Beheaded

Mommmy doesn't have her head anymore
Keep it underneath my bed on the floor
That's alright though
That's okay
She never really used her head anyway

Daddy Called me a silly bore
Bet he won't say that anymore
Because the way his body's severed in two
His vocal chords are gonna be hard to use

*Chorus*
Beheaded
Watch you spurt like a garden hose
Beheaded
Bloody mess all over my clothes

Watch my girlfriend come to the door
Chop off her head, she falls to the floor
Watching my baby's jugular flow
Really makes my motor go

Wrap a towel around the bloody stump
Take my baby's body to the city dump
Then wipe the mess off the bloody axe
Scoop all the heads in my burlap sack

*Chorus*

All my collection
Adorns my room on bamboo poles
Used to be a little
But a little got more and more
Now I'm craving yours

Night brings bad dreams
Bad dreams with guillotines

Off with her head

Find another victim for my machine
Put him in a homemade guillotine
Blade falls, gonna need a casket
Watch the head plop in a wicker basket

Leave the house at a quarter to four
Come back with sixteen or more
Cause the more I want, the more I see
Got a funny feeling coming over me

*Chorus*

Don't Pick It Up

I saw a little kid
As he walked around
He picked a candy bar up
Off the ground
He chowed about a half
Then his face turned blue
Turned out that candy bar was doggy-doo

*Chorus*
Don't pick it up I say
Unless you can throw it away
Don't pick it up I say
You're gonna be bummed that you went that way

You're out there makin' bacon
No scrutiny
You mess around too much
And you got VD
You know you never think
And you're sore today
You're gonna take it back to California

*Chorus*

My friend was kinda hurtin'
For a girl to try
He saw one that looked like Pat
On Saturday Night Live
It had a pair of thingies
But a mustache too
Not clearly male nor female
So now what to do

*Chorus*

Offspring Main Page|Crazywallofstatic Main Page