Fall From Grace
Chapter 14
By Tee and
Danielle
(C) by us too.
We don't know them, they don't know us. Fiction.
yada yada yada.
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Kevin let out a breath
he didn't even know he was holding. Nick was ok. He
hadn't murdered
him. He looked at Nick and instead of looking relieved, Nick
looked like he
was about to burst into tears.
"Nick?"
Nick turned towards Kevin
and the look on his face broke his heart. Tears
were shining on the rim
of his eyes, so much as a blink would send them
skittering over the edge, and
his teeth chewed into his bottom lip. His
fingers clawed at the chair, trying
to hold back the bile that was rising in
his throat. 'I have got to be
strong. I HAVE got to be STRONG. I...'
His thoughts were interrupted as
Kevin knew exactly what Nick was trying to
do. He never wanted to see a
day when Nick had to swallow his feelings to
keep them from him. He got
up out of his chair and went over to Nick's.
Before Nick knew what was
happening, Kevin grabbed Nick and had him hugged
close to him.
Nick
tried to stay strong, he really did. But he knew it was hopeless when
Kevin's
arms came around him. Kevin's strong, safe arms. The arms he was
looking at
spending the rest of his life without. It was unthinkable to him.
With a soft
choking sound he buried his face in Kevin's neck and let the
tears flow.
"I...I'm sorry."
Kevin held Nick tighter, whispering in his ear, "Never,
ever be sorry for
being well. It would kill me to know I hurt you. That I was
the reason that
our children would be deprived of the most wonderful father
they could ask
for. I'll die a million deaths with a smile on my face,
knowing that you're
ok."
Dr. Sullivan sat at his desk, doing
everything in his power not to cry right
along with them. He had never seen a
love so beautiful and complete than
with these two before him. They
instinctively knew each other on some base
level that cut right through
everything and spoke to the core of the other.
A little while later,
Nick's tears ceased. He was all cried out. At least
for
now. He raised his head up from Kevin's neck and looked at his
husband.
His lover. His best friend.
"I love you so much,
Bumpkin. What am I going to do without you in my life?
You've always
been by my side. How am I suppose to go on without you?"
"When you
feel like you can't go on any more just look at Dylan and our
baby
daughter. They are the reason to go on without me. Do you
understand that,
Nick?"
Nick just nodded his head *yes*. He
didn't trust himself to speak at that
moment.
Kevin softly pressed his
lips against Nick's and said, "I love you, Nickers.
I love you with every
ounce of my being. When you look at the kids you
remember how much I
love you."
Dr. Sullivan wiped the back of his hand across his eyes.
He cleared his
throat and said, "Um, Kevin, have you decided what you want to
do about
yourself?"
It was a moment before Kevin could tear his gaze
away from Nick's. Finally
he looked at the doctor and said, "I'll take
whatever medications there is
that will help keep me *comfortable*. No
chemo. My time is going to be
limited. I don't want to waste a
moment of it in the bathroom throwing my
guts up because of
chemo."
Dr. Sullivan nodded his head, "I can certainly understand
that. We'll deal
with your symptoms as they arise. Both the
cancer and the AIDS can spawn
other illnesses as we all well know. I
know you want to stay out of the
hosptial as much as possible. I know
of a private home health care
organization that deals with caring for
patients with terminal illnesses.
They took great care of my mother when she
was dying of breast cancer. I
can arrange for them to start seeing you
whenever needed. That is if you
want me too."
Kevin nodded his
head, "Yes, that would be good if you could arrange that.
Thank you. Do
you think I'll live to see the new baby born?"
Nick jerked as though he
had been slapped. Kevin couldn't die that soon.
No, no, he just
couldn't. They had to have more time together.
Dr. Sullivan said,
"I hope so, Kevin. I honest to God hope so."
No promises. No
guarantees. Nick and Kevin walked out of the doctor's
office with
silent prayers that if God really did grant miracles, he would
have the grace
to grant them one.
They were quiet on the elevator ride down to the
lobby. The doors opened
and before they could step out they were
surprised to see Sam and Melinda
standing there.
Sam squealed, "Guys,
what are you doing here?!"
Kevin shot Nick a look and said, "I had a
doctor's appointment. What about
you? And where's my boy
at?"
Sam said, "I'm here to get an ultrasound done. It's perfect
you guys are
here. You have to come in with us."
Kevin and Nick
smiled and said that would be awesome. They got back in the
elevator
and headed towards the 5th floor. Melinda told them that *cousin*
Brian
had came by and picked Dylan up. They were going to the park and then
off to
play some basketball.
In the clinic, the technician led them to the
ultrasound room and got Sam
ready. Melinda stood on one side of the
table and held Sam's hand while
Nick and Kevin stood on the other side of the
table. The monitor was turned
around so they all could see it.
The technician pointed out features such
as the baby's head and fingers and
toes. There was exclaimations of joy
when they saw the baby's heart
beat.
The technician said, "You've got yourself a very healthy baby girl
there,
Sam. She is absolutely perfect."
Everybody grinned. Nick
and Kevin were struggling so hard not to cry.
Suddenly the technician said,
"Oh my."
Four worried gazes turned in her direction. Melinda asked,
"What's wrong?
Please don't say there is anything wrong."
Linda, the
technician, smiled and said, "Nothing is wrong. Look."
She
pointed to the screen showing them something. It took a moment
before
anybody realized what they were looking at.
Sam said, "Oh my
God. I'm pregnant with twins. Oh my God."
Linda said,
"Yep. From the looks of it, you're got twin girls,
Sam.
Congratulations."
Twins. Kevin began crying. Two
babies. Two baby girls. He couldn't
believe it. His life
was ending but God was blessing them with another
child. One life ends,
another begins. This was their miracle. They prayed
for a cure so
Kevin could live but God gave them two daughters instead of
one. Yes,
this was their miracle.
Nick was crying as well. He knew exactly what
Kevin was feeling at that
moment because he was feeling the exact same
thing. He caught Kevin when
Kevin's knees started to give out on
him. Kevin fell against Nick and both
men sobbed.
Sam sat up and
said, "What the hell? Guys what is going on?"
Melinda came around
the table so that she was next to them. "Guys, this is
more about the
babies isn't it? Why were you here at the hospital today?"
Kevin
pulled away from Nick and wiped at his eyes. He looked at Sam
and
Melinda, both of their looks of happiness from just seconds ago replaced
now
with a lot of concern and fear.
"I'm dying. I might not even
be here to see the girls be born."
Melinda's hand flew to her mouth to
try and stifle the sobs that fell. Sam
looked at Kevin in disbelief,
"No, you can't dye. No, no, no. You're big
strong Kevin.
You can't die. How can you die and leave Dylan? Damn you.
Damn
you Kevin. DAMN YOU!!!"
Melinda tried to wrap her arms around
Sam but Sam shrugged her off. Kevin
cried, "I'm sorry, Sam. I'm
so sorry. I have AIDS. And I already have
cancer from the
AIDS. I don't want to leave Dylan. I swear I don't. I
don't
want to hurt him the way my daddy hurt me."
Sam's hysterical sobs echoed
through out the corridors of the clinic.