Alex's Idiocy Test

(12/20/99)

Welcome to the Idiocy Test. Just answer these simple questions. If the answer is yes, click on the check box so that a checkmark or x appears. If the answer is no, leave the check box blank. At the end, click on the button to see how idiotic you are. In case you're wondering, I'm about 13.3% idiotic.

Don't do the things on this test. They are stupid things. That's why they're on this test. Stupidity is not good.

1. Have you ever had your tongue frozen to a piece of metal?
2. Have you ever had your tongue frozen to a piece of metal in the middle of summer?
3. Have you ever been a member of the Pen 15 club?
4. Do you think Homer Simpson is a good father?
5. Have you ever made someone stop believing that there's no such thing as a stupid question?
6. Have you eaten dirt in the last three months?
7. Is there a "Kick-me" sign on your back?
8. Have you ever forgotten your name?
9. Have you ever bought trick gum (e.g. the fart-flavoured stuff) for yourself?
10. Do you regularly ask questions that just got answered a few seconds ago?
11. Have you ever cheated on a test with a cheat sheet with all the wrong answers?
12. Have you ever failed a class at school?
13. Have you ever failed a grade at school?
14. Do you think the main characters in "Dumb and Dumber" were just as smart as you?
15. Have you ever followed someone across a large country to return a briefcase to someone you didn't even know?
16. Have you ever locked yourself out of your own hotel room?
17. Have you ever locked yourself out of your own hotel room while naked?
18. Have you ever had a turkey stuck on your head?
19. Have you ever paid $2 (or more) for a can (or less) of warm pop?
20. Did you invest in Bre-X?
21. Do you ever talk to plants or animals?
22. Do the plants and animals (talking birds excluded) talk to you?
23. Are you a politician?
24. Did I spell potatoe correctly?
25. Do you think Toronto is the capital of Canada?
26. Have you ever locked the keys in your car?
27. Have you ever pulled a fire alarm because you thought it was a light switch?
28. Have you ever taken advice from a Calgarian?
29. Did you have trouble understanding any of these questions? (If so, e-mail me using the feedback link below, and I will try to fix it.)
30. Do you have any stories about stupid things you've done that you'd like to share with me? (If so, e-mail me using the feedback link below, and I may turn your story into a question on this test.)

This quiz was inspired by things I've done, things people I know have done, the Sanity Test, the Nerdity Test, Mr. Bean, Dumb and Dumber, and many other people and things.

Use my feedback form to e-mail comments to me:

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