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Once upon a time, there lived a woman
who had a maddening passion for baked
beans. She loved them but,unfortunately,
they had always had a very embarrassing
and somewhat lively reaction to her.Then
one day she met a guy and fell in love.
When it became apparent that they would
marry she thought to herself, "He is
such a sweet and gentle man, he would
never go for this carrying on." So she
made the supreme sacrifice and gave up
beans.
Some months later her car broke down on
the way home from work. Since she lived
in the country she called her husband
and told him that she would be late
because she had to walk home. On her
way, she passed a small diner and the
odor of the baked beans was more than
she could stand. Since she still had
miles to walk, she figured that she
would walk off any ill effects by the
time she reached home. So, she stopped
at the diner and before she knew it, she
had consumed three large orders of baked
beans. All the way home, she
putt-putted. And upon arriving home she
felt reasonably sure she could control
it.
Her husband was very excited to see her
and exclaimed, "Darling, I have a
surprise for dinner tonight." He then
blindfolded her and led her to her chair
at the table. She seated herself and
just as he was about to remove the
blindfold from his wife, the telephone
rang. He made her promise not to peek
while he answered the phone.
The baked beans she had consumed were
still affecting her and the pressure was
becoming almost unbearable, so while her
husband was out of the room she seized
the opportunity, shifted her weight to
one leg and let it go. It was not only
loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer
truck running over a skunk in front of a
pulpwood mill. She took her napkin and
fanned the air around her vigorously.
Then, she shifted to the other cheek and
ripped three more. She continued farting
and fanning until she heard the phone
conversation coming to an end.
She placed her napkin back on her lap
and folded her hands upon it. She was
the picture of innocence when her
husband returned, he asked if she had
peeked and she nodded her head no in
response. Her husband stepped forward
and removed the blindfold.
There were 12 dinner guests seated
around the table, there to wish her a
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!! SURPRISE!!!!!
SURPRISE!!!!! SURPRISE!!!!!
