Chapter Fifty

Chapter Fifty



"Seriously, Jess, we've got a little over three weeks before I have to start doing rehearsals again. You better make your mind up now where you want to go!" Nick asked as he laid the travel brochures down on the glass coffee table.

Jess glanced at all the brochures Nick had selected. "Busch Gardens? Honestly Nick!"

Nick smiled. "Hey now! I was getting desperate here."

He sat down on the white leather couch next to Jess. "Any place you want to go, I'll go there, just ask."

"Nick, you've been all over the world, certainly there's a place you like the best," Jess argued.

"But I want it to be your choice, not mine," Nick insisted.

"Tell me your most favorite place in the world that you've been to," Jess asked.

Nick leaned back into the couch and thought for a moment. There were so many different places he had seen, each were special in some sort of way. "I guess London, England was pretty sweet."

"Then we'll go there, you know the sites so it will be easier to plan this out," Jess replied as she tossed a brochure of England at Nick.

Just as Jessica placed her hand on the phone to call the travel agent, it began to ring. Nick was starting to tell her to let the machine pick it up, but Jess already picked the receiver up.

"Hello?.....oh, hi Howie!.....what?.......oh my god....no, this can't be true......we're on our way....bye."

Nick could instantly tell it was bad news that Jess had just received from Howie. Her face had gone pale and her voice was trembling after she started talking to Howie. She quietly turned and faced Nick.

"That was Howie," Jess started out. She paused and swallowed hard. Nick searched her face for some type of clue as to the news she was about to deliver. "It's Brian, we need to go to Orlando immediately.

"What's wrong?" Nick asked as he followed Jess out the door into the garage.

Jess stopped and turned to face Nick. "They think he had a stroke."

A stoke.

The words cut through Nick like a knife. "How?"

"Nick, I don't know, we'll find out more when we get there, okay? You want me to drive or are you okay to drive?"

Taking the keys out of her hand, Nick simply stated, "I'm fine."

*~*~*~*~*~*~*


The anguished face of Kevin’s pretty much assured Nick that the situation was not looking very good for Brian. Howie and AJ were sitting in the private waiting room as well, AJ pacing back and forth and Howie looking completely lost.

“How is he?” Jess managed to ask Kevin as she hugged him.

The tears slipped down Kevin’s cheeks and all he could manage was shake his head no.

“Don’t you know anything yet?” Nick yelled out of frustration.

“Nick, calm down, this won’t change matters,” Howie softly spoke, trying to soothe Nick.

“But why? How?” Nick questioned.

“All we know is that Leighanne found Brian on the floor in the kitchen this morning, unconscious. They’re not coming back and telling us anything yet. Leighanne is in with Brian and his parents have been called in,” Howie stated quietly.

“When are they going to come and tell us something?” Nick persisted.

“Nick we’re not family, so I doubt they will talk to us,” Howie replied.

“Yes we are, Brian’s my brother,” Nick argued.

“Not a relative,” AJ snapped.

As Nick was preparing to respond to AJ, a short, blonde haired nurse entered the waiting room.

“Normal hospital policies state only two visitors at a time to a patient’s room, but because of the circumstances, you are all permitted to go to Mr. Littrell’s room. Please follow me,” the nurse stated.

The group followed the nurse down the long, white-tiled hallway. She stood in the doorway to NICU room number 12 and gestured for them to enter.

Nick scanned the room as he walked in. His heart sank when he saw Brian. He laid in the bed, hooked up to machines and had tubes going into his mouth. Leighanne was holding the only hand that didn’t have an IV in it, tears running down her cheeks. When she looked up and their eyes met, Nick immediately started asking questions.

“How did this happen? What’s wrong with him?”

Leighanne took in a deep breath before she answered Nick’s questions.

“Brian had a stroke,” Leighanne replied.

“I know that, but how?” Nick persisted.

“They think it’s from that large clot Brian had from when he had that surgery after the accident. They think part of it broke off and went to his brain,” as Lee answered, her voice was shaking.

“But he’s gonna be okay, right?” Nick hopefully asked.

Leighanne broke down into sobs.

“Lee, he’s gonna be okay, right?” Nick repeated.

Leighanne looked at each of their faces and then at Brian. “Brian’s gone.”

Nick looked at her in disbelief. He could hear the heart monitor keeping a steady beat of Brian’s heart.

“No, he’s not, what are you talking about?” Nick demanded.

“Brian’s brain dead,” Lee replied, no emotion in her voice.

“He can’t be, you’re wrong!” Nick shouted at her.

“They’re waiting for his parents to come so Brian can be taken off of life support,” Leighanne stated, her voice shaky and uneven toned.

“NO!”

Nick suddenly felt sick to his stomach. He wanted to run out of that room. He wanted to find someone that could help Brian, someone that wouldn’t give up on him. He opted to stay where he was, staring at Brian’s lifeless body in that bed.

Nick looked at everyone in the room. “So that’s it? You’re giving up just like that? His heart is still beating, he is alive dammit!”

Jess softly touched Nick’s arm. “That was the strongest part of Brian, Nick. His heart was what made Brian Brian. It would never give up, it just hasn’t been told to quit.

*~*~*~*~*~*


Brian’s parents arrived at the hospital a few hours later. They had signed the necessary paperwork to have Brian removed from life support. They had decided to allow each of the guys a few minutes to be alone with Brian before the life support was terminated.

Nick was the last of them to go into the room. He walked in slowly, looking at the machines, especially the one that kept track of Brian’s heartbeat.

At first, all Nick did was stare at Brian’s face. It appeared to be peaceful. If it weren’t for the tubes in his mouth, Nick could have sworn that Brian had just laid down to take a nap.

Then the memories started to flood Nick’s mind. The first time they met.......all the concert tours they played at.....the practical jokes Brian played on him and the jokes he played on Brian......the basketball games and how often he accused Brian of cheating....Brian’s laugh.....his smile......how he was always there for Nick.

Nick took Brian’s hand into his. Taking a deep breath, Nick finally spoke to him, pouring his heart out.

“Brian,” Nick started, his voice choked with emotion. “I know you’re still here somewhere in this room and you can hear me. You’ve been like a brother to me. You always took my side and defended me from day one. Hell, if you hadn’t done that stupid stunt in trying to save my damn life that night, you would be okay and not laying in this bed waiting to check out. You’ve given your life for me and you will still be giving your life through everything that you will be donating.” Nick chocked back a sob.

“God, Brian, you were so damn perfect. You always said that God only takes the best, but I’m selfish and I want him to leave you here with us, we still need you.”

Nick broke down into heart breaking sobs. He put his head on Brian’s chest and cried. After several minutes had passed, Nick reached out and tried to hug Brian the best he could and kissed his cheek.

“I love you, buddy, I always have. I’m going to miss you.”