The first time that Lance and I made love was the night of my 18th birthday.
His parents had gone out for the evening, leaving us with the house to ourselves.
We lay together afterwards, wrapped up in the security of one another's armsbreathing as one. Listening to the silence, and relishing the feeling of just being so close.
"I love you" He whispered into my ear, laying a gentle kiss on my cheek.
I curled up closer to him, and sighed happily.
"I love you too."
"I want to spend the rest of my life with you, Liz." He said suddenly.
His words almost shocked me. Lance had never spoken of such a strong commitment before.
Sure, we had agreed that we loved one another, and that we wanted to be together, but the words "forever" or "for the rest of my life" had never been uttered between us.
I looked at him in disbelief, and he leaned in to kiss me softly.
"Do you mean that?" I asked him when our kiss had ended.
He smiled, and nodded.
"You mean...forever?" I continued, searching his face.
"And a day." He promised, pulling me closer to him.
We fell asleep there, and never had I slept so soundly.
The next morning, he had to sneak me out the front door, so that his parents wouldn't realize that I had been there all night.
It was while we sat in the car, saying our good-byes when he slipped his class ring onto my finger.
"Lance" I stuttered, watching the light catch the stone in the ring and send little patterns of light across the ceiling of the car, "I can't take this..."
"Of course you can!" He assured me, pulling the hand he had slipped it on to his lips and kissing each of my fingers in turn.
"But what does it mean?" I asked him.
He smiled at me, and then looked at the dashboard coyly.
"Well, I suppose it means that you're mine" He said thoughtfully, "That no matter what happens, we're always going to be together."
Tears spilled down my cheeks. He looked over at me, and reached over to wipe them away.
"I love you so much, Princess." He smiled into my eyes.
I smiled back at him, running my fingers down the side of his face.
"I love you too, cowboy." I answered, using the nickname I had given him long before we had even gotten together.
"Well, you'd best get in there before they figure out you're not home." He said, looking at the front door of my house, and then back to me.
I nodded sadly, not wanting to ever let the moment end.
He leaned across the seat and kissed me softly, I wrapped my arms around his neck and held on as tight as I could.
"I'll call you." He promised.
"I'll be waiting." I answered.
I got out of the car, and watched him leave. He waved as he drove away, and I waved back, blowing him a kiss, which he pretended to catch in the air.
I cradled Poo-Foo in my arms, and sat down gingerly at the end of Lance's bed.
The bed was unmade, and his clothes from the previous night still lay in a heap on the floor where he had left them.
I could see my reflection in the mirror across from the bed; A mirror which he had surrounded with pictures of he and I. I smiled happily at myself from those pictures, captured moments from happier days which were now only memories.
I smiled despite myself when I noticed that he hadn't bothered to clean up where I had written, "I LOVE YOU" in lipstick across the top of his mirror. It almost made me happy to know that one of the last things he had seen was that messageThat when he left the house that morning to start that fateful journey to wherever, he had at least known that I loved him I sat Poo-Foo down on the bed, and went to the mirror. I gently ran my fingers over the words. As I did, I stared into his face on our prom picture.
"I love you, cowboy." I said hoarsely, tears dripping off my chin onto the dresser below. "I love you so damned much."
Poo-Foo meowed from his perch on the bed, and I turned back to him. The cat had been Lance's and my pet combinedWe found him as a tiny kitten, wandering his way along the side of the street...his tiny yellow eyes having barely opened.
"Babe! We can't just let the poor thing get hit by a car!"
I continued to plead with Lance to go back for it, and he finally agreed.
I cuddled the tiny ball of fur in my hands, and nuzzled him next to my cheek all the way back to my house.
Lance grinned over at me amusedly as I talked soothingly to the little kitten.
What I had forgotten, is that my sister was deathly allergic to cat hair.
Lance and I took the baby cat out onto the porch, and began to rack our brains for how we could solve the dilemma.
"We could take him to the pound...maybe someone will adopt him." Lance suggested, as he scratched the little creature on top of the head.
"No!" I cried in protest, "Lance...They'll kill him!"
Lance looked thoughtful for a long time, and then scooped the kitty up into his hands.
"You sure are a cute little thing, aren't ya?" He said to the cat.
"Yeah" I agreed, "He's a precious little poo-foo!" Lance looked at me strangely.
"Poo-Foo?" He asked with a chuckle.
I shrugged, "I dunno! It just sounded right!"
"Well damn" Lance drawled, "Now that you have a name, we can't right get rid of ya, can we?" He touched noses with the kitten, which mewed at him in return.
"So you'll keep him?" I cried happily.
Lance sighed, and rolled his eyes back in his head in a mocking gesture of defeat.
"I suppose" He groaned, giving me a crooked smile.
"Thank you, baby!" I screeched, hugging him around the neck as hard as I could.
"Hey now! Careful!" He told me, "You'll crush little Poo-Foo."
I took the kitten from him, and lay a kiss on top of his tiny gray head.
"Ya hear that, little guy?" I asked him, "You've got a home!"
"Poo-Foo!" Lance laughed to himself, "What a name for a cat!"
I curled up on the bed with Poo-Foo in my arms. The cat began to purr immediately, rubbing his head up against my chin. I reached down and scratched the top of his head lovingly.