joey eats the cake, while JC, Chris and Justin qeustion Lance about hittin' it wit Olivia. "Did you do it on the kitchen counter or on the floor?":::
:::Sheila shoots up in bed and looks around:::
Sheila: Whoa...what a crunkin' dream!
:::After getting up and showering, she plops in front of the computer and logs onto her favorite site ever, Everybodys Free! (https://www.angelfire.com/mn/nsynchumor):::
Sheila: Whoa, updates...sweet!
:::Sheila's mouth drops open as she sees her entire day taped by Stever. She screams when all of a sudden her entire ass is broadcast all around the world:::
Sheila: Ahhhh!!! Whoa...how'd Nina get in that position with JC and Justin at the same time? Dayum mad skillz, yo.
Everybodys Free [to make fun of nsync]
https://www.angelfire.com/mn/nsynchumor
Written and produced by Nina and Olivia for Everybodys Free
© 2001 James Lance Bass Mississippi Productions
