Avoiding Reality! Avoiding reality! Lots of people do it, every day, with all sorts of
means to do so: habits, whether drinking beer, smoking a cig-a-minute, or
any other such "habit"; how about "Walkman radios" - going around wearing
those earsets, listening to your Walkman all the time - that sure avoids
reality (and may even get one injured or more, if one does not also look
where one is going or what one is doing. But, on the other hand, as we all
know, when one is wearing a Walkman one is NOT doing anything anyway!); all
right, how about "talking sports"? Yeah! Get any two or more people
together, who have the urge, the "need", to interact with others, and yet
ARE AFRAID TO DO SO (FEAR! Of the "personal" - the Who and What of a person!
Do you "know" Who or What the person whom you are dealing with/talking to
REALLY "IS" - as a PERSON? NO! Very few of us can truthfully wear those NO
FEAR! (gear) T-shirts, and really MEAN IT!) So sports - ANY and everything,
to do with sports, does enable us to avoid the reality of "knowing" someone
- PERSONALLY! Sports provides a means of "superficial communications" with
another human being...HEY! I can get all "excited", talking about the game,
about the horses, about how many deer we shot today, about how many laps we
put in on the track or in the pool, or ANY kind of sport, participatory OR
NOT (including indoor "sports", such as "working out" at a gym - a wonderful
way of avoiding reality! Of course, I'm going to EXCLUDE the "natural"
indoor sports, such as any form of sex, which is certainly NOT avoiding
reality, but is "indulging" IN reality, as well as being the only natural
way of maintaining one's health and natural vitality. OK, so I'm partial to
sex - But, hey, as Christ has pronounced, "Sexual activity is not only
necessary for reproduction, but is also necessary for the health of the
human species." {the Sacred Histories of Humanity, 7.394.111.791.37}), and
then REALLY "get to know" another person, via the means and commonality of
"sports"... Well, if that is what you think, you are, unfortunately, just
another deluded person (as many psychiatrists themselves are, being "sports"
fans themselves many times). Comparing team or player batting averages MIGHT
sharpen your skills for CPA work and such, but in no way is it going to
enable you to "get inside" another person - to KNOW Who and What a person
really IS, as well as to even remotely CARE ABOUT another person. Oh sure,
the "good ole boys(or girls)" networks provide a wonderful means of, and to,
"sharing an experience ", with another person, whether it is a sewing
circle, drag racing (Hey! Remember the "Azusa Knitting Circle, Literary
Guild, Fishing and Timing Association", a Southern California hot-rodder's
club?), business networking, singles clubs, or just drinking beer and
bar-hopping, and so on. But such experiences are actually "cop-outs" on
reality, because even though one is "sharing an experience" with another
person, the "experience" being shared is itself a means of avoiding reality,
so such a situation is a double-means of avoiding the reality of truly,
honestly, sincerely and actually COMING TO TRUST, and to KNOW, another human
being, as to Who and What that person IS, AS a human being and as a
person. Okay, before I go on here, I'm going to interject one more
category...well, maybe two categories, and maybe more, because these two
are, or can be, sort of "all-inclusive", in relation to the "genre". The
categories ARE: Cowboys, and Country-Western music! Oh, Yes, it is
tear-jerking, emotional, boozing, sad and much more - the music, that is,
BECAUSE the human subconscious KNOWS what the person is REALLY avoiding -
the REALITY of an intimate, caring, mutually-supportive relationship. The
booze, the "broads", the sports, the "boys", and all the "macho" activities
- ALL avoid the reality of a truly loving, caring relationship. The
accoutrements, the symbology (cowboy hats, boots, duds, etc.), the "girlie"
posters, the "macho" talk, the nights out with the boys, the embellishments,
of one's possessions, environs (living space, office, etc.) and life, with
do-dads, souvenirs, "knick-knacks" and all kinds of "memorabilia", of what
"was" (for an instant) or what might have been - ARE ALL "substitutions",
replacements, for the reality of what one's life COULD BE - IF one was NOT
AFRAID, did not have the fear OF, a "relationship", with a significant
"other", with relatives, friends, society, OTHERS. And so one avoids
reality. BUT HEY, let's put this in perspective - rather, in context. (And I need
to do so, because I certainly DO love County music, so I intend to give it
equal space here, and let it defend itself!) First of all, Country music
DOES "open" one's "flood-gates", of emotion and much more, which is all well
and good WHEN one KNOWS Who and What one "is"! The previous comments,
referring to a person avoiding reality, do refer to one who does NOT "know"
Who and What they are, and are thusly merely using Country music - actually,
such does apply to ANY kind of music, whether Rap, Classical, Blues, etc.,
etc. - AS A "crutch", a means of having society, culture, others - ANYONE
BUT THEMSELVES - "tell" that person "Who and What" they are (or are
"supposed" to be). Thusly, we find people, who are still seeking to "find"
themselves, using the instumentality of Country music or ANY music, as a
means of avoiding the work and effort of really "finding" oneself, but
letting others "tell" one What to Do, Say and Think. Oh, the trauma, pains,
trials and tribulations of humanity. Well, that's what Country music is
about! Whether you know yourself or not, we (humanity) will always have
such, and music will always be both a "crutch" and a means of letting one's
emotions flow free and healthfully, as needed. ANYWAY, 'nuf said about that
- on to the rest of this sermon. Okay, we have "feedback" on a number of my previous comments, with regard
to two issues: trust and bonding. First, trust. Yes, if I can't TRUST my
"buddies", my fellow team-mates, to "be", or to do, what they are supposed
to "be/do", there is no way that we can function as a team, whether it is
on-the-playingfield, on-the-battlefield, in the boardroom, or in the mere
functioning of one's job, business, career, etc. BUT, that IS NOT TRUST -
that is merely the "programming" that is necessary, the ACTIONS needed, the
WORDS said, the DEEDS performed, in order for you and your "team" to do that
which is to be done. (And do NOT mistake such "programmed" words, actions
and deeds as RESPONSIBILITY. It is NOT!) Again, such "trust" is merely
another way of avoiding the reality of really knowing others. Okay, next - bonding. Now surely, one might say, when two people have
"bonded" with each other, then we can definitely say that they "know" each
other, and that they are not avoiding reality in their relationship - right?
NOPE! The same criteria applies, no matter what the situation - and that
criteria IS: the "knowing", and appreciation OF, one's SOUL - the Who and
What, of just what it is that makes one "tick"...HONESTLY and truly,
becoming "connected with" that Soul, and "bonding" WITH the very existence,
purpose and reason FOR that Soul's existence...THAT IS REALITY! NOW, we go one step further. The actions, the words, the deeds OF those
two people, together (Remember the spiritual definition of Activism? Look it
up in the dictionary!) - DO MAKE that "union" whole and complete AND JUST!
And that is the "kicker", right there - JUST! Hey, like Bonnie and Clyde, or
any number of such "bonded" pairs throughout history, were, like, "bonded",
BUT, they were committing anti-social "acts", or even anti-human "acts" -
so, can we say, in all REALITY, that when they were killing people, they
were NOT "avoiding reality"? OR, that they really even did "know" each
other, and were not just "using" each other, for their own sick,
psycho-social "purposes"? (Actually, I haven't finished this Sermon yet.
Look for more concluding summation, coming soon!) Aum, Peace, Amen! Father Jerome.
Reply to: fatherjeromeusa@fiwd.org
