'This has to be the worst day of my life,' Kevin thought to himself as he sat in the small office, waiting for the doctor that was caring for his bandbrother. He had called Bob and Jane Carter telling them only that Nick couldn't wait to be seen by his doctor in Tampa and that they had rushed him to University of Miami hospital as soon as the plane had landed. Kevin knew that this wasn't telling the Carter's the whole story, but at least it bought him some time until Nick had at least been checked over. In his opinion, this was an appropriate answer until he knew the whole picture.
Decided that sitting on an airplane for the last twelve hours was causing his legs to cramp, Kevin got up to stretch his legs and look at the diplomas that were displayed on a wall above a long leather couch. Just as he leaned closer to read, the door swung open and a short, gray haired man dressed in dark green sugical scrubs entered the room.
"Hello, I'm Dr. Simon," the man said as he offered his hand out.
Kevin reciprocated the doctor's action. "Kevin Richardson."
"Please, have a seat," Dr. Simon said, gesturing toward the set of seats in front of the large, paper cluttered desk. "Are you a relative of Mr. Carter?"
Kevin shrugged his shoulders. "Kinda sorta. We work together and for all intensive purposes, I'm considered to be his older brother and guardian." He paused for a moment before adding, "We sing in a band together."
"I see...."
"The manager is suppose to be the guardian when we are away from Florida and we were overseas touring Europe and the manager wasn't taking the proper care of Nick," Kevin jumped in when he could see that the doctor was starting to become hesitant in disclosing Nick's health information. "Please, you have to tell me what's wrong with my baby brother!"
Either it was Kevin's tone or the expression in the young man's eyes, but Dr. Simon felt he could trust the man that was seated across the desk.
"I'll be blunt with you Mr. Richardson," the older man started. "We have one very lucky young man. It is fortunate for you that you realized the seriousness of Nick's condition. According to the CAT scan that was done after he was admitted to the ED, it appears that he has suffered a small bleed on the brain."
Kevin paled when he heard the doctor's remark.
"Did he receive a sharp blow to the head?"
"I-I told the nurse that he had gotten hurt in Spain when he was rushed by a group of fans."
"Did he get seen by a physican in Spain? I'd like to see the medical records from that---"
"He wasn't seen.......at least by a doctor," Kevin interrupted. "The manager insisted he'd be okay and that we didn't have time to waste and to just keep an eye on him. He was looked over by a nurse at the venue."
Dr. Simon glared at Kevin. "Was he unconscious?"
Kevin took a shaky breath in as he raked a hand through his hair.
"I....I think he had been....he was awake when I saw him.....I..."
"Was he unconscious at any point and time after that injury?"
Kevin swallowed hard before answering. "He has fainted a few times since that time. He started to feel faint in the airport..."
The doctor picked up the phone in his office and at that point, Kevin felt that he had let Nick down. He had always felt that the weight of his younger bandbrother's was on his shoulders. The responsibility he felt for them was unmeasureable.
"Dr. Simon here....I want a MRI of the brain with contrast on patient Carter STAT."
Kevin watched as the doctor leaned back in the leather desk chair, rubbing his right eye as he sighed. After a few moments of silence, Kevin decided to broach the silence.
"Will he be okay?" Kevin knew that this was a stupid question; he had been told that Nick had a bleed on the brain which meant that he had gotten a stroke at some point and time. "I...I mean there won't be any long term damage?"
Instead of immediately answering, the doctor sighed and turned his chair toward the window. It wasn't until he started to turn the chair back, did the older man speak. "I won't be certain until I have a look at the results of the MRI."
Kevin walked numbly back to the private waiting room where Brian, Howie and AJ were waiting. He kept his composure as he walked from the doctor's office, keeping his eyes trained to the floor. The normally unflappable Kevin Richardson didn't cry until he walked into the waiting room. When his eyes met his cousin Brian's eyes, he finally let go.
"Jesus," AJ breathed when he saw the tears stream down the tall man's face.
Howie leaned foward in his seat and cradled his head in his hands as Brian moved to his cousin and placed a comforting arm around his shoulders.
The four men sat in silence for a few minutes. Three of them waiting for Kevin to collect his emotions. AJ and Howie had never seen Kevin upset and this had them worried.
Brian had seen Kevin cry before and that was when his uncle was dying. 'But that was different.....his Uncle Jerald was dying from colon cancer', Brian mentally thought as he rubbed small circles in his cousin's back while Kevin sniffled and wiped the tears from his cheeks occasionally.
"I can't take the silence anymore," AJ sputtered. "What the hell did the doc tell you?"
Brian shot a disapproving look toward the rebel.
AJ chose to ignore the visual threat. "Seriously.....what did he say about Nicky?"
Kevin wiped the tears from his cheeks as he looked up and over at AJ and Howie. He took a deep shaky breath in before he spoke.
"He said that Nick had bleeding on a part of his brain."
"Shit," AJ cursed.
"How bad?" Howie asked.
"Bad enough that he ordered a MRI of the brain after he asked if Nick was unconscious at anytime," Kevin replied and then took a deep breath in and balled his fists and started to pound his thighs. "Shit......shit....shit....SHIT!"
"He'll be fine," Brian encouraged in a soft voice.
Kevin shook his head, ignoring his cousin. "This is all my fault!"
"How can Nick getting hurt be your fault?" Howie challenged.
Kevin stood up and wandered toward the windows. "Because I'm the one that should have been protecting him....I should have stopped him before this happened.....I should have taken him to the hospital back when this happened instead of listening to Lou..."
"Kev, it wasn't your fault, quit blaming yourself," Howie said. "None of us knew that this was going to happen."
"But it happened and I didn't take him to the hospital when he should have went. This could have been taken care of days ago," Kevin cried.
"Let's wait until we find out what the doctor says about the MRI before jumping to conclusions," Brian said. "I mean there has to be a reason why he ordered this."
Kevin raked a hand through his hair. "He told me that he wanted to see how much of the brain was involved and I guess he could tell how bad it is damaged."
"I don't get it....." AJ rasped. "I mean Nicky was okay. I mean he said he was fine."
"You're talking about Nick...he wasn't going to admit to anyone when things were bad and you know it," Brian said.
"Let's just wait and see what the doctor finds out before jumping the gun on how bad things are," Howie added. "Just wait and pray."