"You really surprised me, Sherl," Alex sighed. It was many hours later. The ranting evolved into bittersweet remorse. He assessed me with what I labeled "Puppy dog eyes." "I thought - for a brief moment, before we broke down the door - that you wanted no part of him. I wanted to believe you were waiting for me to find you. Instead, you were in the feathers, giving him pussy."

I closed my eyes. I wanted to shut him out. His image, his words, they returned relentlessly. Even with my back to him, I couldn't block his accusatory stare, nor could I shake the haunting reminder of Howard's battered face. I couldn't distinguish that face with the man I spent almost forty-eight heavenly hours. If I hadn't thrown myself between them, they might have finished him. My conciliatory words alone would have been sufficient to spare him. Alex expected me to discredit him before he granted me forgiveness. I doubted I could be that deceptive.

Alex put his hand on my shoulder, prompting my attention. He certainly hadn't had much of it while babbling. "Was it that difficult for you, being alone with another man? Was the temptation that strong? Did he ask you to have sex with him?"

"No." I spat between clenched teeth. I didn't want his putting a finger on me. At this point, his touch repulsed me.

"What went wrong between us, Sherl? The fucking sure didn't go sour. You always enjoyed it, at least you seemed like you did."

I pulled away from him. A rush of awareness ran through me. I wasn't being entirely fair to Alex. No, he wasn't a truly repugnant individual. I had delighted in submitting to him. The events of several hours ago were beyond my control. The door screaming off its hinges still reverberated in the back of my mind, then what happened to Howard. Those pictures, those sound were pollutants to an otherwise perfect memory.

"I did enjoy the things you and I did," I mentioned faintly. I failed to summon passion in my voice. My statement was utterly deficient of that quality. "They were good. But physical satisfaction doesn't compensate for your wrongdoing. You fleeced Howard's family of their money and didn't register one regret. You have no conscience, Alex. You're a cruel person."

"So," his tone deepened several notches, "I'm the bully, eh? It seems to me you've benefited from this arrangement. Have you forgotten that fabulous wardrobe hanging in your closet, or that luxurious house with the pool? Or perhaps you don't remember those vacations to the Caribbean or Europe? Have the perks slipped your mind?"

"You're not buying my affections," I declared, "not another, single moment of it. I don't care about your gifts. They've lost their meaning, their value. I'm no longer your ornament."

"You can't mean that."

I turned on my heel to face him. "There isn't a shred of emotion left inside me for you other than disgust. Your actions have revolted me."

He surveyed me closely. Those hooded eyes measured me for accuracy. "Are you trying to tell me you're in love with this guy?"

I lowered my gaze.

"After what he did?" Alex bellowed. "Drugging, then holding you for ransom? That set of behaviors you find acceptable?"

I shook my head. "I can't account for the feelings I have for Howard. They resist definition. I realize he used force, but his brand, I can defend. Yours, I cannot."

Alex, his handsome features gnarled, slammed his fist against the wall. The resulting thud failed to shake me. "You stupid bitch. You have no brains."

"Your opinion of me, though immaterial, is likely precise," I said evenly. "At any rate, I have no desire to be with you."

"You're going to walk away from everything I gave you, without a nickel to your name?"

"There's little point in staying. I can't let you touch me after what I know about Howard. It wouldn't be right. There is a limit to the number of allowances a person can make before the weight of his conscience succumbs."

"Where will you go?" he asked, his voice filled with aggravation. "What will you do?"

I shrugged. I'm sure I wasn't giving him the picture he expected to see. Perhaps he concluded in his mind that I would throw myself at his mercy; instead, I insisted upon my freedom. "It doesn't matter. I'd like to think it would be with Howard."

His features darkened. "I can make him vanish. You'd never see him again."

My pulse accelerated. "You mean you'd kill him?"

He sighed. "Not personally. I know a great many people I can pay to carry out that wish."

"Alex," I gasped. "You can't."

My hysteria gave him pleasure. I could see evidence in the corner of his lips. "There's little you can do to alter that decision."

I was nauseated by his sardonic expression. I couldn't lose Howard. Now that he entered my life and I got to know him, I wanted to make him a fixture. I couldn't stand back and let Alex destroy that chance at happiness. If my departure ultimately affected Howard's survival, I would have to bargain.

"What will it take?" I asked. "What am I to pay?"

He grinned. "Need you ask?"

Alex was predictable in his appetite. It was the sole trait in his character that rarely veered into obscurity.

"It's not as though you haven't had it before," he whispered in my ear. "Despite what you've said, I know which hot buttons to press when it comes to stimulating you. You're a very easy woman to read, Sherl."

Strangely, a sudden thrill surged through me. I was surprised it could still exist through that haze of resentment. Alex's hands ran over my body in an expert manner. He did possess the knowledge to provide me pleasure. I might have externally challenged his bed, but internally, it was another story.

My mind tried to stay fixed to those moments of ecstasy Howard furnished, but Alex reinforced his storm of passion with experienced stroking. His fingertips talked to my nerve endings. His gaze ignited passion. I couldn't explain what warranted such a strong outbreak. My body responded to him, in spite of my repeated attempts to countermand those enticing ministrations. Each weep, each fondle accentuated my need to reacquaint myself with the fireworks he was capable of lending.

"You can tell me you don't want it," he murmured, "but you would be lying, Sherl. You haven't forgotten how great it is. You couldn't possibly deceive me. I know what turns you on. I've watched you cum a thousand times."

