What ever happend to being fair?
Doesn't anybody ever care?
Where did my happiness go?
Truthfully, I really don't know.
It all seems to have disapeared,
Just as I have always feared.
I've never known sadness like this.
The happiness that I had taken for granted, I miss.
Suddenly all the colors have turned grey,
All are the same, yet as different as night and day.
Nobody seems to hear what I say,
They just turn and look the other way.
Maybe it's cause I'm not speaking,
But the happiness is slowly leaking.
The sadness has over come my life now,
And I look back..and wonder how.
Where did I go wrong?
What's making my life so painfully long?
Why am I so sad?
And why am I always so mad?
The answers excape me,
And I'm still feeling lonely.
How can I get this to end?
All I really need is a friend..
But there's nobody to really turn to.
It's really something I have to do..
Nobody can do it for me,
Even though I long constantly.
Just to have someone completely there,
Somebody that will always be there.
Somebody that can handle what is happening,
And won't run when it's just beginning.
Who can truly comfort me,
And hold me when I'm lonely.
Some one who could take over who I am,
And change it all, 'cause right now I don't give a damn.
There's only one thing I'd hold onto.
A person that I will always hold true.
He is the one that I truly love,
And inspite of everything, is all I think of.
But nobody knows this just the same,
They think he'll leave as easily as he came.
But both him and I know that's not true.
Because he's what adds color to make my sky blue.
But unfortunatly, he's not the one that can take this away,
Because someone else got in the way.
She was there before me,
He gave her what should belong to me.
And now she's not even around,
Never was anywhere but she is who he found.
He found her first, and fell in love.
Putting her before me, beyond and above.
He gave her what makes him his own,
But they were still all alone.
They never met face to face,
But I guess it didn't matter in this case.
They fell in love anyway,
But their relationship didn't stay.
Now he has me he can love,
But there's always her he's thinking of.
So he can never take my place.
Never can help me with challenges I face.
Things that only a few people can do,
When he was her first love, and she was his too.
Because then they share part of their soul,
Never to be shared again as a whole.
For a piece is missing forever,
Given to the first love, or maybe never.
In this case it's true.
There's nothing he can do.
So I'm still here,
With a soul that's missing a piece here.
A piece I gave to him a while ago,
Gave with everything, from head to toe.
In the mean time, no one knows,
Of the hurt and sadness that grows.
I could tell them time and time again,
But it's only the soul mate that can help, so until then...
©Mandielynn 12/2/98
