O-Town walks out onto the stage. The studio audience of 4, claps gently.

Tommy -- Well, we all know you are a band started by Lou Pearlman, now tell us something we don't know about the O-Town boys.

Jacob -- I used to have a fro.

Tommy -- Everyone knows that, ass. I have a fro too, ya think that helps ME get chicks? Trust me, it doesn't work like I thought it would.. they still don't mistake me for Justin Timberlake.

Jacob -- But my fro was nice...

Tommy -- And now you have a mullet. I saw you at the Radio Music Awards, rat boy.

Jacob -- Really? That's funny.. we didn't see YOU there...

Tommy -- Are you taking a shot at me? Are you making fun of No Authority?!

Tommy reaches down to the table in front of him, grabs his beer can, and crushes it on Jacob's head.

Tommy -- Get off my stage. Next up, you.. pretty boy.

Ashley -- Hi! I'm Ashley Angel, it's a PLEASURE to be here.

Tommy -- Yeah.. whatever. So, your old girlfriend, she's one hot Momasita! What was it like banging her? Can I hit that now that you dumped her?

Ashley bursts into tears and runs off stage.

Tommy -- Gee, this is going well. Who's next.. You. *Tommy points at Erik*

Erik -- My name is Erik Michael Estrada

Tommy -- I don't care.

Suddenly, Eric runs out from backstage.

Eric -- HI! My name is Eric too! Eric Stretch, Eric LEE Stretch!

The two shake hands, and both freeze suddenly.

Eric & Erik -- Oh my God! You wear a FingerPal!

Both boys dissolve into giggles and compare their beaded black elastic hand accessories.

Tommy -- What the fuck are you two doing? This is MY show.

Eric & Erik look at each other, join their FingerPalled hands, and walk offstage.

Tommy -- Score, I'm getting rid of them easier than I thought I would. Two more, then I'm off to the strip joint. Moving on, eenie meenie minie moe *His pointing finger stops at Dan*

Dan -- I'm Dan.

Tommy -- Yeah, I know. You're the reject. How does that make you feel? By the way, your teeth are huge!

Dan -- At least I can FIT teeth in my mouth! YOU have a mini mouth !!

Tommy sits silently before reaching his hand up and touching his tiny lips. He suddenly pounces on Dan and begins beating him in the head. Trevor, seeing this, jumps on Tommy's back and begins beating HIM in the head. Danny and Ricky run from backstage. When he reaches the set, Danny takes off one of his clogs and whips it at Trevor's head, knocking him unconscious and off of Tommy.

Dan -- A shoe? Who throws a shoe?

Ricky -- Oh my God! They say that in Austin Powers. I was IN Austin Powers !!!

BoyPal bursts into his opening dance number from the movie.

Dan, Danny and Tommy all look at each other, then the three of them attack Ricky, kick his ass, and leave him laying in a crumpled heap on the stage.

As the lights dim, Dan, Danny, and Tommy stand, arms around each other.

Tommy -- Make sure to tune into Classy Pop next week, my guest is classy group of hotties Innosense, I'll probably get to do all five of them! And don't worry about Ricky.. he'll be fine! Bye!