9. You don't have any means of transportation besides matching pogo sticks

8. You always look fat, because no matter how much you weigh.. he's skinnier than you.

7. All of your kids are named Mortimer

6. He makes you dye your hair to match his skunk streak.

5. The only music he listens to is Jacko & Destiny's Child so now that's all you'll be hearing too.

4. After 6 months always seeing his ass won't be attractive or funny anymore.

3. You'll have to call him "Eric. Eric Stretch. Eric Lee Stretch." before he'll pay attention to you.

2. Yeah, that gray sweater is cute, but you like a man to have more than one shirt in his wardrobe.

1. Smoke weed everyday...