How to maintain the essential level of drama required to be a true
scenester.

Here are the grades:

Grade 1 - INSTA-RAVER

Less than three months in the scene. 

You still don't know what all the Fuss over vicks is about.  

You love all the music, especially cheesy trance.

 You have not yet figured out why others fuss incessantly over someone who just
plays a couple of records.  

You have one pair of fat pants and you're
Trying to figure out how not to trash the cuffs.  

You gladly pay to get into parties and always take candy to give to people because that's what
you've heard you're supposed to do.  

You make comments like "everyone is just
So friendly here".


Grade 2 - RAVER IN TRAINING

Three to six months in the scene.  

You go to parties to dance and will do so
most of the night.  

You still like most of the music but usually go to take a break when they play jungle.  

You're still buying music at hastings but
you've given you're copy of "rave til dawn" to a friend. 

You've tried E but haven't quite figured out what's so great about it.  

You walked into platinum one day to look but were intimidated by the fact that you didn't
know any of the artists names, not to mention the high level of testosterone. 

You've become somewhat annoyed at the high cost of parties and are wondering why some of your new friends always get in for free.

Grade 3 - RAVER CADET

Six months to one year in the scene.  

You still like to dance, but only when
they play good house or trance, unless, that is, your friend who you met a couple of parties ago is playing in which case you will dance to
whatever style they're playing.  

Your confusion regarding the magic of just
playing a couple of records starts to fade into blind worship as you constantly hear
the phrase "DJ" discussed in a god-like context.  

You receive no less than
ten to twenty hugs when you walk into most parties from all of your good friends you've met in the last couple of months.  

You have learned not to eat a big meal before going to a party and have found enough people
Willing to rub you that E now has a bit more magic than it did at first. 

You're not so much into the candy anymore but you always seem to have vicks, masks
And for some reason a pair of scissors at every party.  

You have stopped purchasing CDs at hastings and prefer mix tapes, either given to you from
friends, or, purchased from the right record stores.  

You have figured out that if you show up a couple of hours early to a party not only do you get
to smoke pot with other RAVER CADETS but you get in free cause you put stuff
up on the wall.

Your basic training is now complete.  At this point you may take one of
The RAVER paths

1: BASIC RAVER
The basic raver just contines exploring what's already been learned. 
The BASIC RAVER overcomes record store anxiety enough to start purchasing at least a couple of records and manages to find an old turntable at the goodwill.

2: JUNGLIST
The junglist is a special type of raver.  Known as slight outcasts they eschew all other types of music and can be heard muttering phrases like
"Jungle is the shit".  Characteristics include anti-social behaviour and limited rhythmic ability.

3: CANDY KID
The candy kid loves to love.  Those that see hugs as another party drug gravitate to this path. Usually confused by the other raver types,
well, usually just confused.


Each of these have their own unique qualities and whichever route you choose you will be taking advantage of the full on RAVER status.  After an
additional year in the scene in one of the above categories you can either stabalize your raver training as you graduate to SCENSTER -or- you can
take one of the advanced paths


1: DJ
2: PROMOTER

Discussing the details of these training paths is beyond the scope of this article, and well, it's just not done, discussing the secrets of DJing
Or 
PROMOTING in public that is. Only SCENESTERs/DJs/PROMOTERs are allowed


To know the inner workings of the scene. There is no shortcutting this, you must go through the steps and it is no shame to be an INSTA-RAVA, just
don't try to pretend your more than that and you won't bring on the wrath of
those who have gone before you.

Much peace and love my fellow ravers and ravers in training and remember,
when you can snatch the candy bracelet from my hand you will know the
path that is right for you.

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