I sat in the hospital waiting room, waiting to hear news about my brother. I could hear cries in the back; a child was born. A tear silently fell down my cheek. I hated hospitals, the rooms smelled like rubbing alcohol. I was getting sick. A man walked by me, he smelled like he just came from a bar. A nurse was following him, giving him directions, and my head was spinning. I was lost, then I heard the nurse, her voice calling me"Ms, excuse me," she tried to be brave. I got chills up and down my spine as she spoke. "Yes, I'm sorry," I tried to be confident. "You're brother has just passed away," she told me with such sorrow. I fell to my knees; letting tears run down my face. "No, he can't be, go fix him! You HAVE to!" I was crying, tears streaming down my face, mascara followed; I was hysterical. It wasn't fair. I tried to get up to see my brother; I wanted my last moment with him to be special. "Let me see him please!" I couldn't stop crying I was scared. I wanted my brother back. "This way," the lady nodded as she walked towards the rooms. We passed 115, 117, 119, 121, and she stopped in front of 123. She opened the door I walked in. I saw him lying on the bed, his short brown hair so perfect as always. His eyes shut so I couldn't see his dazzling blue-green eyes that everyone complimented him on. His lips so soft and tender with the hint of the color rose. He could turn any dark room bright with his radiant smile. And now he is gone forever. I sat down beside him and held his hand. I couldn't bear to see him like this. I closed my eyes and tears fell like a waterfall. I remembered Easter and how we spent it together. ::FLASHBACK:: "JC, No that's not fair! No cheating," I cried. I was wearing my off white floral dress. It was Easter; we got together with everyone, grandma, grandpa, aunts, uncles and all of our cousins. JC was about 10 years old I was 5 or so. Every year we played tag with all of our cousins. "No, your cheating Marissa!" he exclaimed. He ran up to me and picked me up, we spun around. I giggled with happiness. ::END OF FLASHBACK:: I opened my eyes and looked at him with sorrow. I wanted him just to hug me and tell me I'd be ok and to hold on. I could hear voices in the hall of excitement; the second child was born. I couldn't bear to listen, my brother was gone. I looked around the cold and bare hospital room and saw his disc man with his favorite CD "Sting." I turned it on, leaving the headphones on the nightstand. I put on number 7, it was his favorite song; "You Were Meant For Me". As I turned up the volume, my tears stopped for a moment. I raised his hand up to my nose to smell him. He always had a distinct smell, it was a sweet scent. I closed my eyes and I inhaled the smell. I remembered my sweet 16. ::FLASHBACK:: "Ok, ladies and gentlemen. It's time for the birthday girl to dance with daddy," the DJ said straight into the microphone. I stood in silence as all eyes were on me. "M, Let's go hit the dance floor." JC said walking up to me holding his hand out. "You look too beautiful not to dance," he reassured me. I was wearing a baby blue dress with spaghetti straps. It went all the way down to the floor, the bottom of the dress covering my high heel shoes. It was a tight dress that fit perfectly. My hair was up with little diamond studs in it. JC had helped me pick out the dress. "M, don't be sad, Dad would be here if he could but he left us," JC whispered in my ear. He placed his hand gently on my hip, while my hand fit perfectly in his. I almost cried, I was so happy. ::END OF FLASHBACK:: I dropped his hand by my side, how could I forget those moments? JC was always there for me. But not just for me, my mom and older sister Heather also. Especially when my father walked out on us. I remember being dumped for the first time in my life. ::FLASHBACK:: The bell rang, school was out. I went to my locker; I was smiling, ready to go home. When Andrew approached me, I remember exactly what he said. "Marissa, we've been together for 3 months I think we'd be better off as JUST friends." I nodded my head, grabbed my backpack, slammed my locker and ran. I remember sitting on the bus, looking out the window crying. The bus came to a stop. I got out of my seat and got off the bus. I walked slowly to my house, which was 3 houses away from the bus stop. When I arrived home, I poured my heart and soul into JC. He looked at me for a moment and LAUGHED. "It's not the end of the world," he told me. I ran upstairs and yelled down to him, "I thought you'd understand! I'll