I stared at Kevin, too afraid to ask what the caller had said. From the pained expression on the eldest Backstreet Boy’s face, I knew it couldn’t be good. A myriad of emotions flickered through his eyes. Anger, relief, worry, and finally grief.
“Kevin?” Brian whispered, a slight tremor in his voice. I still had a tight grip on his hand and I could feel it shaking.
“Oh God, is he…he-“ AJ uttered, unable to say the words out loud.
“No, he’s alive.” Kevin assured us quickly. There was a collective sigh of relief, but Kevin’s face remained just as serious.
“So he’s okay then, right?” Howie asked, anxiously.
Kevin sighed. “No, not really. He’s down in the E.R. I need to get down there, I’ll explain as soon as I can.” He explained, already getting up.
“Wait a sec, Kevin. There’s more to this. What the hell’s going on? Where did they find him? Why isn’t he okay?!” AJ exclaimed.
“ Not now, Alex, I need to get down there.” Kevin said hastily.
“Then I’m coming with you.” AJ announced.
“Yeah me too!” Howie added.
I almost joined in, but the look on Brian’s faced stilled my tongue. Obviously, Brian wouldn’t be able to go down to the E.R. and I could tell he was growing extremely frustrated and upset with the situation. Not to mention, the stress of not knowing what was going on with his best friend probably wasn’t helping.
“Why don’t you just tell us what’s going on?” I suggested softly.
They all turned to look at me, mildly surprised. Finally, Kevin held up his hands in surrender. “Okay fine, I don’t know much, but this is what the officer told me. They found Nick in some janitorial closet. He was unconscious and evidently drugged. He hasn’t completely regained consciousness, but he’s trying to come out of it. They don’t want him to be alone when he does wake up.”
“Drugged?!” Brian cried, horrified.
“That sonofabitch! I’m going to kill him!” AJ seethed, his face turning red. I only sat there, shocked at what Kevin had just told us. I nearly started crying before a red hot flash of anger coursed through me. A fierce loathing burned through my veins and I couldn’t help but wonder if I looked as nuts as AJ did at the moment.
“I’m still coming with you.” Howie insisted through clenched teeth.
“So am I.” AJ growled.
“Me too.” I stared Kevin down, daring him to tell me no.
“No.”
“What?!” The three of us balked, almost in unison.
“First of all, we can’t all go parading down into the E.R. Come on guys, be reasonable. Besides, we aren’t leaving Brian in here by himself either. Howie, you’re with me. AJ and Ellie, you guys stay here.” Before we could argue, he held a hand up again. “I’ll call as soon as he regains consciousness or as soon as we know anything. Meanwhile, I do not want either one of you to leave this room for any reason. Got me?” Kevin ordered, sternly.
“Fine.” AJ grumbled, unhappily.
I just nodded. As much as I wanted to go see Nick, I also didn’t want to leave Brian. He probably wanted to be down there with Nick more than anyone, but it was beyond his control.
“We’ll talk soon.” Kevin promised, stopping to give his cousin’s shoulder a reassuring squeeze.
I bit my lip as Kevin and Howie left. Drugged? Leon had drugged Nick? Why would he do that and just leave Nick in some closet? “This is really screwed up,” I remarked softly.
“He’s going to be okay, right?” Brian, looked first to AJ, then to me.
AJ just put his head in his hands. “I’m sure he will be, hun.” I assured, quickly, kicking AJ’s foot with my own.
AJ scowled at me before standing up. “I wish we knew what was going on.”
“Kevin had a point, AJ. We couldn’t all go traipsing down to the E.R. And we sure as hell couldn’t leave Bri here by himself.” I pointed out reasonably.
AJ nodded. “I know. I just hate feeling so helpless.”
There was a tone in AJ’s voice that tugged at my heart. “What do you mean? You haven’t been helpless at all.”
“Please, Ellie. I’ve been nothing but helpless since the beginning.” AJ said, bitterly.
“AJ?” Brian looked up at his younger friend, concerned about the burden that seemed to be resting on his shoulders.
AJ’s shoulders sagged. “Brian, remember the night you found out about your heart? Remember after the concert how you collapsed in that hallway and I caught you?”
Brian nodded.
“I can’t tell you how bad you scared me. I was afraid that you might have had a heart attack right then and there. I was afraid that…that you were going to die in my arms. Even when we got you into the dressing room, you looked so sick. After that, we all tried to watch you. I’d watch you so close, looking for the slightest possibility that something might happen again. Then that morning you disappeared. You scared us shitless, Bri. Then we get a call from some random chick who’s in hysterics, taking you to the hospital!”
