Hello. I have come to offer to you my advice. Got a problem you need solved? Emotional? Mental? Physical? Well, chances are I probably can't help, but Oreo Sprout is here anyway. All you've got to do is:
1. Get yourself into trouble or fix yourself into a problem
2. Send me an e-mail about it
3. Give me some time to laugh mercilessly at you and your pathetic life
4. Stick your head up . . . ahh, never mind.
5. Check out my knowledgeable words of knowledge.
Even if you don't have a problem and just want to read one of my sarcastically bizarre answers, send me a question anyways; it'll give me something to do after my daily goat cheese worship session.
I can hardly wait to hear from you crazy kids