just talk to Heather!" ::END OF FLASHBACK:: I couldn't hold it in, more tears streamed down my face; I didn't know how this was happening to JC! Not JC, he didn't deserve this! I can't understand, it shouldn't have happen to him. I remembered what happen the night he died. ::FLASHBACK:: "JC, can you pick Heather and I up? We're over at Justin's house," I asked him on the phone. It was late, around 2:30 PM. "Yeah, sure," he replied and continued. "I'll be there in a second." He hung up the phone before I could say good-bye. It only takes 5 minutes to get to Justin's house max, and it's already 2:55. Heather and I were getting worried. "Heather, call JC's cell," I shouted from the kitchen getting water. "OK," she replied. She got the phone and dialed his number it rang a good 4 times before someone picked up, but it was a strange man, not JC. "Hello?" the man asked. "Umm, where is JC?" Heather asked pacing back and forth. "Ma'am, is this a relative?" the man asked in a sad tone. "Yes, this is his sister. What happen?" Heather was worried at this moment. "Mr. Joshua Chasez was hit by a drunk driver. It hit the back of the car; the driver of the other car was going 80 MPH, the impact killed him. Your brother went through the windshield, we aren't sure if he is ok," the man tried to explain and continued on. "He was just taken to Emergency Room at Mercy Hospital." Heather fell to the floor, I ran over to her. "Heather what happened? What happened Heather?" I asked her, hugging her tightly. "J...J...C..JC, was in an accident," she cried harder and harder. "He's...he's at...Mercy." I looked at her and froze, I couldn't cry, I just couldn't, was she lying? "Heather you spend the night here, I'm going to the hospital," I told her. I got up and called a cab. ::END OF FLASHBACK:: I remembered everything that happen that night; Heather was so sacred, and I couldn't believe her. I remember arriving at the hospital. ::FLASHBACK:: I ran in the hospital door, rushing to the front desk. My brown hair pulled back in a pony tail, all wet and started to frizz, the water dripping on to my Green, long sleeved Abercrombie and Fitch shirt. Mascara running down the side of my face, my brown eyes all red from crying in the cab, I had just gotten it through my head what had happen. "My brother, JC Chasez, was just in an accident and is in the emergency room," I cried. "Ma'am, your going to have to wait he is in surgery right now," the nurse responded. I sat down and leaned my head back, closing my eyes and praying that he would be ok. I could hear ambulances rushing in from another incident. "Ms. Chasez," the doctor said looking around for me. "Yes!" I stood up quickly and tried to clean my self up. "JC was hit from behind by a drunk driver, he went through the windshield which knocked him out and a piece of glass went through his chest/heart." He looked at me and my eyes filled with tears, he continued. "We are doing everything we can for him. Just sit tight." He patted my shoulder and walked back into emergency room. ::END OF FLASHBACK:: I looked at my brother with a bandage around his chest, and a cut on his lower lip. I tried to think of what to say to him for the last time. "JC, I know you can hear me," I held his hand and continued on. "I want you to know you were the best brother ever. When dad left us you helped us, Mom, Heather and I. I know that you will always be there for me, watching me." I closed my eyes tightly and tried not to cry. "I'm sorry it ended so soon but know you have touched me in a way no other could." I looked over at him and decided how too officially say good-bye. "JC, I love you very much, don't forget that! I want you to know that I'll never forget you. This good-bye won't be forever, I'll see you one day." I stood up and bent over and kissed JC on the cheek. I walked out, letting him be in peace from that moment on. I knew that letting go of a loved one, is one of the hardest things to do in life. ::A MONTH LATER:: "...This is what happens To a man alive, When friends let friends Drink and drive." I read my poem aloud to my whole entire high school, explaining the consequences of drinking and driving. I explained what happened that tragic night my brother died. I never wanted to see one of my peers to go through what I went through. As I looked at their faces, tears formed in their eyes, some even crying. I finished my speech with a simple quote, one to remember. I said to them, "When one does die you must accept and forgive, to love another the way you did."
