You Do What You Have To Do
Chapter 56 
By: Danielle and Tee (this part by Danielle)
(C) by us too. 
**************************************************
 
An hour later, I had to cut Kevin off.  For his own safety.
 
He was popping tums like they were candy. 
 
Finally, I just grabbed the roll of them and shoved them down the front 
of my jeans.  "If you want them, you are going to have to come and get them.
And trust me on this, I will fight you every step of the way."  
 
He looked at me like I was crazy.  "Give them back, Nick." 
 
I shook my head, "Kevin, you are scaring me."  I sat down and tangled my 
fingers in my hair, "If things don't go well with your mom......"  I took 
a breath forcing myself to ask what I wanted to know. What I was afraid to 
know, "Are you going to leave me?"  I stared at the floor between my feet, 
afraid to look at him.  
 
I figured my question had done one of two things. Surprised him that I 
knew the way he was thinking or pissed him off for doubting him.  He was 
silent.  Damn.  If it was the pissed off option, I would have heard the 
tongue lashing start by now.  Damn. Damn. Damn.  I dig my fingernails into 
the cushion of the chair I was sitting on, willing myself to stand up and 
walk out of there before my heart got ripped out of my chest again.  
 
Actually too late.  With every second of silence, my heart was being 
stretched further and further out of my chest. I just knew any second it 
was going to be stretched too far and snap.  Dammit! I had risked everything
telling my parents about us and now that it was his time to do the same, 
where is the same man that sang in my ear that no matter what...
 
I heard something.  I blinked my eyes and looked up.  There was Kevin on 
his knees in front of my chair and he took my hands in his, rubbing his 
thumbs over mine.  He was singing.  
 
No matter what they call us
However they attack
No matter where they take us
We'll find our own way back

I can't deny what I believe
I can't be what I'm not
I know our love's forever
I know no matter what

 
That voice.  God, he sounded like an angel.  All the emotion he was putting
into just sent chills up my spine and made every hair on my body stand at 
attention.  I looked down into his eyes and saw only love there. No anger, 
no surprise, just love.
 
He cupped my face in his hands, "You and Me, Nick.  Against the world if 
we have to. But, I'm not going to turn my back on who I am.  I'm not going 
to give up the best thing in my life.  No matter what."
 
I nodded, "I believe you." I did believe him, with all my heart. God, I 
don't think I could take it if he left again. 
 
He lifted me off the chair and sat down on it himself, resting me on his 
lap and holding me close. "Good.  I know I hurt you, Nick.  But I will 
never willingly leave you again."  
 
I nodded again and rested my head on top of his, "I know, Bumpkin."  In my 
mind though, the thought raged. 'It's not the willingly I'm worried about. 
It's the choice between me and your family.'  I closed my eyes and sighed.  
What would happen if he had to make a choice between his family and me? 
 
I shook my head.  I can't think like this.  Of course Anne is going to freak,
but look how things turned out with my mom.  Maybe we were making too big 
of a deal of this.  Maybe things would be fine.  
 
I stood up and reached my hand out for Kevin, "Ready?"