I bit on one of my nails. I know how terrified I was when I made that call, but I never really thought about how it must have affected the guys. Then there was that familiar look in AJ’s eyes. He had the same look the evening this all started, as he told me the story about Brian collapsing in the hallway. I vividly remembered how overwhelmed I felt as AJ and I sat in Brian’s rented Jeep and talked. I’d been thrown into something I never imagined possible. I also remembered how upset AJ’d been. Now, I was beginning to see a little deeper into it all.
“Alex…”
“Then you go into surgery and I don’t know if I’m ever going to see you alive again. But then your doctor comes out and tells us that things are going great and they’re almost done with you. But, too much times passes and we start getting worried. Then they come out and tell us there are complications and you might not make it! God, Brian…” AJ rushed on, oblivious to Brian’s interruption.
I could only stare, stunned by AJ’s blunt words. “AJ…” I said softly, unsure that this was the best time to lay all this on Brian. But it was Brian, this time, that shook his head slightly at me.
“But you did, and we were all okay. We were so relieved. Until we found out your voice was gone. Brian, man, if anyone asks, I’ll deny I ever said it, but you have a voice like an angel. And to see that taken away from you and then to see the effect that had on you…it was too much, man. I didn’t know how much more I could take. But then comes the real kicker! Some psycho comes and knocks Ellie and Nick around. Then corners us in here. I left you and Ellie alone in here with that madman! I fuckin’ left you.” His voice lowered until it was nearly a whisper.
“AJ! You didn’t have a choice! He had a gun! He could have shot any one of us!” I exclaimed, unable to keep quiet any longer.
“Did a lot of good too, didn’t it?!” AJ retorted, with a bitter laugh. “He tried to strangle you and probably would have gone after Bri next.”
“But he didn’t, Alex.” Brian whispered.
“Well he could have!” AJ snapped, beginning to pace again. “And then he kidnaps and drugs Nicky. I did a lot of good there, too, didn’t I?”
Brian glanced helplessly at me. I shook my head, not knowing what to do. The raw emotion that was coming from this poor man was heart wrenching.
“AJ, none of this is your fault.” Brian said softly.
AJ stopped his frantic pacing and his shoulders sagged. “It should have been me.”
“What?” Brian glanced at me again, then to AJ.
AJ, however, wouldn’t face him. “I’m so sorry, Brian. And here I am, just making it all worse.”
“What do you mean?” AJ remained silent. “Come on, Alex, talk to me,” Brian urged, carefully.
Finally, AJ turned around, his eyes shining with unshed tears. “Bri, I don’t think you have any idea what an incredible person you are. Never in my life have I met anyone so selfless and caring. You put everyone’s needs before your own, even when you’re going through this hell. You don’t deserve this, any of this. I should have been the one faced with all this. I’m not half the person you are, yet you’re the one who’s forced to go through more than what anyone should ever have to go through in a lifetime.”
“AJ…” Brian whispered, his own eyes tearing up.
But AJ held up a hand. “Let me finish. I don’t know when, but I finally realized something. It couldn’t have been me, ya know? I couldn’t go through everything that you have. I’m not strong enough. Despite everything, you haven’t let it change you. You haven’t let yourself get bitter and angry. You’re still the same sweet, gentle Brian.” AJ laughed bitterly. “I could never have done it, I’m not as strong as you.”
As AJ paced back in front of Brian again, Brian managed to grab AJ’s arm. AJ tried to pull away, but Brian’s grip was strong and he managed to pull the younger singer down to his level. Before AJ had a chance to figure out what had happened, Brian had wrapped him up in a fierce hug.
“I’m so sorry, AJ! I had no idea you were carrying around that kind of burden. I’m so sorry…” Brian whispered, his tears wetting AJ’s shirt.
AJ resisted at first, but finally relaxed. He returned Brian’s embrace, finally feeling relief. He felt drained, but like a major weight had been lifted from his chest. “Bri, I’d take all this from you in a heartbeat,” he whispered.
“I know” Brian whispered back, hugging AJ tighter.
I watched this whole scene with tears streaming down my face. Never had I felt so moved. I’d always suspected there was a little more to AJ McLean than was ever portrayed in the media. But this, this just blew me away. I must have been sniffling a little louder than I thought because I heard soft chuckling.
“Aw, El, come ‘ere.” AJ grinned, wiping his eyes.
Gingerly I got up and sat down on the other edge of the bed. Without a word, they both enfolded me in a big hug. I smiled, an arm wrapped around each one of them. Finally, things were starting to look up.
“I don’t suppose we’ll be winning any beauty contests,” I joked.
“Pshh! Speak for yourself, El.” AJ scoffed.
