Quotes, November 2001
01. In the space age the most important space is between the ears.
- Thomas Barlow
02. I drink to make people interesting.
- Groucho Marx
03. A dog is cheaper than a wife - it eats less and it has already got a fur.
- Unknown
04. The only difference between a cult and a religion is the amount of real estate they own.
- Frank Zappa
05. Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
- Dave Barry
06. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.
- Dave Barry
07. Life is anything that dies when you stomp on it.
- Dave Barry
08. Never lick a steak knife.
- Dave Barry
09. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age 11.
- Dave Barry
10. Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
- Dave Barry
11. And when God, who created the entire universe with all of its glories, decides to deliver a message to humanity, He WILL NOT use, as His messenger, a person on cable TV with a bad hairstyle.
- Dave Barry
12. When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.
- Woody Allen
13. Programming is like sex. One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
- Michael Sinz
14. Most of the trouble in the world is caused by people wanting to be important.
- T.S. Eliot
15. Les envieux mourront, mais non jamais l'envie
[The envious die, but envy never does]
- Molière
16. There are two kinds of men who never amount to very much: Those who cannot do what they are told, and those who can do nothing else.
- Cyrus H.K. Curtis
17. Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen.
- Albert Einstein
18. In science, "fact" can only mean "confirmed to such a degree that it would be perverse to withhold provisional assent." I suppose that apples might start to rise tomorrow, but the possibility does not merit equal time in physics classrooms.
- Stephen J. Gould
19. In spite of everything I still believe that people are really good at heart.
- Anne Frank
20. All men are equal; it is not birth, but virtue alone, that makes the difference.
- Voltaire
21. Culture is the passion for sweetness and light, and what is more, the passion for making them prevail.
- Matthew Arnold
22. Hell hath no fury like a bureaucrat scorned.
- Milton Friedman
23. I love my work. I could sit and watch it all day.
- Unknown
24. Too much of a good thing is wonderful.
- Mae West
25. Moral indignation - jealousy with a halo.
- H.G. Wells
26. The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself.
- Friedrich Nietzsche
27. Every nation ridicules other nations - and all are right.
- Arthur Schopenhauer
28. Love is blind; friendship closes its eyes.
- Unknown
29. Behind every successful man is a woman. And behind her, his wife.
- Unknown
30. The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get to the office.
- Robert Frost
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