More about yours truely!

Okay, what didn't I mention on my homepage??
I, probably like you, am struggling and wadding through life. I sometimes hate to admit it... but I feel like I'm trapped inside my body. Like, I have all this knowledge, yet, somehow, I'm not quite sure how I have it all! A lot of people underestimate me. They feel like, I shouldn't have the knowledge that I have... mentally, emotionally, physically, etc. I really retain stuff... so if you don't want me knowing, don't tell me.

The things in life that bring me joy are... God, my family, my dogs/pets, my friends, my job, school, and LIFE! I try and live life to the fullest. I think, that's one of the main reasons I'd never commit suicide.

Yes, I have thought about killing myself. If you ever need to talk to someone, e-mail me, I'll talk to you, listen to you, help you in any way I can. I've also thought about running away. Actually, I did, and then had a guilt trip, and came back. God has SO much more in store for me.

I will do almost anything for anyone. If you're dying on the street... I'll be that person to pick you up, and help you get back on your feet. If you need money, I'll lend or give it to you. If you need a listening ear, I'll give it to you. If you need advice, that I give freely. :o) Now it sounds like I'm totally *easy*, and that I'm a *pushover*... I'm not. I have that gift of being able to usually tell what people are after... and I won't do things if you're trying to manipulate me. I'm nice, but I sure ain't easy. :o)
But if you're looking for someone just to talk to, I'm always here. 24/7... anytime, anywhere. I'll talk and listen.

I love hanging out with my friends. If not that, I really like to be on the computer... e-mailing, working on my website (when a terrific thought has hit me), etc. ... working on my scrapbook, and looking @ pictures that I've taken. :o) I'm into my camera... I love to take pictures of people, and I admit, I like being in front of the camera too. I love stretching my abilities, and seeing what creative thing I can do with my photos. I'll take pictures of almost anything... but my favorite subjects are people. They're so interesting! I love being able to capture that one moment in time... the emotion of it. If I can express what that person was feeling, or what was happening @ that moment... that's the best feeling. I like my picture to speak volumes, w/out uttering a word.
I like to just sit down, and watch the world go by. People are always in a rush. I like to sit down, and just watch. I'm what people call and observer, or a watcher. I like to make up stories about what people are in a hurry to do.
When I'm in the mood, I like to sketch. I sometimes sketch to ease anger or frustration. The results are the best. :o)
Once I learn, I'll probably be playing the guitar 24/7. When I'm in the worst of moods, or totally stressed... I pop in a guitar tape. That can relax me in an instant. I gotta admit, if you play guitar... you've got me admiring you already. :o) Guitar music has to be one of the most soothing sounds that God has created. And I plan to learn, this year. :o) Keep me accountable people.
I love to cook and bake also. I could stand being in a kitchen for hours on end... just making things. I love to invent new dishes. Just see what I have, and go from there. And yes, they are edible... and I haven't killed anyone yet. :o)
I also making someone happy... whether that means getting or giving someone something... or telling the most hilarious joke, or having an inside joke, or just making them smile and brightening their day... I think that's just the greatest thing. I find joy in other people's happiness. :o)

I have like, the most awesome friends. I have kept friends since... oh. Well, let's just say that, the majority of my friends, I've kept since day one. I have friends from kindergarten, preschool, junior high, high school, college, work, whatever. And I try and keep touch with most of them. I love my friends to death. I would do ANYTHING for any of them. I stop and literally drop what I'm doing to do something for friends.

My two best friends and I have been friends since... about freshman year. I know it hasn't been THAT long... but I feel we've known each other forever! Sarah and Nicole knew each other before they met me... but now they're closer, and there's me... we sometimes call ourselves the *three musketeers*. :o) You can see pics of us three here.
We met at during our homeschool biology class with Mrs. Sutton. Towards the end of the school year we got closer, and I started going to a Bible study that Sarah had at her house. And then the Bible study moved to our church, Sierra Madre. Sarah, Nicole and I would hang out, or go places together... and our friendship grew. Now we're best friends... and plan to be @ each other's weddings, and to be *aunts* to our kids. I love those girls so much! They are the sisters I don't have. :o)
Sarah is one of the sweetest people I know. When she has kids, I'm sure she'll be like, the best mom. She has a great patience. :o) She's also a lot of fun. I like to hang out with her... and we tease each other back and forth. I can't be mad at her. Sarah has also written little notes of encouragement to me in the mail... that's like the best thing! It's usually when I need it too. :o)
Nicole is like the sunshine. She can brighten my day. And she isn't afraid to give me a lecture/scolding when I need it. If I've done something bad, she won't back down... she'll confront me on it. And I know I need it. Nicole is kind of like my little Jiminey (sp?) Cricket. :o)
They both keep me on the right path, and will help me up when I fall. I trust both of them with any secrets I may have, and I trust them with my life.
They are my kindred spirits, and my bosom buddies (Anne of Green Gables *wink*). I don't know what I'd do without either one of them.