Brian grinned. “Uh, I’d have to agree with her, J. Look in a mirror.”
“Oh shut up.”
Brian and I snickered, causing AJ to make a face at us. But then Brian sobered. “I’m worried about Nick. I wish Kevin’d call us.”
“He will, bud. As soon as he knows something.” AJ assured.
Kevin and Howie wasted no time getting to the E.R. They wanted to get there before Nick woke up in case he started freaking out. Several bodyguards followed behind the two oldest Boys as they went through the E.R. doors and up to the main desk. They were promptly directed to the private room that held the youngest Boy. Kevin and Howie immediately went in while the bodyguards stationed themselves outside the door.
Kevin’s heart leapt into his throat as he caught the sight of his little brother. Nick was still unconscious. Despite being over six feet tall, he looked very small in the big hospital bed. His face was very pale and he was hooked up to several machines.
Howie couldn’t help but think that this was what Brian looked like only a few days ago. It was upsetting to see Nick like this now. He glanced at Kevin, swallowing hard. Kevin smiled weakly at Howie, hoping to reassure the younger man. Howie sat down in the nearest chair and took a gentle hold of Nick’s hand.
Kevin took in Nick’s appearance with a heavy heart. The boy was so pale. Kevin also noted a bandage peaking out from the back of Nick’s blond hair. Did that bastard hit Nick?! Kevin was about to bring it to Howie’s attention when the door opened. Kevin whirled around quickly, but relaxed when he saw it was just Dr. Johanson.
“Hi, guys.” Dr. Johanson greeted quietly. His eyebrows were knitted together in concern. He felt a great deal of sympathy for these poor kids that have gone through so much. Now this.
“Dr. Johanson, are you Nick’s doctor too?” Kevin asked, getting up from the chair he’d settled into. Howie nodded in acknowledgement, but didn’t get up.
“Yes, well, sort of. I wasn’t here when they brought him in, but I took over his case when I found out about it.” After seeing Kevin’s perplexed look, he added, “Even though I specialize in cardiac, I’ve spent a lot of my rotations in the E.R.”
Kevin nodded. “What happened? How did they find him? Is he going to be okay?”
Dr. Johanson held a hand up. “One at a time. An officer found him in a janitorial closet. Funny thing is, that closet had already been searched. First thing we found was a blunt trauma to the head-“
“Leon hit him?” Howie interrupted.
“We don’t know for sure who-“
“It was him,” Howie spat, interrupting again.
“D…” Kevin said, giving Howie a look.
“While we have been able to confirm that Nick was drugged, we haven’t gotten the lab results back determining what he was given. Fortunately, whatever he was given didn’t put him in any mortal danger. He’ll probably be very sick, but he hasn’t had any respiratory distress.” The doctor reported.
“When do you think he’ll wake up?” Kevin asked, anxiously.
“Only time will tell. Shouldn’t be too much longer. When he does, the police are going to want to question him. Make sure they call me.”
Kevin nodded.
Dr. Johanson turned before going out the door. “How’s Brian?”
“Doing better, but worried as hell,” Kevin smiled ruefully.
Dr. Johanson nodded before disappearing back into the busy E.R. It wasn’t but ten minutes later that Nick began to stir. He started moaning softly.
“Nicky? Wake up, kiddo,” Howie urged.
“That’s right, come on Carter. We need your lazy butt to wake up, okay?” Kevin added, hoping to coax Nick out of his slumber.
Nick moaned again, bringing a hand up to cover his eyes. “Ohhh…”
“Can you dim the lights?” Howie looked anxiously up to Kevin. Without a word, Kevin jumped up and flipped one of the switches. The bright light right over Nick’s bed switched off, leaving the main overhead light. The room was still bright, but at least the light wasn’t blaring right by the head of Nick’s bead.
“Nicky, come on, wake up.” Kevin gently pushed.
“What’s wrong with me?” Nick whispered, his forehead breaking out in a sweat.
“Do you remember anything?” Howie asked, still holding Nick’s hand.
“No…Shit, what’s wrong with me? I feel so sick,” he groaned.
“You were kidnapped, Nick. You were missing for over 26 hours.” Kevin explained carefully.
“Leon…” Nick mumbled. “He drugged me.”
“Yes, he did. Howie, get someone.” Kevin instructed.
Nick struggled to sit up. “No! Ugh, I’m going to be sick.”
Howie grabbed for the basin and held it under Nick, just in time. Unfortunately, Nick’s stomach was empty so all he could do was dry heave a few times. Kevin held Nick’s forehead as his whole body trembled with exertion. When there wasn’t anything left, Nick leaned back into the bed, still shaking.
