Quotes, April 2001
01. Efficiency is intelligent laziness.
- David Dunham
02. He that always gives way to others will end in having no principles of his own.
- Aesop
03. Spare no expense to make everything as economical as possible.
- Samuel Goldwyn
04. Gedenke zu leben
[Remember to live]
- Goethe
05. "If you drive a car, I'll tax the street,
If you try to sit, I'll tax your seat.
If you get too cold I'll tax the heat,
If you take a walk, I'll tax your feet.
Don't ask me what I want it for
If you don't want to pay some more'
'Cause I'm the taxman, yeah, I'm the taxman"
- The Beatles
06. Never insult an alligator until after you have crossed the river.
- Cordel Hull
07. Get your facts first and then you can distort them as much as you wish.
- Mark Twain
08. I have recently been examining all the known superstitions of the world, and do not find in our particular superstition (Christianity) one redeeming feature. They are all alike founded on fables and mythology.
- Thomas Jefferson
09. I don't believe in an afterlife, so I don't have to spend my whole life fearing hell, or fearing heaven even more. For whatever the tortures of hell, I think the boredom of heaven would be even worse.
- Isaac Asimov
10. Eskimo: "If I did not know about God and sin, would I go to hell?"
Priest: "No, not if you did not know."
Eskimo: "Then why did you tell me?"
- Annie Dillard, "Pilgrim at Tinker Creek"
11. Anyone who can worship a trinity and insist that his religion is a monotheism can believe anything... just give him time to rationalize it.
- Robert A. Heinlein
12. I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a guy nailed to two pieces of wood.
- George Carlin
13. I almost shudder at the thought of alluding to the most fatal example of the abuses of grief which the history of mankind has preserved--the Cross. Consider what calamities that engine of grief has produced!
- John Adams
14. John 3:16 - For God so loved the world that he temporarily died to save it from himself. But none of that really matters because most people will be tortured for eternity anyways.
- Matt Miller
15. Once again decent citizens will be able to enter this house of worship, kneel down in front of a nearly-naked man hanging from a wooden apparatus by a series of gruesome body piercings, and engage in their bizarre practices of ritualized blood-drinking and cannibalism without being assaulted by graphic images of attractive young women with bare breasts.
- A. Whitney Brown
16. A long and wicked life followed by five minutes of perfect grace gets you into Heaven. An equally long life of decent living and good works followed by one outburst of taking the name of the lord in vain - then have a heart attack at that moment and be damned for eternity. Is that the system?
- Robert Heinlein
17. Don't burn your bridges until you have crossed them.
- Unknown
18. We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
- Oscar Wilde
19. "Hate is baggage, life's too short to be pissed off all the time, it's just not worth it."
- Edward Norton in "American History X"
20. Moderation has been called a virtue to limit the ambition of great men, and to
console undistinguished people for their want of fortune and their lack of merit.
- La Rochefoucauld
21. The Golden Rule: whoever has the gold makes the rules.
- Unknown
22. Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.
- Ambrose Bierce
23. I have lost friends, some by death, others through sheer inability to cross the street.
- Virginia Woolf
24. Never tell people how to do things. Tell them what to do, and they will surprise you with their ingenuity.
- General George Patton
25. Philosophers have merely interpreted the world. The point is to change it.
- Karl Marx
26. You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.
- Dale Carnegie
27. I find that a great part of the information I have was acquired by looking up something and finding something else on the way.
- Franklin P. Adams
28. The only way round is through.
- Robert Frost
29. I do not want people to be agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them.
- Jane Austen
30. The relationship between truth and a newspaper is like the relationship between the color green and the number seven. Occasionally you will see the number seven written in green, but you learn not to expect this.
- Garrison Keillor
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