For me, a great way to spend time with friends is just going to the local coffee shop (Beantown) and just kickin' it. Catching up on lives, talking about whatever comes to mind, and having a quiet (or not so quiet *L*) evening.
I don't go to a lot of movies... the last time I went and saw one in the theaters, it was the beginning of last summer! *L* Personally, I'd rather spend that some two hours getting to know my friends better.. than to fill my mind with stuff I really don't need to know about. Or so I figure. :o)
I don't rave, and we don't have wild parties. I guess... as one of my friends at work said, I'm somewhat 'sophisticated'. *L* I like to have fun... but he was right on when he thought I like to hang out at coffee shops. I'd rather talk to people than get drunk and party. I don't need drugs and alcohol to have fun! I'm crazy enough.... hey, caffine is good too. :o)
Don't get me wrong... I like to party... but I'm not 'that' wild. It's hard to explain!

People say that I'm outgoing. I think it all started in my sophmore year. I had been homeschooled since I was in grade 2. I took a biology class for my freshman year... and then I took another bio class in my sophmore year. It was for homeschoolers, put on by a homeschool mom... bless dear Mrs. Sutton (she is SO sweet!). NEwayz... I was friends with the entire class... while, most of the people would just talk to their table. I don't know how it happened, or whatall... but then, I got my job at Old Navy, and I'm even more outgoing than before! I say hi to people (sometimes it's bad, because I tend to scare them... because no one is friendly around here!!!), I smile almost all the time (my friends say I smile too much, and when I don't smile, they think something's wrong), I'll talk to anyone, and can carry on a conversation w/just about anyone... and I'm quite friendly with just about anyone. It's odd. Seriously!
Ya'all should have seen me @ Urbana... I was saying hi to people left and right. But then, it was okay... when you're with 20,000 other Christians, it's alright to go up to someone and just introduce yourself. But I'm back... and I have to keep reminding myself that everyone isn't a Christian, and they aren't all going to react with niceness if I say hi to them. *L*

I'm told I'm bossy. I think that comes from being an only child for about four years... and then being the oldest. :o) I have that dominant, older sibling trait. *L* I'm a leader... but I'm not quite sure if that's good or not! A lot of my friends tend to be the older siblings, or the younger ones. Odd? I thought so.

I like things to be in order... but looking @ my room, you probably wouldn't be able to tell that. *L* When I'm working, or doing something, once I'm done with it, it has to be back in place. Getting out of order tends to freak me out somehow.

I seriously don't date. I've never been on an *official* date in my life! I don't believe in not dating... but then, I don't believe in dating just to date. If you're going to be out looking for a relationship, you aren't going to find it... you have to let the relationship find you. :o)
Yes, I was just in a relationship... but we've mutually decided that we both aren't right for each other. It was good while it lasted though... and I'm glad that we didn't drag it out longer than we did. We enjoyed each other's company, but it was time to move on.... and now I've moved on to this GREAT guy... ya'all may have heard of him, he is SO great! His name? God... yup, thought you may have heard of him. :o) He's one of the best guys you'll ever have. He'll never leave you... he seeks you out to talk to YOU... even out of a large crowd. He'll stick by you when you're in a major crisis situation. He won't run away when you get into trouble... and He'll carry you when you're burdened. How awesome is that?
I seriously think that being friends first has got to be one of the key aspects in making a good relationship. It helps to build a solid foundation for your relationship. Okay, so I admit it isn't the same for all people... but I'd really like to have a friend, have him become a good friend, a confidant, and then, slowly move into more than that. Have it be... you just know. I want to end up marrying my best friend.. not some guy I like.
Just for your information, I have a lot of opinions on relationships, e-mail me if you want to discuss this further

Personally, I don't see why guys get all nervous when they ask girls out. Why can't people just be friends, and then work up to just 'hanging out'?? It would cut down on all the nail biting before he actually makes the call. Right? Like I said before, you can't go looking for a relationship, you have to have it find you. :o)

Ooo! You know what I absolutely cannot stand? At school, when some random guy walks up to me, and asks to take me out, or asks me if he can call me, or get my number... or something along those lines... HELLO! No. You're just asking based on looks alone. What's up with that? Make friends, get a life, then get back to me. It just really rubs me the wrong way when people do that. How lame is that? It's REALLY pathetic. Yeah.

I need to go to bed, I'll finish this another day :o)