I sobbed as he accentuated his statement with another sample of his erotic power over me. His tips rippled over my velvety flesh. The strings of my bikini became undone with a twist of those fingers. My breasts expanded, the nipples springing forward. I closed my eyes, disbelieving this could happen. Even when my bottoms were dispatched, my brain was out of focus. I couldn't attach a negative feeling to that smooth touch, nor could I rebel against the storm of lust that overtook me.

He led me to the bed in the room. I made no attempt to resist him. I was devoid of anger. I went through the motions he dictated. I climbed onto the mattress per his silent instruction, without reservations.

Without further explanation, he took my wrist and brought it up high. A gentle breeze that emerged from the opened window made a silk scarf looped around one of the bedposts flap. He slipped the scarf around my wrist and secured it to the bedpost.

"Alex…"

"Shhhh…"

He bound my other wrist with a similar scarf waiting on the opposite bedpost. There was something kinky on his mind. I was afraid to be given a full description. Alex had always been so old-fashioned and strait-laced that this departure from our customary pattern was an unusual respite.

I could scarcely refrain from shaking, feeling him breathing down my back. I heard the rustle of his clothes as they were stripped from his body. A few moments later, his chest fastened to me from behind, causing my shivering to deepen. His thumb tickled at my nipple, driving me insane with desire. I was wet and longing for him to quickly take what he wanted.

"Alex," I managed in a choked plea, "please…"

"You want me, don't you?"

I couldn't lie. "Yes, very much."

He allowed more time to pass before his fingers grazed my buttocks. I trembled at his touch.

Alex was determined to make me beg. "Do you want me as much as Howard?"

My senses faltered. He tormented me, even in the heat of the moment. Howard floated back at me. I had to purge that image if I was to survive this ordeal. "Don't ask me that."

"I must." "Fuck me," I told him. "Fuck that thought out of my head, and yours."

I steered my ass toward him, praying he would do so. My silken bonds prohibited me from moving to far.

I was at the frustrated level when I finally felt him guide himself toward me.

"Yes," I whimpered.

Slowly, he entered. He took a great deal of time entering me, drawing out the sensation inch by inch. It was as though he wanted me to adjust to him. Having sufficiently prolonged my misery, he began pushing and pulling himself into me.

"Ohhh," I moaned. "That's wonderful, Alex, don't stop. I want it to last."

He managed to capture my chin with his hand, then steered me around until his mouth covered mine. He silenced my pleas immediately with his probing tongue, sucking my oxygen. I sobbed inside his mouth, stimulated by the combination of his tongue, his hand on my breast, and his dick.

"More," I whined. "Give it to me."

"Feels so good."

"Yes."

"You're sure of that?" he taunted. "You aren't lying to me, are you, Sherl? You're not pretending you are with Howard, are you?"

"No, please, you must believe me. That's not what I'm thinking."

"Did Howard give you this much pleasure? He taunted.

"Jesus, Alex."

"Did he make you cum?"

I bit my lip. The answer refused to emerge from my throat. Instead, hot pulsations ran through me.

"I want to touch you," I gasped. "Untie me."

"No."

"Please. I can't stand not being to use my hands."

"I want you to concentrate on what I'm doing to you," he said, fucking me. "I don't want you to have any control over what I do. Then I want you to compare it to the things you did with Howard. I want to know which of us is better."

He intended to punish me. "Stop, please stop. I don't want you to keep bringing up Howard."

"Why? Are you starting to feel guilty? Does having me inside you remind you of what you were so willing to abandon?" He fucked me harder, with relentless force. "Admit it baby, he can't satisfy you the way I can. It's not the same with him. I t could never be this good with him."

"Oh, Alex, yes!" I screamed, so full of him. Bearing down on him, forcing as much of him as possible into me. I wished we were in the other direction so that I could see his face taken with ecstasy rather than the sight of his muscled, hairy legs tensing as I pushed myself downward as hard as I could. I knew, however, this position afforded him with maximum pleasure, and his pleasure was extremely important tonight."

In the dark across from me, illuminated by moonlight flooding the room, I saw our reflection in his mirror. I saw the sweat streaming down myself. Ecstasy radiated from my face, and best of all, I could see Alex inside of me.

"Cum with me, baby," he muttered. "Give yourself over to it. I want to make you cum, make you feel how good it is to have me."

I closed my eyes and let him take over. I felt him slipping in and out of me. The intoxicating rush that overwhelmed me earlier, the tingling that always commenced in the pit of my groin and branched to every vessel of my being happened once again. The guttural sigh that started deep in my throat crept upward until my trembling lips heavily pronounced it. Despite my inner agony, I had to respond, was forced to respond to the gratification he gave.

I rocked with him, enjoying the movement of him filling me with each stroke. "Oh, does that feel good!" I rested my hand over his in an attempt to wrestle control over my quivering clit, but Alex was handling it quite nicely.

Alex was gasping behind me. "Are you ready?" he barely managed to say.

Merely hearing him on the verge of climax sent me into the mood. "Yes," I whimpered, gasping at his fevered strokes into me.

"Oh, yes, Alex, now!"

"Uuugggggghhhhhh!" he howled.

We rocked to and fro in the bed as he emptied himself into me while attempting to still my shudder with his strong arms. He of course, was shaking every bit as hard. I was certain I felt him cum.

Finally, we collapsed into an expended embrace.