JC: Damnit Lance, I thought I told the guys to be here at 4! We need to get these songs done, how else are we gonna get this record done in time?
Lance: Geeze JC, don't worry. Everything will be fine, I just wonder what the other guys are doing...
JC: Umm maybe they're sleeping...duh, come on Lance, use what little of a brain you have!
Lance: Watch it, I'm from m-i-crooked letter-crooked letter...
::interrupted by JC::
JC: i-crooked letter-crooked letter, yeah yeah we know! So shutup, I'm gonna go call Jero...my mom. Come get me when they show up. ::JC starts walking out of the studio::
Lance: Ok, I'll just sit here and wait for the other guys... ::under his breath:: while you go shoot up... JC: ::quickly turning around:: Excuse me? I TOLD YOU I WAS GONNA CALL MRS. SHHHZAY.
Lance: What are you talking about, I didn't say anything...
::JC leaves::
::Lance sits in a rocking chair in the dark, while he starts singing::
Lance: Why do the guys always yell at me? I'm a southern gentleman, I'm from Mississippi, where do they come off yelling at me? Now my job is to sit here in the dark and wait for Joey, Chris, and Justin. Lucky me. ::30 seconds later:: Shake ya ass, but watch yo'self, shake ya ass, show me what you're working with, shake ya ass...yeah, I'm bad. Man, Justin was right that song is catchy!!
::Chris and Justin walk in unnoticed as Lance is singing Mystikal::
Chris: God Lance, are you ever gonna get off the "I wanna be just like Justin" deal. I'm not saying you have to go back to the "I wanna be just like Ellen" phase.
::Justin interrupting::
Justin: Yeah dawg, you can't be like mah fine ass self. Yo' better check yo'self befowah yo wreck yo'self, aight?
Lance: Oh! I'm so sorry guys, a southern gentleman like myself shouldn't be "rappin wit the homies". I didn't see you come in.
Justin: Yo, it's aiight, just don't be a foo', aiight?
Lance: Ooo! I get to go get JC now! Who wants to bet that he's in the back shooting up??
Chris: I'll put down 20, any takers?
Justin: Count mah fine self in.
::Lance skips away, with a smile on his face::
Justin: Dayum Chris! What are we gon' do bout our albino "I get no lovin" friend?
Chris: Man, I dunno. I just don't know.
::Lance and JC walk back in::
JC: Guys! Where the hell were you?
Chris: No, no, the question is where were YOU?
Justin: Chris, we KNOW where JC's ass was, yo.
Chris: Yeah, oh yeah.
JC: SHIT, where's Joey? It figures. Where the hell is he? I told him to be here 20 minutes ago! DAMN.
Justin: Yo JC dawg, maybe you should go call Jero...I mean his cell phone.
::JC gives Justin the "watch out or I'll bust out my cracked out karate skills on yo fine ass" look::
JC: I'll call him I guess.
::Dials number::
JC: WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?
Joey: Oh, I'm so sorry. I'll be right there.
::*NSNC waits for Joey::
::Joey walks in half asleep::
Joey: Sorry guys, Joey Junior just would'nt go to sleep last night! I was up all night takin care of him, and I had to bring him. I couldn't leave him with the sitter.
Lance: Ummm Joey, you have a bib around your neck.
Justin: Yo, yah got some spit on your cheek too, yo. Man yo' ass been fallin apart ever since yo big ol' butt (McDonald's video - "Joey's got a big ol butt") got laid that one night back in November.
JC: ::whispering to Justin:: Dude, thats a sensitive subject. Plus, major publicity!
Joey: Guys, I really have to apologize. Kelly and Joey Jr. have been taking most of time up lately. I haven't been giving been my one hundred and ten percent. But that's gonna change! Now, that I'm a real daddy instead of just a pimp daddy I know that I really wasn't working hard because being Joey Jr's Big daddy is the hardest thing I've ever done. Bein a dad is everything to me besides being the Y in *Nsync. If I wasn't in this group I wouldn't have gotten laid in November, and Kelly wouldn't have gotten pregnant. Joey Jr. is the second best thing that has ever happened to me...well uhh I take that back, remember that time back in March? Nevermind. Anyways things are gonna change around here.
Chris: Joey, did you ever stop to think that we didn't want things to change?
Lance: Yeah Joey, I thought I was the second best thing that has ever happened to you?!
Justin: Aiight Lance, check yo'self.
Lance: Whoopsies, sorry.
JC: Well I think I can sing for the guys, wait I mean talk for the guys...whoops...when I say that, we think you're a hard working dad, and we respect you for that. We just think you're a dumbass for not using protection while we're at the freakin peak of our careers, and YOU have to go and ruin it all so you can "go start a family". Man, stop thinking about yourself. I'm the gel in this group. Do you know how hard I've worked to get here?!?
Chris: EGO TRIP! Man JC, get youre head outta your ass! This isn't about you, I'm sick of this!! Do we wanna record another hit album or do YOU wanna go call Jerome?
JC: I AM NOT ON CRACK OK?
The guys: Sure, sure, yeah we believe you! ::wink wink::
Justin: Let's get this mofo record on the shelves so we can get some mo' bling bling, cus ya'll know the hunnies dig mah fine ass, yo.
Lance: Can't we all just get along?
Joey: NO, I can't handle being a boyfriend, dad, a backup singer, I mean in a group. I'm gonna have to quit until little Joey can talk and walk. Steve can take my place until then, people and paparazzi will mistake him for me and everything will be fine right? Yeah thats a great idea!
Chris: Wait, can Steve sing?
Joey: No, but can I?
Justin: Yo, dat's a good point, yo.
JC: Ok, we'll get Steve in here to record, Joe just go home or somethin'. Keep in touch buddy.
::Joey walks out the door with lil Joe in his arms saying "It's all for the best, right Joey?::
::Steve walks in with his camera::
Steve: Hey guys! How's the recording going? Where in the hell is Joe?
Justin: Yo' ass is takin over for a while.
Steve: You mean, I'm gonna get laid for being me?! Finally, there is a God!
- The End -