“What did he give me?” Nick groaned, the whole room spinning around him. This was worse than any hangover he’d ever had. Never had he felt so disoriented and sick. Not to mention, his head was positively aching.
“We don’t know, Nicky. They’re running tests, but Brian’s doctor seems to think that the drugs weren’t intended to cause you any real harm. Just make you sick.” Kevin told him.
The mention of Brian’s name sparked something in Nick. “Brian?! Where is he?!” He demanded, his voice shaky.
“Relax, he’s fine. AJ and Ellie are with him.” Howie assured the young singer.
Nick shook his head vigorously. He was about ready to argue that no, Brian wasn’t fine, when another wave of nausea overtook him. “I need to get to him!” Nick cried, stumbling out of his bed.
“Nick! What are you doing? You can’t go anywhere!” Kevin argued, making a grab for Nick.
Nick moaned as his knees buckled and the ground lurched up at him. He nearly hit the ground, his sides heaving, when Kevin caught him and lifted him back into the bed. Kevin kept a firm grip on Nick as he painfully dry heaved some more.
“Howie, go see if they can give him something to calm him down!” Kevin ordered sharply, still holding the younger boy in his arms. “Deep breaths, Nicky. Come on, just take it easy. You just gotta work this shit through your system.”
“Oh god, Kevin.” Nick whimpered, his whole body racked with chills.
Howie dashed out the door as Nick continued to tremble. “Geez, Nick, what did that bastard do to you? Nearly tried to kill you, it looks like…” Kevin muttered, angrily. It killed him that there was nothing he could do to ease Nick’s pain.
“No, Kev. You don’t understand.” Nick moaned, too weak to try to get up again. “It’s Brian he wants. I’m just a diversion.”
~*~*~*~*~*~
Charlie jumped slightly as his cell phone chirped from the clip on his belt. He immediately snatched it up, the magazine article forgotten. It was nearing the end of his shift and he was relieved that everything had gone smoothly. They’d considered having two guards outside Littrell’s room, but with him being in the ICU ward still, it really wasn’t necessary. No one could go in or out with out clearance and he sure as hell wasn’t letting anyone in Brian’s room without a badge.
Charlie hated to admit it, but he couldn’t help feeling bad for the poor kid. He’d been through so much. At least Carter had been found. Hopefully he was okay. They were a good bunch of kids, even if he wasn’t a big fan of their music.
“Banks here.” He answered gruffly.
“Charlie? It’s Kevin. Could you find Mac and come down to the E.R.? We have some questions that you might be able to help us with.”
“Sure thing, kid. Who’s gonna man my post?” Charlie asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Taylor’s on his way up. Don’t bother waiting for him, just come on down, okay?”
“On my way, then. Say, why’re you whispering?” Charlie inquired, skeptically.
“Nick’s sleeping. He’s had a rough time of it. Didn’t want to wake him.”
Charlie shook his head. “He doin’ okay, then?”
“Yeah, he’ll be fine. So, are you on your way?”
“Be there in five.” Charlie snapped the phone shut, wondering what the rush was. Whatever it was, Kevin sounded pretty urgent. Maybe it had something to do with that creep that’s been harassing them. Charlie hoped they’d catch him. Quickly, he popped his head into the room and told the three of them where he was going. After making him promise to tell Kevin to call them, they let him go. It took him about fifteen minutes to locate Mac. “Richardson called. He wants us down in the E.R. I think they might have a lead on this creep.”
Mac grinned. “Good. Who’s taking over for you?”
“Richardson said Taylor was on his way up.”
Mac nodded his approval. “Let’s go then.
It was nearly twenty-five minutes after he’d gotten the phone call that Charlie went into Nick’s room with Mac in tow. Kevin was sitting on the bed beside Nick, rubbing his back as the poor kid heaved into a basin. Howie was pacing back and forth, anxiously.
“We’re here.” Charlie announced unnecessarily. The Carter kid looked awful. Sweaty and pale with very flushed cheeks. Poor kid was trembling to boot. Charlie shook his head again, unhappy to see someone in so much pain.
Kevin looked up in surprise. “What are you doing here?”
Charlie looked at Mac, perplexed. “What do you mean? You just called me and asked me to come down here, with him.” Charlie gestured over his shoulder at Mac.
“What? No, I didn’t. What are you talking about?” Kevin demanded, confused.
Charlie narrowed his eyes. “You called me about twenty-five minutes ago. Told me to come down here and said that Taylor was on his way up to take over. Told me not to wait for Taylor to get there. Told me to bring Mac too. You were whispering cause Carter was sleeping.” He stopped, his heart rate quickening. Nick was wide-awake.
Kevin paled. “That wasn’t me.”
