[I’m mad. No, I take that back. I’m livid! Earlier this afternoon I was writing chapter 30 and for some odd reason, when I tried to save it, my computer shut off! I lost it! I was almost done and I lost the whole thing! Last time that happened I didn’t write on the story for over a month. Guys, don’t let me do that this time okay? Meanwhile, I hope you like this one. And again, thank you all for your wonderful reviews. So many of you seem to just fall in the story and I can’t tell you how much that means to me. Thank you!]

Without hesitating, Nick flung open the door to Brian’s room. “Brain?” He called, alarmed. Ellie’s reaction had scared the crap out of him and he expected the worst. Brian looked up at Nick, his face an expression of distress. Nick sat down on the edge of the bed, his heart aching. “God, Bri, what’s wrong?”

“Hopeless.” Brian finally whispered after a few false starts.

“What’s hopeless? Your voice?” Nick asked softly.

Brian nodded miserably.

“Is that what the doctor said? The therapist?” Nick asked, a hint of annoyance evident in his voice. Who were they to make that judgment? They didn’t know Brian. They didn’t know how strong he was.

“Didn’t ‘ave to.” Brian bowed his head forward, trying to keep his emotions from getting the better of him.

Nick’s heart thudded in his chest. “Bri, no. You can’t give up now. Come on, what about that strong faith of yours? You‘ve gone through so much and have gotten through it all. This won’t be any different. I know you can do this!” Nick urged, almost pleading him.

Brian smiled weakly at Nick, wishing he had as much faith in himself that Nick had in him. “Thank you.”

Nick returned the smile, relieved to see Brian smile. But as soon as Brian’s smile appeared, it vanished. “Now what?” Nick questioned, worried all over again.

“I think...I...hurt Ellie...” Brian whispered, his eyes moving past Nick, towards the door.

“Um...” Nick trailed off, remembering the hurt look in Ellie’s eyes.

“Didn’t...mean to...” Brian whispered, looking pained. “I...couldn’t...”

“Bri, don’t worry about it. I’m sure she understands. This isn’t easy for any of us, but ya gotta think where she is coming from. This is all totally foreign to her and she is probably totally overwhelmed. I’ll talk to her okay?” Nick tried his best to reassure Brian.

“Get her?” Brian asked, hopefully.

“Sure. Do you need anything else? Pain meds or anything?”

Brian shook his head.

“Alright. She’s probably in the waiting room bugging Kevin or something. I’ll be right back okay?”

Brian nodded and whispered, “thank you,” again.

“Anytime, buddy.” Nick replied with a grin before slipping out the door.

~*~*~*~*~*~

“Um, miss?”

I lifted my face from my hands. “Y-yes? Oh, shit, I’m sorry. I guess could you take me to...” I trailed off. Where did I think I was going to go? My apartment? Riiiiight, and be greeted by all those reporters asking a million questions. No thank you. I didn’t want to go to any of my friends’ houses because it would be the same kind of thing. No one had any idea what was going on and they were going to want to ask a lot of questions. I just wanted to shut it all out and pretend like it hadn’t happened.

Why did I have to go get that stupid mocha? Why couldn’t Jack’s plane have left a little later? Then I never would have been in that coffee shop at just the right time. Or wrong time, I guess...

“Where would you like me to take you?” The cabbie interrupted my thoughts again. He was peering at me through his rearview mirror, his concern growing.

“I um, I don’t know. Could we just drive around for a few more minutes. Until I...just so I can...think...” I stammered.

He glanced uncertainly at the growing meter. “If you say so...”

I nodded, sinking back against the seat. God, I wished Jack were here. Fresh tears started flowing and I shut my eyes. What was I going to do??

~*~*~*~*~

Nick bit his lip as he shut the door to Brian’s room. He was a little more worried about the whole situation with Brian than he was trying to let on. Brian was upset enough about it and if Nick added his own worries, it would only make Brian feel worse.

Now he was just going to go get Ellie so at least everyone would feel better on that aspect. He punched in the code to their private waiting room and went in. “Hey Ellie, Brian wants-” Nick stopped when he saw that Ellie wasn’t in there. It was only Kevin and he looked up at Nick from the couch.

“Ellie hasn’t been here. Nick? What’s wrong?” Kevin paused when he saw the look on Nick’s face. “Nick?”

“Shit! Where could she...the stairwell!” Nick turned and all but ran down the hall to the exit where he had found Ellie the last time she had disappeared.

Kevin started after him, confused. “Nick, wait! What’s going on?” He demanded.

Nick ignored him, taking the stairs two at a time. He had a sinking feeling in his stomach that she wasn’t going to be sitting on the top landing. She wasn’t.

“Nick, what-” Kevin tried again, growing impatient.

“She’s gone! Sonofabitch!” Nick swore.

“Gone? What do you mean gone?” Kevin narrowed his eyes.

“We were in the conference room ca-” Nick cut himself off, remember that they were keeping their mission a secret. “Anyway, she left to go to Brian’s room. A few minutes later I headed down there and before I got there, she came flying out of his room and crashed into me. She said that Brian was really upset and that he needed me. But when I tried to get her to come with me, she said that Brian didn’t want her in there. I tried to tell her that was crazy, but she wouldn’t come. I was anxious to make sure Brian was okay so I went ahead and went in his room. I figured she’d just come back to the waiting room. Dammit, Kev, she was so upset. Brian didn’t mean anything by it. He probably just didn’t want to make her worry about him or something.” Nick explained hurriedly.

“Maybe she went back to her apartment. Not the smartest idea, but it’s not the end of the world. We can just have Howie and AJ stop by there on their way back up here.” Kevin tried to reason.

“No Kevin, you don’t understand. Remember that psycho reporter? Leon? He cornered Ellie and I again after all that shit went down in the hallway when he attacked us. Not to mention, when Brian finds out that Ellie is gone, he’s going to be really upset. He already feels horrible.” Nick ran his hand through his hair. “I don’t think she would go back to her apartment anyway. There were a ton of reporters there when we were there right after the surgery.”

“We need to find her.” Kevin stated.

“And we need to do it before Brian finds out she’s gone and before Leon finds her first.” Nick added, letting the heavy stairwell door fall shut behind them.