Chapter 21

"I said, How'd you get this number?!"

"AJ, come on, that doesn't matter."

Getting pissed very quickly, "Yes it does. You have no business calling here. No right whatsoever."

"AJ, it's your father. Your old man. I can't even call you now?"

"That's funny, I always thought a father was someone who was there for you. Someone who loved you unconditionally...NOT someone who left!"

"AJ, I'm trying. Give me a break. How are we supposed to be on good terms, if you won't even speak with me."

"Well, I dunno...YOU should have thought of that BEFORE you left me and Mom."

"AJ, I've tried to explain...I...."

"Save it. I don't wanna hear it anymore. Don't you EVER call here again. And you better leave Anna out of this, you got that. If I find out that you call her when I'm not around...just forget it!"

"AJ, I want to be your Dad again.

"Well, damn...I don't want to be YOUR son anymore!" he roared, slamming the phone down hard, releasing all the anger and hurt that welled inside of him.

Anna went to his side, and put her arms around him in comfort. She whispered, "Aww, baby, it'll be okay. He can't hurt you anymore."

"Oh Anna, but he can. Everytime he calls me, everytime he tries to make it all better...he hurts me. He makes me so mad, but then when i tell him to get the hell away, I feel so awful, so empty. Like i'm not trying to make the situation any better. But I'm not setting myself up again to be hurt. No more sleepless nights spent wondering when daddy's coming home. No more. I promised myself that when i saw the look of hurt in my mother's eyes, when he told my mother he was gone for good. No more."

He buried his head in Anna's shoulders. Her arms around him calmed him some, at least they took away some of the anger. "Oh Anna, why did he have to call tonight? Why now, just when I started to forget him, forget his voice, forget when he says he's my dad. Never. Dad's aren't like that, he always does this to me. He throws it in my face, reminds me what kind of a father I will NEVER be."

She kissed him lightly on the forehead, "No baby, not you. You're not your father. You're you, and you wouldn't ever dare do what he did to you and your mom. I promise you that, you will never be him...ever."

***At Sel's Place***

Selena moved away in fear. She had never seen Howie so mad, so violent. Not her Howie. Now she stared at him as his fist made a fierce contact with Eric's nose. Eric shoot away, grabbing his nose in pain. Howie took his fist in his hand, rubbing the sore spot.

"Damn that felt good!" he shouted, almost not believing those words had just left his lips.

Staring down at the infuriated Eric, "So how'd that feel? I'm sure it wasn't bad enough. I'm sure it was nothing compared to the pain I felt when I saw you and Selena liplocked on her couch, only hours after we had a fight."

"Well Howie, I didn't think you had it in you."

"Yeah well neither did I, but I dunno...you just seem to bring out the worst in people."

Deciding he'd wasted enough time on Eric, he turned to Sel. "What's going on Sel. I know we were on the outs this afternoon, but I didn't think you'd have the nerve to run to HIM. Run to the man that almost kept us apart last time. How could you run to the man who called himslef my best friend, and then tried to keep us apart all those months ago. My best friend, that's good...the man that tried to steal my woman. Now he's gone and done it again. That's something I'd expect from him. But, damn Sel, I thought I knew you better than that."

Pleading she explained, "Howie, it wasn't like I planned it. I needed someone to turn too, and Eric's always been a friend to me...so I called him."

"Well Sel, I was hoping you'd turn to me. I actually called you earlier to work this out because i wasn't going to lose you. Well, at least that's what I thought. But then I call here, and I hear his voice on your phone. I didn't know what to expect when i got over here, but never...never...did I expect to find you and HIM kissing!" Howie was getting madder by the second, his hurt and fear of losing her overpowering him.

Tears streaming down her pretty Spanish face, "Oh Howie, I didn't mean for this to happen."

Eric got up, defending himself, "Howie, Sel doesn't have to answer to you. As far as I'm concerned, the second she stormed away from you on that beach...that's the second she stopped loving you!"

Ignoring the jerk he had once thought was a friend, "Well ya know Eric, no one asked YOU!"

Selena was know completely covered in tears, her head spinning.

"Sel, you say you didn't mean for this to happen...but it did. And you let it."

Unable to speak she stood there, afraid of losing a man that she loved. A man that was standing right in front of her, but yet, seemed so far away.

"Tell me Sel...Who Do You Love?"

***Back at Brian and Nick's apartment***

Brian walked out of the bathroom, he walked past Nick's room. He noticed the light was still on. He opened the door slightly to find Nick holding a picture of Liz and him in one hand, and Melanie and him in the other.

"Whatcha doing man?" Brian asked, kinda sleepy.

"Oh nothing. i'm just looking at some pictures." Gesturing to the one in his right hand, "Look, this was took of me and Liz on our one year anniversary. We were so happy then...Brian, where did we go from there?"

"I dunno man, but soon after that, you seemed so miserable with her. Its like you lost interest or something."

"Yeah, but I can't believe I forgot that our anniversary was so soon."

"Well, Nick, that's understandable. You're with Melanie now. No one expects you to remember your ex's anniversary. Now if you forgot Mel's, than I'd say you'd have some problems...ya a lot of nights spent alone buddy if you forgot that one." he said chuckling.

"Oh Bri, shut up..we just started dating."

"True, but come on, you can't tell me you haven't thought about what it would be like to be with her."

Blushing, "No, I guess i can't say i haven't. But you can just keep that to yourself."

Grabbing the photo from his left hand, "Yeah Nick, this definitely looks like the face of a man who's in love."

"Brian that picture was taken when we weren't even dating."

"And yet you still kept it by your bedside at night. You seemed awfully attached to a girl you didn't have romantic feelings for. Admit it man, You've had her on your mind for some time now."

"I guess I have man."

"See, I knew it!" Bri shouted with victory as he got up and walked to the door.

"Not so fast B, you can't tell me you haven't had a certain someone on your mind too."

Thinking for a sec, seeing Michelle's face as he thought, "No i guess i can't. Night Nick. See ya tomorrow."

Laughing, "Yeah tomorrow..after your breakfast with you know who!"

"How'd you know about that Little Nicky?"

"Hey,don't call me that! And anyways, I heard you blabbing on to Michelle about it earlier."

"Damn, nothing's a secret in this house."

"Yeah, nothing!"

***At the NY GAZZETTE***

"You better have a good reason for calling me so late, Karen." the big boss sounded.

"Yeah, well I figured you may want to delay the presses just a bit with this new news."

"I'm listening."

"I've got these pictures."

"Really...what kind of pictures?"

"Devastating ones."

"Oh just the kind I like, what's your price?"

"Nothing much, just the look on Michelle and Brian's face when they see this front page."

"I'll see that this can be arranged, that is if you give me the pictures."

"Of course, tomorrow you'll have them."

***Back at Becca's place***

She woke up with a cold sweat pouring down her face. Rubbing her red, drawn eyes, she yawned. She needed sleep, but it couldn't find her. She gazed over at Kevin. If only she could tell him, confide in him. But she wasn't ready yet. No, she would deal with this on her own...for now. She sniffled, whispering, "Baby...i just can't find the words to say it. If only i could find a way. I love you."

Kevin stirred, turned over, but he didn't wake up.

"Good baby, keep sleeping. No need to burden you. I'll find my way. I hope."

Chapter 22