S: Double O Zero, I have some new, really cool spy gadgets for you: a ring that shoots tiny poison darts; hair gel to make your spikes deadly weapons; and finally a watch that is also a powerful explosive
Dollar Coin: Oh, it's so pretty. I want one with a pink strap, I'll be careful with bomb thingy
000: I hope you "accidentally" blow up
Dollar Coin: Whot?
000: Shut up
S: We 'ave to get back to the casino or J and ABs will be worried
Dollar Coin: They shouldn't worry about me, but it's so sweet
000: They're not gay
Dollar Coin: Why not?
000: We only need one ugly, gay member

**Back in the casino, Rich runs to J and ABs and hugs them**

J and ABs: Get off, you bloody poof, or I'll tell Nick, Howie and Lance
Rich: Oh no, they'll be jealous

**After 5ive perform in concert, Double O Zero, S and Dollar Coin go back to HQ**

Leader of British Secret Service: Double O Zero, we have a message from Evil Professor Comrade Jay. It says "If you don't find a way to become more popular than BSB and *NSYNC in 24 hours, the States will cease to exist."
S: Why does 'e want us to become more popular than those boy bands?
Dollar Coin: Maybe he thinks I'm cute. If I was him, I'd think I was cute too
000: No one thinks you're cute. We 'ave to go to Evil Professor Comrade Jay's evil hideout

**At Evil Professor Comrade Jay's evil hideout, Double O Zero, S and Dollar Coin are stuck in a trap and see Number 3**

000: Number 3, I knew Evil Professor Comrade Jay was behind this, but why would 'e want 5ive to become more popular than BSB or *NSYNC?
Evil Professor Comrade Jay: I did it because...um...I don't bloody know. I'm evil, it's what I do. Number 3 attack them
**Number 3 throws sharpened tweezers at the prisoners, but because the cave is dark, he missed, hitting the rope holding them and they are free. Double O Zero runs to Number 3 and Judo chops the turban off his head and discovers he is ABs**
000: Oh no, ABs, why are you trying to kill me and S? I know why you want to kill Dollar Coin, I do too
ABs: Double O Zero, me and J wanted to become more popular than BSB and *NSYNC in America and 5ive was taking too long, so we became impatient, but...J made me do it **starts to cry** I want me mum
000: This means that Evil Professor Comrade Jay is really J
J: No really Double O Zero, or should I say Scott? I'm just wearing an eye patch
Scott: How did you know it was me?
J: I just guessed and you gave yourself up
Scott: Bugger. Anyway, I think I'm going to kick you out of the band
**Cell phone rings**
Scott: 'ello?...Really? That's bloody great **hangs up** Guess what! We get to tour with *NSYNC and some old New Kid this summer
Rich: Really? I can't wait to see my Lancey
All except Rich: Ewww! If we didn't want to become more popular, we wouldn't be able to stay on a bus with you and Lance
J: Scott, did you mean what you said about kicking me out of the band?
Scott: I don't know **makes phone call** What is the legal drinking age over there? 21? O.K., thanks a bunch, chao **to J** J, you're in, just cause I'm nin'een and you're twen'three. I want me beer
ABs: I don't like people that drink, me mum said that it's bad
Scott: ABs, I'm going to pretend that you didn't say that. Let's go rehearse so we can dance better than *NSYNC and that ex-New Kid
Rich: Does that mean I should get a manicure so I can be prettier than Lance?
All except Rich: Yeah (sarcastically)
Rich: Yea, I want pink nails. You guys sure you don't want manicures too?
All except Rich: We're sure
Rich: Your loss, it's so fun

The End

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